Forgiveness Contemplations:
You may want to record the instructions and play them back to yourself, or have someone read the instructions to you. Of course it is also possible that you have previously resolved all resentment issues. If so, there would be no need to practice these forgiveness contemplations. If you are dealing with resentment, please choose the one forgiveness meditation that resonates with you the most and practice it each day until your resentment has dissipated.
FORGIVENESS TOWARDS OTHERS:
Please close your eyes and begin by gently following your breath.
Imagine a room where the only furnishings are two chairs facing each other. You are sitting in one chair and the chair opposite you is empty. Behind the empty chair is a door.
There is a knock at the door and you ask the person to come in. Into the room comes someone you have been angry with for a long time. (It can be a person presently in your life, someone from the past, or even someone who has passed away.)
Do not use yourself for this part of the exercise.
If several people come to mind, allow in only the person for whom you have the greatest amount of resentment.
You will have other opportunities to meet with the others.
Ask the person to sit in the chair facing you.
Carefully look at that individual. Notice what he or she is wearing. Look at his or her facial characteristics and the way their hair is styled.
Look directly into that person’s eyes. Imagine that he or she really wants to be forgiven.
You are not condoning or approving of what that person did – you are just trying to let go of the anger, resentment and hatred in your own heart.
Now say to that person,
I forgive you for the hurtful things you said to me.
I forgive you for the lies you told me and for those you told to others about me.
If you get carried away emotionally, please come back to your breath.
I forgive you for all you have done to hurt me.
I forgive you for betraying me.
I forgive you for all the threats you made.
I forgive you for not forgiving me.
I forgive you for not treating me in the same way you treated others.
I forgive you for judging me so harshly and thinking so badly of me.
Of course it can be difficult to forgive someone who we believe has hurt us. Keep remembering that this process is a gift for you to free yourself from the memories and emotions that bind you to the past.
Let your heart open to that person a bit more with this final thought of forgiveness.
Look at the person and say,
I forgive you.
As the person stands up to leave, if it is comfortable for you to do so, hug the person before he or she departs.
The person now walks toward the door, opens it and leaves.
Take a deep cleansing breath - someone else is waiting.
FORGIVING YOURSELF:
Again you hear a knock at the door and respond by inviting the person to come in. As the person enters the room, you realize that it is yourself who has entered. Ask yourself to sit in the chair which faces you.
Carefully look at yourself. Notice what you are wearing. Look at your facial characteristics and the way your hair is styled.
Look directly into your own eyes. Acknowledge how much you want to be able to forgive yourself for all your past misdeeds so you can finally move on with your life.
Now calling yourself by your name, say,
I forgive you.
I forgive you for the hurtful things you have said to others.
I forgive you for the hurtful things you have said to yourself.
I forgive you for all the lies you have told.
I forgive you for all that you have done to hurt other people throughout your life, no matter how terrible those things may have been.
I forgive you for not taking a stand and letting others mistreat you.
I forgive you for being human and not being perfect.
Calling yourself by name say,
I forgive you.
Let your heart open to yourself just a bit more as you offer this one final thought of forgiveness.
See yourself standing up. If you are comfortable with doing so, give yourself a hug. Now open the door and see yourself leaving the room.
Take a deep cleansing breath and open your eyes.
FORGIVENESS CONTEMPLATION:
(Created by Stephen Levine)
Bring into your heart the image of someone for whom you feel much resentment. Take a moment to feel that person right there in the center of your chest.
And in your heart say to that person, “For anything you may have done that caused me pain, anything you did either intentionally or unintentionally, through your thoughts, words, or actions, I forgive you.
Slowly allow that person to settle into your heart. No force - just open to them at your own pace. Say to them, “I forgive you.” Gently, gently open to them. If it hurts, let it hurt. Begin to relax the iron grip of your resentment, to let go of that incredible anger. Say to them, “I forgive you.” And allow them to be forgiven.
Now bring into your heart the image of someone you wish to ask for forgiveness. Say to them, “For anything I may have done that caused you pain, my thoughts, my actions, my words, I ask for your forgiveness. For all those words that were said out of forgetfulness or fear or confusion, I ask your forgiveness.
Don’t allow any resentment you may hold for yourself to block your reception of that forgiveness. Let your heart soften to it. Allow yourself to be forgiven. Open to the possibility of forgiveness. Holding them in your heart say to them, “For whatever I may have done that caused you pain, I ask for your forgiveness.”
Now bring an image of yourself into your heart, floating at the center of your chest. Bring yourself into your heart, and using your own first name, say to yourself, For all that you have done in forgetfulness and fear and confusion, for all the words and thoughts and actions that may have caused pain to anyone, I forgive you.
Open to the possibility of self-forgiveness. Let go of all the bitterness, the hardness, the judgment of yourself. Make room in your heart for yourself. Say, “I forgive you” to you.