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Test your assertiveness in interviews
Test your assertiveness in interviews
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Assertiveness is the ability to communicate with others in a clear and direct manner. It has been described as "The Art of telling people what you would like them to do, in a way that they don't feel threatened or put down".
Assertiveness is the ability to communicate with others in a clear and direct manner. It has been described as "The Art of telling people what you would like them to do, in a way that they don't feel threatened or put down".
It differs from being aggressive, where you may get what you want, but may upset people and hinder your progress in the long run.
It differs from being aggressive, where you may get what you want, but may upset people and hinder your progress in the long run.
Some people confuse assertiveness with getting your own way all the time, but there may be occasions when you take the decision to back down on an issue, because you realise that the other person has rights too. It also differs from being passive, where you let others get their own way in most situations and don't stand up for your rights.
Some people confuse assertiveness with getting your own way all the time, but there may be occasions when you take the decision to back down on an issue, because you realise that the other person has rights too. It also differs from being passive, where you let others get their own way in most situations and don't stand up for your rights.
Assertive behaviour helps you to:
Assertive behaviour helps you to:
- Say "No" to the requests of others in a firm but polite way when you don't want to do as they say.
- To avoid being manipulated or put off by others.
- To listen better to what others are saying.
- To stand up for your rights.
- To ask for what you want.
- To achieve "win-win" situations where both parties are happy with the outcome of the situation.
- Being assertive helps you to exercise more control over your life and relationships, and thus may help to increase your self-confidence. It helps you to reduce the stress in your life as you are less bothered about the opinions of others.
- Non-assertive behaviour can lead to loss of respect from others and loss of self-respect in the long term.
Some people confuse assertiveness with aggression!
Assertiveness can be used in many situations, but can be important in performing well at interviews.
Assertiveness can be used in many situations, but can be important in performing well at interviews.
In interviews, assertive behaviour will help you to come across as a confident candidate who is likely to be able to get things done. It is characterised by:
In interviews, assertive behaviour will help you to come across as a confident candidate who is likely to be able to get things done. It is characterised by:
- a firm clear voice,
- eye contact with the interviewer,
- being relaxed rather than nervous,
- an open body posture (e.g. don't have your arms and legs folded tightly),
- saying what you want to say using simple, clear language,
- a direct open manner.
ASSERTIVENESS QUIZ
ASSERTIVENESS QUIZ
There follow 12 questions relating to your behaviour at interview. Try to answer each question according to how you think you would react in the situation described.
There follow 12 questions relating to your behaviour at interview. Try to answer each question according to how you think you would react in the situation described.
The answers to these questions and the analysis of the answers are for your eyes only, so answer as honestly as you can. Try to imagine yourself faced with these situations in a job interview however unlikely they may seem, and then choose from the suggested responses the one closest to what you could imagine yourself saying or doing.
The answers to these questions and the analysis of the answers are for your eyes only, so answer as honestly as you can. Try to imagine yourself faced with these situations in a job interview however unlikely they may seem, and then choose from the suggested responses the one closest to what you could imagine yourself saying or doing.
If you are a teacher or educator, you are welcome to download a PDF version of this test here for use in classrooms etc. for non-commercial purposes only.
If you are a teacher or educator, you are welcome to download a PDF version of this test here for use in classrooms etc. for non-commercial purposes only.
Your behaviour can be classified into three main types: assertive, aggressive and passive. The results given above tell you how many of your responses fell into each of the above categories.
Your behaviour can be classified into three main types: assertive, aggressive and passive. The results given above tell you how many of your responses fell into each of the above categories.
Assertive Responses:
Assertive Responses:
Assertive Responses are based on clear, open, straightforward communications. They demonstrate a respect both for the interviewer and yourself, saying what you mean without being impolite, asking for what you want without making demands. This style is far more likely to create a positive impression than either aggressiveness or non-assertion. Assertive behaviour is not specifically designed to get you what you want in all situations, in fact it involves negotiation and compromise. The long term effects of such a style are that you are likely to develop a better sense of control and of having value and significance.
