dad leaves, never comes back
[J] was left on the streets of West Virginia today when his dad left for cigarettes and never came back. When we asked him about this, he said "Epic. That's a fat battle royale." We hired snipers to take him the fuck out directly after his statement.
HIs dad later came back, stating he was only going out to get some jONES BBQ FOOT MASSAGE CRISPY CRUNCHY FIRED CHICKEN. We hired an assassin to fucking eat his ass.
In other news today, a man named Jorgay is selling his book called "Bruh: The Story, The Complete History." We read it and it's an absolute nut whacker. Here's a picture of the fucker with his arse book.
Comics
fUn fAcT oF tHe DaY! :)
one person commits suicide every 40 seconds (:
Questions Column
TAYLOR asks: is garfield single? If so, can you send me his number?
...no. i took him already.