Roommates

Before you become roommates . . .

Choosing roommates may be one of the most important decisions you will have to make as an off-campus resident. To make a more informed choice, we encourage you and your prospective roommates to sit down together and use this guide to lead the discussion. By discussing important issues now, you may avoid problems later on. Explore your differences thoroughly and your tolerance of those differences.

Most prospective roommates discuss basic questions like what type of housing and how many roommates they want, but it's important not to stop here. You might also gain considerable benefit from discussion of habits, preferences, and expectations. Be sure to define terms; what you mean by sometimes, quiet, clean, and so forth may differ drastically from what another person means. Once you have completed the getting-acquainted process, take plenty of time before making a decision. Remember to weigh compatibility and conflicts carefully, and don't be afraid to say no. Once you have selected your roommates, we suggest that you establish house rules immediately and write them down.

Before agreeing to live with someone new, make sure you talk about policies of smoking, pets, cleanliness, and how bills will be split. Culture also plays a part, so discuss different habits if you are going to be rooming with people with a culture different from yours (such as use of common spaces, quiet hours, expectations about kitchen use, etc). Ask before moving in just so you have no surprises, and check out the guide below for tips to lead the discussion.

Things For You To Consider

The Basics

• What type of rental agreement do I want, e.g. month-to-month or lease?

• How much can I pay for rent and utilities?

• Do I want to live with persons of the same sex or in a co-ed household?

• What size of residence do I want? Do I want my own bedroom? How many roommates would I be comfortable with?

• What type of residence do I want-apartment, house, duplex, room in a private home, mobile home, or condominium?

• What about location-distance from campus (or work), proximity to shopping, type of neighborhood?

• Do I want a furnished or unfurnished place?

• What special requirement do I have-laundry; storage; study; entertainment, outdoor, hobby, and cooking space; parking; wheelchair accessibility?

Things to Discuss with Prospective Roommates

Habits

• Do you smoke? If not, how do you feel about living with someone who smokes?

  • N.B.: How do you define 'smoking'? Does this entail only cigarettes or other substances? (This can prevent unfortunate misunderstandings!)

• How do you feel about alcohol/drug use in your household?

• What degree of neatness and cleanliness is important to you?

• Do you have a special diet or other special health requirements?

• How much time do you spend at home?

• Is energy conservation important to you?

Preferences

• Do you prefer to study at home? If so, when are you most likely to study?

• Are music/TV OK? If so, what kind of music, how often, and how loud? What noise level can you tolerate?

• How often do you want to have friends visit?

• How do you feel about overnight guests, male and female? How many nights should they stay?

• Should frequent guests who eat at your home share the food costs?

• Do you have/want a pet? What kind and how many?

• Are you willing to allow a roommate to have a pet?

• How much privacy do you need?

• Are you willing to share personal items-supplies, stereo, clothing? Do you expect to be asked for permission to use them?

Expectations

• Will we cook together or buy groceries and prepare meals independently?

• How will housekeeping responsibilities be divided? Split the chores 50/50? Take turns?

• How will rent, utilities, groceries, and supplies be divided? Can you rely on each other to pay bills on time?

• How will you solve problems? When I am upset about something that directly concerns my roommate, I will . . . When my roommate is upset about something that directly concerns me, I expect my roommate to . . .

If you decide to live together after discussing these issues, recognize that the process of communicating has just begun. Your roommate cannot read your mind! Set a pattern of communicating and working together on common concerns. Make a commitment to continue to be open, honest, assertive, and considerate. Remember, roommates are a choice! See the Conflicts Resolution Tips under the Wellness section for tips on how to discuss difficult topics.

-from the Student Housing Office, University of California, Davis 7/84

Searching for new roommates

There may be circumstances in which you or someone in your household may change locations or leave early in the lease. In this case, you may be in the market for a new roommate!

Creating an ad

Take the time to provide some information in your listing to make it easier on potential roommates. Give appropriate contact information (and list appropriate times to call you) and provide some information about the place. Always give the address or at least general location of the place right in the ad, and if it is an apartment complex then be sure to name which one it is. This is perhaps the most important step, as many people looking for housing will research the place themselves if they see an ad for a room available.

Post or provide links to pictures of the place, especially of the floor plan. You can usually find these images for apartments online by looking at the place's website.

Make sure you give your gender, and whether or not you are open to living co-ed or need a specific sex.

Consider things from the others' perspective. Give them stuff they want to know right up-front. Tell them if they get their own room, and if there's an option for them to share it with one of their friends (or one of your current roommates, or another roommate). Tell them a bit about yourself and what they might expect when they live with you - if you're up-front about how you're a quiet recluse or sociable party-friendly person then you're much more likely to find a good match for a roommate.

Remember, you can post your ad as many places you want - go nuts. As a courtesy, however, remember to take them down once you fill the place - it'll also save you from unneeded phone calls in the morning.

- Adapted from the Davis Wiki Rental Housing Guide