Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships
Disclaimer: As with all personal/social topics, some of this content may be sensitive for students and families. Please speak with your parents/guardians for guidance when navigating the public education and support resources below.
Healthy Friendships/Relationships vs. Unhealthy Friendships/Relationships
In healthy friendships and relationships, people can feel safe, respected and accepted for who they are. In unhealthy friendsdhips and relationships, people may feel anxious, confused, uncertain and even unsafe. Knowing these differences can help you make choices about who you involve in your life and for how long. Find out more with the information and resources below!
Signs of a healthy friendship/relationship:
Being yourself: you feel comfortable around the other person. Changing yourself to please someone else won’t work in the long run and can frustrate your close friends and family, so it’s important to be yourself.
Honesty: you feel comfortable talking about things in the relationship, including problems or concerns.
Good communication: you discuss things that are important to you or your friendship or relationship. You ask each other what you’re thinking and feeling and you listen to each other.
Respect: you respect and support each other, and listen to each other’s concerns. It’s important to treat yourself with respect and say no to things that make you uncomfortable.
Feeling safe: if you feel threatened in any way, you’re not in a healthy relationship or friendship. Feeling safe is both emotional and physical. It’s important to know that the other person won’t try to hurt your feelings or your body.
Trust: trust is about being able to count on someone. It’s about believing that someone will be honest with you and follow through on their promises. When you trust someone, you know that they’ll support you and look out for you. You have each other’s best interests at heart.
Equality: equality keeps relationships and friendships safe and fair. For example, being equal in a relationship means sharing the power, not bossing each other around. Equality can also mean sharing the effort as well.
Support: support is about feeling cared for and respected. In healthy relationships and friendships, people listen to each other, help out with problems and show support by attending important events.
Signs of a unhealthy friendship/relationship:
While it’s common to fight or bicker in most friendships or relationships, sometimes these can become toxic and leave a person feeling insecure or scared.
Here are some signs of an unhealthy relationship:
Physical abuse: the other person pushes you, hits you or destroys your things.
Control: the other person tells you what to do, what to wear or who to hang out with. They constantly check up on you or use threats (for example, to harm you or themselves) to make you do things.
Humiliation: the other person calls you names, puts you down or makes you feel bad in front of others.
Unpredictability: the other person gets angry easily and you don’t know what will set them off. You feel like you’re walking on eggshells.
Pressure: the other person pushes you to do things you don’t want to do or aren’t ready for, including things that are not safe. They don’t take “no” for an answer and they use threats.
See example below of having a "good" conversation that is mutually respectful and interesting to both people involved.
Be sure you are speaking to others in this way, and that others are speaking to you in this way!
