Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash
I've talked with a number of students recently who are struggling...struggling with life, college, anxiety, depression, relationships, family, juggling work and life, feeling alone...there is a lot of struggling and suffering. So, instead of sending a Well-Being Wednesday message out into the Interwebs without any expectation that you do something to facilitate your well-being this week, I am going to replace our normal class content this week with a "Well-Being Week of action." Instead of working on this week's material, I am asking you to do some self-care work and do some reflection on that self-care and how it impacted you. Several of you have said to me, "I am too busy to do ____ (fill-in-the-blank)!" Well, by not assigning new class work this week I am giving you several hours to do some of that self-care work.
First, what is self-care? I encourage you all to listen to an episode of Chelsea Tanner's Align Your Mind podcast titled "Real Self Care." In that episode, Tanner argues that self-care has been co-opted by "capitalism and Instagram," having convinced us that self-care is equivalent to spending money on manicures, essential oils, aromatherapy, spa treatments and "retail-therapy." We might enjoy those things but Tanner suggests those distractions will not get at the root of what is causing our anxiety, depression, loneliness, confusion, etc. Instead, Tanner defines self-care as "how you treat yourself; what you do for yourself in the long-term and how to deal with hard moments when you feel unmotivated or you just can't seem to handle things." Tanner goes on to say:
I think about caring for myself just like a parent would care for me or how I would want a parent to care for me. This seems kind of weird but as an adult I think we need that just as much as kids do but people don't teach us how to do this. When I'm anxious or sad I tell myself what I need to hear which is usually that it's all gonna be OK--like everything will workout--it's gonna be OK. When I make a mistake I aim to treat myself with compassion and understanding just like I want someone else to treat me with compassion and understanding; this is how I think self care should be framed. It's a skill; it's practicable
So, self-care is a skill that we must practice in order to get better at employing it in our lives. We must thus make it a priority, carving out time for that which is a foundation for school, work and everything else in life. So, this week, I'm giving you time away from class stuff to explore self-care and how you might better integrate self-care into your everyday life after this week.
Here is what I am asking you to do this week:
Engage in at least 2 acts of self-care this week. To draw inspiration, check out the various Well-Being Wednesday segments on this site. You can also check out this article from Psychology Today, which you can access by clicking on this hyperlinked text. I also recommend a New York Times piece on journaling which you can access by clicking on this hyperlinked text.
Write a reflection paper describing the following kinds of things:
How do you define self-care? In what self-care practices, if any, have you engaged in the past?
In what activities did you engage this week for the Well-Being Week? Were these new self-care strategies that you experimented with? Self-care that you have been doing? Acts of self-care that you used to practice but had fallen out of practice?
What were the challenges of engaging in these self-care practices? What were the benefits that you experienced?
How likely will it be that you maintain these self-care practices after this week? What factors will permit or prohibit you from doing so?
Anything else you want to write is welcome.
Be kind to yourself and take advantage of this time to practice self-care.