I sit and think. deeply and thoroughly. in the nick of time, the meditation starts to unveil every single column in my mind, relentlessly. but I would like to bring up only a piece from those shattered departments.
I always had a feeling that I am a free rider. A boy who doesn't ensure that his work is done. the one that everyone is annoyed to share some cooperation. a figure that is hard to get into work, even to meet and to discuss something. I think to the extent that sometimes people are evading me for reasons. for sure, it is because I couldn't barge.
Even so, I always want to say sorry for every single moments wasted by thinking about my absence despite I am present. Apologizing for every time you thought I am useless and jobless. pardon for the second thought you were having whether you are excluding my name and write it back on the basis of humanty and pity. I am sorry, really sorry.
reading about degree life, there are tips to avoid free riders. i don't want people to blacklist me because I am shit. It is just that I do works only when I am asked to. If this is meant to change, sure I am fine with that. but please don't be quiet and then suddenly reporting me of didn't even lend a hand. I have almost every social platforms except bigo and tinder. and I read everything, don't worry.
regarding my performance last season, I was only too shy to ask for my groupmate's opinion upon my productivity. I think everyone is aware of me facing a change of heartbeat when it comes to bargaining something with different gender. I am just too shy, oh come on. I can't describe or rate myself or else it will become a biased memoir.
I also encountered nervous when conveying speeches. It is just that I can't translate everything from malay to english swiftly. Even google translate works with internet! I hope I can face all these kinds of hindrances for another four years. And yeah, no more free riders.
Again, I am sorry for every negative things that had happened in foundation. to everyone that was unhappy with me, to every marks deducted courtesy to me, I am really really to the third really, sorry.
greetings. great things.