Below is a Master Coach expansion of COMENSA Behavioural Standard 3: Building Trust & Rapport .
1. Establish a safe, ethical professional relationship
How:
Set clear coaching contract and expectations upfront
Clarify roles (coach vs friend/therapist/mentor)
Align on outcomes and boundaries early
Reinforce ethical framework (COMENSA)
Check understanding and agreement
Say:
“Before we begin, I want us to be clear on what coaching is and isn’t, so you feel safe and fully supported in this space.”
2. Build trust through consistency, honesty, transparency
How:
Be punctual and reliable in every session
Be transparent about process and limitations
Admit when you don’t know something
Follow through on commitments
Avoid hidden agendas
Say:
“I will always be honest with you about what I’m observing and what I can or cannot do as your coach.”
3. Maintain clear professional boundaries
How:
Do not give personal advice as “solutions”
Avoid rescuing or over-functioning
Keep focus on client autonomy
Redirect dependency behaviours
Regularly re-anchor coaching purpose
Say:
“My role is not to tell you what to do, but to help you think clearly so your own answers become visible.”
4. Active listening, presence, non-judgment
How:
Remove distractions completely
Reflect and paraphrase client words
Use silence intentionally
Avoid interrupting or fixing
Track emotional tone and meaning
Say:
“I want to make sure I understand you fully—say more about what that felt like for you.”
5. Create psychological safety
How:
Validate experience without agreement
Avoid criticism or correction
Normalise client emotions
Maintain calm tone and pace
Allow vulnerability without pressure
Say:
“This is a space where you don’t need to filter yourself—you can say exactly what’s true for you.”
6. Maintain confidentiality
How:
Explain confidentiality limits clearly
Store notes securely
Avoid discussing clients externally
Never share identifying details
Reinforce trust through behaviour
Say:
“What you share here stays confidential, except in situations where safety or law requires otherwise.”
7. Communicate confidentiality limits (informed consent)
How:
Explain limits in simple language
Confirm client understanding verbally
Document consent
Revisit when risk increases
Keep explanation consistent
Say:
“I want to make sure you understand exactly when I would need to escalate something for safety reasons.”
8. Avoid dual relationships/conflicts of interest
How:
Do not coach close friends/family
Disclose potential conflicts early
Avoid financial/personal entanglements
Maintain role clarity
Refer out when needed
Say:
“To keep our work clean and effective, I need to stay fully in the role of your coach.”
9. Cultural awareness and respect
How:
Ask, don’t assume cultural context
Educate yourself continuously
Avoid bias-based interpretations
Respect identity language
Adapt communication style
Say:
“I’d like to understand how your background or culture shapes how you see this situation.”
10. Empowering language use
How:
Replace “should” with curiosity
Focus on strengths
Avoid judgmental phrasing
Use future-focused language
Reinforce agency
Say:
“What options do you feel you have here that you might not have fully considered yet?”
11. Empathy without over-identification
How:
Acknowledge emotions clearly
Do not merge personal story with client
Stay grounded and neutral
Reflect feelings accurately
Maintain professional distance
Say:
“That sounds really overwhelming, and I can hear how much pressure that has created for you.”
12. Maintain professionalism in emotional intensity
How:
Stay calm under pressure
Slow down conversation when needed
Regulate your own emotional response
Avoid panic or overreaction
Anchor back to coaching structure
Say:
“I’m here with you in this, and we can take this step by step together.”
13. Identify and manage risk situations
How:
Recognise red flags (self-harm, abuse, addiction escalation)
Ask direct safety questions when needed
Do not avoid difficult topics
Follow safeguarding protocols
Document observations objectively
Say:
“I need to ask you something directly to make sure you are safe right now.”
14. Follow correct reporting procedures
How:
Know legal/ethical thresholds
Escalate to supervisors when required
Follow organisational policy
Document timelines and actions
Keep process structured and factual
Say:
“I want to be transparent that I may need to follow formal safety procedures here.”
15. Prioritise client welfare + legal obligation
How:
Balance trust with duty of care
Make safety the highest priority
Avoid secrecy in high-risk cases
Seek supervision when uncertain
Act without delay when required
Say:
“My priority is your safety above everything else in our work together.”
16. Accurate, factual documentation
How:
Record observable facts only
Avoid assumptions or interpretations
Time-stamp key events
Keep language neutral
Store securely
Say:
“I’m noting this down exactly as you’ve described it so there is clarity and accuracy.”
17. Communicate reporting actions appropriately
How:
Inform client when safe to do so
Explain reason for escalation
Avoid secrecy unless necessary for safety
Maintain calm tone
Support emotional impact
Say:
“I want to let you know what steps I need to take next, and I’ll walk you through it.”
18. Integrity in sensitive handling
How:
Never misuse client information
Keep referral processes professional
Avoid gossip or informal sharing
Maintain respect in all documentation
Act consistently with ethical code
Say:
“You can trust that I will handle this information with complete integrity.”
19. Reflect on personal bias
How:
Regular supervision/reflective practice
Notice emotional triggers
Separate client story from personal opinion
Challenge assumptions
Continuously self-correct
Say:
“I want to pause and check whether I’m seeing this clearly without my own bias influencing it.”
20. Trust is ongoing, not one-time
How:
Rebuild trust after ruptures
Check in regularly on relationship quality
Stay consistent over time
Acknowledge mistakes openly
Maintain long-term presence
Say:
“Trust isn’t something we set once—it’s something we keep building together as we work.”