Coyote and His Anus

by Alan Nafzger & Lilly Tabbytite (Comanche)

Coyote and His Anus...

A coyote was walking along by a large river when he became very hungry. He constructed a trap out of poplar poles and willow branches and placed it in the water. "Salmon!" he exclaimed. "Enter this trap." Soon after, a large salmon arrived and swam into the trap's chute before flopping out on the bank, where Coyote clubbed him to death.

"I'll find a nice spot in the shade and broil this up," Coyote reasoned. He returned to the cottonwoods, built a fire, and set the salmon to broil while he napped.

Some egg hunters arrived while he was sleeping.

"Look at the coyote sleeping over there," the raccoon observed.

"Look at that big fish he's cooking," Fox said.

"Let's eat Coyote's salmon and broil his anus in its place," Wolf suggested.

They went up to Coyote's sleeping quarters.

"Coyote, we're going to eat your salmon, all right?" said Raccoon.

Coyote remained silent. Raccoon inquired four times. Coyote finally made a sound in his sleep. "He says it's fine," Raccoon said. "He says we can eat as much as we want."

They ate the salmon whole, and then they cut out Coyote's anus and threw it in the fire. They then hid behind some trees on a hill to observe.

Coyote stood up after a while. The salmon was cooking, and he could smell it. He went down to the river to wash his hands and get a drink before beginning his meal. As he was returning from the river, he noticed that his salmon had vanished, and he dashed up to the fire to find out what had happened.

"This looks like something Fox would do," Coyote thought. It's typical of him to steal salmon.' But he did leave this nice piece of meat behind, so it might be okay. " The Coyote removed the piece of meat from the fire. It was exactly how he liked it, with a lot of grease dripping off of it. He started eating it.

"Coyote!" the egg hunters yelled from behind the trees. You're consuming your own anus! "

The Coyote jumped to his feet. "What was it?" I believe they buried someone alive here once. His spirit is beckoning to me. "

"Coyote, you're eating your own anus," the egg hunters said again.

An ant had just run into the space between Coyote's buttocks where his anus should have been. Coyote went back to scratch, but there was nothing there. "I have no anus," he exclaimed. He then realized what had occurred. He examined the piece of meat in his hand. There was practically nothing left. He reinserted the small piece of meat, but he had to walk around with his buttocks pinched together to keep it in place. He could hear some people laughing behind some trees, and when they slipped away, he recognized them.

"I'm going to follow them and exact my revenge for this horrible thing."

When the egg hunters had finished collecting their eggs, they brought them all down to the river and dug a pit in the bottom, where they built a fire. They heated the fire with stones, and when it was reduced to coals, they covered it with twigs and grass and placed the eggs inside. They then covered the eggs with dirt and went to bed.

A coyote walked into their camp and dug up the eggs, eating all but a few. He thought to himself that they were almost as good as salmon. He returned one egg to the pit for each person and covered them up. He combined the last few eggs and used the batter to paint everyone's faces. He shook his head as he approached Fox. "You! I knew you'd show up. "You're a terrible person.

When he was finished, Coyote hid in some nearby brush.

When the egg hunters awoke, they opened the pit and discovered that each of them had one egg. "Just right," everyone agreed. However, when they dug deeper into the grass and twigs, they discovered only shells. They started accusing each other right away, pointing to the egg batter on each other's faces. Then they heard the coyote laughing and rolling around in the bushes.

"Coyote did it!" exclaimed Raccoon. Let's go after him. "

But Coyote could see them coming. "Let them come after me," he reasoned. "I am far too quick. They'll simply exhaust themselves. " Coyote took off with a burst of speed. Everyone except Fox had given up the chase after a while. When Coyote noticed that only Fox remained, he came to a halt and waited for him.

"I knew you were up to something, Fox. It's exactly like you. " Fox and Coyote sat and laughed about what had occurred. They then stood up and went somewhere together. They were great pals.