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Dear Uncle Merlin,

I hope you’re sitting down because this is the strangest adventure yet. I know I say that a lot. But this one will take a lot to top!

What if I told you Doctor Robotnik invented time travel? Well… Doctor Robotnik invented time travel! I don’t know how he did it but he did it! He went back in time and changed Mobian history. We found the broken remnants of his time altering device to prove it! As a result of his meddling, the Green Hill Zone was now the Brown Hill Zone and it was totally smelly and disgusting! Worse than that, our friends were gone- erased from history! In their place were new “friends” who were just awful. There was a coypu by the name of Carrie- apparently in this rewritten world, she was my super clingy fiancée! Then there was Eric the Echidna. I’ve never heard of an echidna before. He’s like no animal I’ve ever seen on Mobius.

Anyway, Carrie and Eric were pawns of Robotnik, big surprise! They hurled Sonic and I through some kind of space-time portal and that was that. Except it wasn’t! Somehow, we ended up in the Fourth Dimension, which is some sort of world between worlds. It’s like a gigantic facility that stretches off into forever with infinite space in all directions. Kind of mind-boggling if you think about it, so probably best not to bother.

Anyway, we met a bunch of factions in the fourth dimension. There was the Time Police, with Agent Grey and Agent Orange (which, according to Porker, is a very unfortunate codename). They were nice. And the council of elders who kept all of space-time law in check. We met Elder Jay and Elder Kay- the job runs in the family, apparently.

But there was a war on, and that was less nice. All the fantastical creatures you’ve read of in fiction? Well, they exist in the fourth dimension- they’re known as mythos creatures. They were fighting to survive, they just wanted a place to exist. But the fourth dimension’s special forces (we met Captain Karl and the very unusually named Sergeant Sir) thought the mythos creatures were an abomination against the laws of time, so wanted them wiped out. The mythos creatures were led by a guy named Arctur, who was apparently a Dragonkin. I guess it’s kind of like a dragon like my friend Dulcy, only much, much bigger and way more scary!

Anyway, Son I had a brilliant idea (if I do say so myself). Since the facility stretched off into forever, I figured what was stopping the fourth dimensioners from letting the mythos creatures live in peace on one of the floors of their world? It’s weird how sometimes when presented with a simple solution you get peace.

Sonic and I weren’t done there, though. We learned that not only had Robotnik gone back in time and planted the seeds of his technological weirdness in the past. Over the centuries, the computers had become more and more advanced as they took in more data. And then Robotnik took those advanced computers to the past! And then those computers became more advanced! And so on and so forth until by the time we knew about it, Mobius was just a horrible metal nightmare. It’s enough to make you cry.

So Sonic suggested we go back in time to the past and stop Robotnik from ever existing. We used a time machine given to us by the time police and Sonic was able to prevent the R.O.C.C. from exploding- Doctor Kintobor never became Doctor Robotnik!

I’m afraid I don’t remember much about the next bit.

See, I’m sure I’ve told you about how I met Sonic and how he became my sidekick.

Well… if the R.O.C.C. never exploded, Sonic never got infused with the power of the Chaos Emeralds. He never turned Super Sonic. And he never met me that day.

And since he saved my life… I was sort of wiped out of history.

But don’t worry, obviously I’m okay now!

But Sonic had to do something awful to save me. He didn’t want to live in a world where I drowned in the Swampland Zone. So he used the time machine to stop himself from stopping the R.O.C.C. explosion. And that was me saved.

Sonic had chosen me over his friend Doctor Kintobor.

I’m glad he did. But I feel really bad. I take him for granted sometimes. He’s an amazing friend.

Oh, right, I missed part of the story out.

See, Sonic didn’t get it right the first time. He shoved Doctor Kintobor to safety, sure, but Sonic- the original Sonic who was there in the past- was the one caught in the R.O.C.C. explosion instead! So instead of Kintobor becoming Robotnik, Sonic became… Cinos!

Fortunately, before the timelines caught up with him, Sonic was able to use the time machine once more and set everything right. A world with an evil mirror of Sonic sounds terrifying!

So now we were back where we were to begin with. So Sonic

I suggested

Sonic suggested we pull a little trick on Robotnik.

We went forward in time, to the point Robotnik first used his time machine- and we replaced his working machine with the broken one we’d found to begin with. As far as he knew, his experiment was a failure and he put his time travel plans on hold.

Everything was as it was to begin with. Thank goodness.

I’d much rather live in a world with Sonic as my friend than one with Carrie the Coypu suffocating me.

Hopefully the contents of my next letter will be a little less crazy.

Miles

“Tails”

On to Chapter 90