Assertive Responses are based on clear, open, straightforward communications. They demonstrate a respect both for the interviewer and yourself, saying what you mean without being impolite, asking for what you want without making demands. This style is far more likely to create a positive impression than either aggressiveness or non-assertion. Assertive behaviour is not specifically designed to get you what you want in all situations, in fact it involves negotiation and compromise. The long term effects of such a style are that you are likely to develop a better sense of control and of having value and significance.
These are direct, responsible, honest, clear, accepting, forgiving, spontaneous, effective responses.
These are direct, responsible, honest, clear, accepting, forgiving, spontaneous, effective responses.
I have the right to:
I have the right to:
- make mistakes!
- express my feelings, opinions and values
- state my own needs and set my own priorities
- be treated with respect as an equal human being
- say yes or no
- change my mind
- say I don't understand
- ask for what I want
- not take responsibility for other people's problems.
Aggressive Responses:
Aggressive Responses:
Aggressive Responses are characterised by an attempt to punish or outcountenance the person with whom you are dealing. Such responses may occasionally be appropriate or even necessary, but you are asking for trouble if you use this style in an interview. You might just get away with the aggressive responses in questions 4, 5 and 6, but don't bank on it. If you are generally aggressive in your behaviour, most people will choose to stay clear of you and to organise their jobs and their lives in ways that do not involve you. These are arrogant, pushy, bullying, blaming, sarcastic, vengeful, callous, manipulative, offensive responses.
Aggressive Responses are characterised by an attempt to punish or outcountenance the person with whom you are dealing. Such responses may occasionally be appropriate or even necessary, but you are asking for trouble if you use this style in an interview. You might just get away with the aggressive responses in questions 4, 5 and 6, but don't bank on it. If you are generally aggressive in your behaviour, most people will choose to stay clear of you and to organise their jobs and their lives in ways that do not involve you. These are arrogant, pushy, bullying, blaming, sarcastic, vengeful, callous, manipulative, offensive responses.
Passive or non-Assertive Responses:
Passive or non-Assertive Responses:
Passive or non-Assertive Responses may seem polite and accommodating, but they give the impression of lack of drive, confidence and self-respect. Unless you are applying for a job that offers no room for initiative, they are unlikely to create a good impression, and as a general style passive or non-assertive behaviour is likely to leave you feeling like a doormat and full of resentment. Interviewers may pity you, but few of them are likely to choose you. These are apologetic, inhibited, deferential, powerless, avoiding, moaning responses.
Passive or non-Assertive Responses may seem polite and accommodating, but they give the impression of lack of drive, confidence and self-respect. Unless you are applying for a job that offers no room for initiative, they are unlikely to create a good impression, and as a general style passive or non-assertive behaviour is likely to leave you feeling like a doormat and full of resentment. Interviewers may pity you, but few of them are likely to choose you. These are apologetic, inhibited, deferential, powerless, avoiding, moaning responses.
SUMMARY
SUMMARY
The purpose of this exercise is to demonstrate and make a distinction between the different kinds of response that interviewees make in job interviews and to give you a chance to consider if you need to adjust your usual style in this situation. Be open, but remember that the interview is not a confessional. Be positive, even about negative experiences.
The purpose of this exercise is to demonstrate and make a distinction between the different kinds of response that interviewees make in job interviews and to give you a chance to consider if you need to adjust your usual style in this situation. Be open, but remember that the interview is not a confessional. Be positive, even about negative experiences.
Answers to the questions:
Answers to the questions:
Q . AGGRESSIVE PASSIVE ASSERTIVE
1) C B A
2) B C A
3) C A B
4) B A C
5) B A C
6) A C B
7) A B C
8) A B C
9) B C A
10) C A B
11) C B A
12) A C B
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