Learning Social Skills

Welcoming helps all children feel welcome in the classroom. Welcoming someone is a way to show you care. There are many ways to welcome someone new to the class. In this lesson, children are learning to make a friendly greeting by introducing themselves and showing a friend around the classroom. How do you welcome others into your home? 

Listening is an important skill for learning that helps children participate successfully in school. Having clear listening rules helps children listen to the teacher and improves their ability to pay attention during group times. Our listening rules are calm body, eyes watching, ears listening, quiet voice, raise a quiet hand and body in the group. Where can you use the listening rules in your home? 

At school, we practice be safe, be kind and be a friend. To be safe at school, children should be able to recognize a universal attention signal at any location on the ECLC campus (classroom, commons, in line, playground, etc) and follow instructions given by school staff. The goal is for any teacher, assistant teacher, or staff to be able to say “Give Me Three” and all the children know what it means. Children will know how to hold up their three fingers, use a quiet voice, use eyes watching, use ears listening and follow directions. This can be utilized in several different areas throughout the ECLC including daily or emergency situations.  

Focusing attention is an important life skill for all children to learn. A child must learn to focus their attention to be successful while following directions, staying safe, interacting with peers and learning in the classroom. This lesson teaches how to use an “attent-o-scope” to focus attention. Children make circles over their eyes to create binoculars. Their hands prevent them from seeing distractions around them and help them focus on the object they are looking at. Once children form attent-o-scopes and focus, they are able to put down their hands but keep focusing. 

Interrupting politely requires a number of skills. Children must “read” the social situation for pauses and wait for an appropriate opportunity to interrupt. Young children commonly interrupt ongoing conversations. Giving verbal and nonverbal clues is a useful strategy to help children learn to wait. When children raise their hands to interrupt, you can help them wait by saying, “You’ve got your hand up - wait just one more minute.” You can also use a nonverbal signal, such as turning to the child and raising your index finger. Make sure to give children a turn to speak after they have waited: “Thank you for waiting. How can I help you?”

The ability to think about others, play collaboratively and establish friendships involves thought: knowing our own, sharing them with others and taking others’ thoughts into account as we act and react. Children will be able to state what a thought is (idea, picture or quiet words), give an example of a thought in their brain, practice keeping their thoughts in their brain and state unkind thoughts should stay in their brains.

Self-talk is an essential tool to help children listen, focus their attention and follow directions. Self-talk is talking to yourself in a quiet voice or inside your head. Most young children talk to themselves while they are engaging in pretend play or playing cooperatively with peers. Children can practice this concept by saying what they are doing while completing a task.  

Following directions is an important skill for all children to be able to be successful in a variety of environments including school, home, social activities, emergencies, etc. Children can use self-talk or repeating the directions out loud to help them follow directions. When children use their listening skills and follow directions, they are able to increase their knowledge and learn more. Parents can practice following directions at home by playing simple games such as Simon Says.

Children are learning they are part of a group in their class. When everyone is thinking about and doing the same thing it is called a group plan. We talk about the group plan as a way to help children know what is expected to think about and do when they are part of a group. At times, children may struggle with following the group plan and this is referred to as their own plan. Teachers may use social thinking language to help children follow the group plan instead of their own plan. 

Every social situation has rules. Doing what is expected means understanding or figuring out these rules and aligning our behavior with the expectations of the situation. We adapt our behavior to keep others feeling comfortable and having good thoughts about sharing space with us, which makes us comfortable too. Doing what is unexpected means we do not figure out and follow the hidden rules for the situation. When we do what is unexpected people feel uncomfortable and do not have good thoughts about sharing space with us, which makes us uncomfortable too.

It is important for children to be able to communicate their wants and needs in a respectful way. At school, we are teaching children to use words such as “please” and “thank you” and speaking assertively. This skill is used in a variety of settings including the classroom, in line, during breakfast or snack or on the playground. Children can practice this same skill at home too! 

Flexible thinking is the ability to change your “thinking” to adapt to changes in routines, plans and thoughts. Unfortunately things do not always go as planned. Children will learn to be flexible by realizing there are different ways to view a situation, choices, options or learning to compromise. When children are able to identify and choose a different choice, they feel more comfortable in adapting to the situation.