The Bully, Footsteps, and Show Me

The Bully, Footsteps, and

Show Me

by Jennifer Duffy

written for the 2012 Invitational ELL Summer Institute

The Bully

Emerald fronds notice it first,

they applaud her arrival

softly, sweetly with promises laden

until she begins to bluster, to bellow,

to bully them all.

Silver birches are next,

they whisper, they whisper,

then flutter and sway and brandish their arms

Not again, not today they entreat

Grey clouds push on over,

the black lake starts to heave

whitecaps?

Not today, they sigh again

A tree-rat stops briefly

Bambi’s eyes search the brush

the lone butterball fluffs up

with disdain in her strut

Later… tomorrow, tomorrow they plead

Rhododendrons in tow

even the needles bend low

All right, she breathes softly

soothed for the night

they’ve done it,

they’ve done it

Peace. Peace at twilight.

Footsteps

I know I heard it.

There are footsteps outside.

By the window by my bed

The drumbeat behind my eyes begins,

I cannot breathe.

I wipe my hands on the pillow

and reach beneath.

The metal is cold,

I can barely hold it.

Two hands, then.

A death grip.

Hopefully not mine tonight.

The door squeaks open.

Tap, tap, tap.

Are those footsteps on the roof?

I know I heard them.

beboom, beboom, beboom

They must hear me.

My feet slide along the tile.

They must hear me now.

Shadow expands the muzzle, the trigger

moonlight glinting on the barrel.

Is a shaking gun even a threat?

The door across the hall slams open.

I think my heart has stopped.

What's going on? he asks,

gently untangling his death from my fingers.

I hear them, I whisper.

You're ok. Go back to sleep.

Sleep?

There are people on the roof.

I hear them

On the other side of the window, the wall.

I am surrounded, my eyes implore.

Sleep.

You're OK.

It's ok.

It'll be OK.

Will it ever?

Show Me

I’m not in the pictures,

not of the gods

I’m not in the pictures,

not of the crowds

I’m not in the Olde world

not in the New

Why can’t I find me?

Why do I care?

Is no-one else looking?

Does no-one else care?

Too old for this angst now

too weary to wander

Will somebody find me?

I don’t see me here.

Jennifer Duffy is the lead teacher at Cramp Elementary. Jenn attended the 2012 Invitational ELL Summer Institute sponsored by the Philadelphia Writing Project.

Jennifer wrote the poems as part of the Invitational ELL Summer Institute.

  • “The Bully” describes the first storm she watched roll in over her new lake house in the Pocono mountains.

  • “Footsteps” describes her response to her family home in South Africa being burgled. She was in the home at the time and afterwards was plagued by nightmares and couldn't sleep. She took her brother's gun to keep herself safe but continued to be plain terrified. This particular instance stands out because it was the first time that she wondered whether the gun actually was making her feel safe.

  • “Show Me” is a response to a visit to the Penn Museum during the Invitational ELL Summer Institute.