Our favorite kind of days are when the sun is out, a nice breeze is blowing and we can look around and see everyone, and everything is thriving. However, like we all know, there are days where it is rainy, cold and we just want to stay in our bed and hide from the dreary weather. As cheesy as it is and we've all heard it, you have to have the rainy days to have the beautiful flowers bloom. (Cheesy again..) But this is just like our lives, the good comes with the bad. 

This applies to whatever season of life you're in. Pregnant? Trying to become pregnant? Pregnant but not getting the “glow” that everyone raves about. Not receiving the test results you prayed so hard for.  These are the days we don't talk about, because they aren't as glamorous and exciting as the joyful days. Does this mean we shouldn't talk about them though? And if we do talk about them, who do we talk to? While we are asking the hard questions, what are we supposed to do when it seems like everyone is having sunny days and we are getting enough rain we just might drown!

I’ve tried different ways of dealing with these dreary days. I’ve done the “just keep smiling and pushing” tactic. Ignore the emotions, act like they are not real. For example, someone asks “How are you?” with the immediate response “I’ve been good! How are you?” to get the topic off of myself. This has felt like the easiest route to take, but after the fact I am just left with the feeling of more built up emotions inside, until eventually it all comes out in one big rage. So let's get real here, what if instead of pushing the emotions down, pretending that they aren't affecting us, let's call our best girlfriends, call our husband, call our Mama, call your doula. Pick up your phone and call your village. They may not be able to fix the problem, and you may not even want them to “fix” it. The purpose of the call, or the girls night out, the home cooked meal from your mom, is to give your emotions the time and attention they demand.

 You have every right to be sad. You have every right to be mad on rainy days. You are allowed to vent and accept the help from your people. By giving these emotions the moment they deserve, in return we receive the ability to loosen them, become free from them, to find more strength and courage to find the next warm and sunny day, and mama I promise, the sunny day will come! 

 I would like to leave you with one more thing- something we’ve all been told once or twice, “ Well, you can always find something positive in every situation!” While yes this is true in some cases, it can also have the effect of making you feel guilty for having the heavy emotions that the bad days bring. While it can be hard to ignore the guilt, remind yourself that even though things *could* always be worse, it shouldn't make your emotions any less valued or respected. So, yes that means that if you cry over not being able to find that pregnancy craving (it was a blue ICEE in my case), you still deserve that hug, mama.