Experiences

Visions of Glory

A History and a Memory of Jehovah’s Witnesses

by BARBARA GRIZZUTI HARRISON

A guest writes about Visions of Glory:

That marvelous book of hers, VISIONS OF GLORY, could very well have saved my life, more than once. Back in 1980, when I was, for the first time, studying VERY earnestly, my dad met me for dinner and brought up the subject of JWs. He and my mother were quite opposed and beyond frustrated, their bratty 23 year old daughter thinking she had ALL the answers. To make a long story short, he handed me this book!!! I never thought to ask him who recommended it, etc.

Once I started reading, I couldn't stop, even as I found myself saying "baloney!", "not true!", "she's wrong!". She is such an excellent writer!!! I talked to my "friends" at the Kingdom Hall about this "disturbing" book, which they, naturally, attributed to Satan; still, I couldn't stop reading. So many of the words of ex-witnesses could have written by me; I'm getting choked up as I recall, more than 20 years later (I haven't seen the book for about half that long; my copy fell apart after repeat readings, and then I took it out of the library for the last time 10 years ago when I was a couple of months away from my baptism date), the story of the young Puerto Rican man breaking down in tears when asked how he felt at the thought of loved ones being destroyed at Armageddon (I hope you've read the book!)....and the young Russian woman named Vera, and the anonymous woman who expressed her feelings by saying, "all of a sudden I have these heavy questions....", "why DOES God permit suffering? Why, if he loves?", "Maybe God HAS taken his spirit away from me....."

Anyway, I ended my association not long after reading THAT BOOK! After LOTS of tears, nightmares, talks with elders, etc.

Fast forward to 1987, newly married, restless, longing for "spiritual fulfillment" that I didn't find in my marriage; started studying again, stopped, started, got THAT BOOK out of the library, then, BAM! She's OUT, AGAIN, score one for SATAN!!!! :)

Now to 1990; ecstatic new mother, desperate to stay married though I was miserable with my then-husband, turned to God, which I still thought was with the Witnesses, if he even existed. I got wrapped up in a study, meetings, etc., even though I came home in tears after repeatedly witnessing episodes of children being spanked, slapped, etc., trying with all my might to believe that God would give me the strength to die, or let my son die, before accepting a blood transfusion (I was thankful that my son's dad was "opposed", so that he could take over and authorize it, should my son EVER need it), hoping with all of me that my husband would cheat on me so that I could get a "scriptural" divorce, why, oh why did I need THAT BOOK??? Anyway, it was STILL in the Bloomfield library, waiting for me....

And that was the end of THAT!!! Oh, by the way, I got divorced very soon after leaving. FOR GOOD.

Until this past Sunday (1/14), when a lovely couple came knocking at my door, and I actually, for a number of reasons, felt a spark of interest; now that we have the internet, I don't need to stop at the library. Here you are!!!!!

And here I am to THANK YOU!! And Barbara, do you know how I can reach her, or can you pass this along to her???

I'm so sorry that my dad passed away without my asking him where he heard about that splendid book!!!!

Sincerely, Ellen

SIMON AND SHUSTER NEW YORK

This is copyrighted material used by permission of Barbara G. Harrison.

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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Without the support and generosity of friends and colleagues, and without the gift of time and space provided by the MacDowell Colony, I could not have written this book.

For trusting me enough to share intimate details of their lives, I thank David Maslanka, Walter Szykitka--and others who are unnamed, but not unloved. My debt to them is very great.

For the invaluable information and advice they gave so freely, I thank Bernard and Charlotte Atkins, Leon Friedman, Ralph deGia, Father Robert Kennedy, Jim Peck.

For their creative research and editorial assistance, I thank Tonia Foster and Paul Kelly-and the librarians at the Brooklyn Public Library, who eased their task.

For their perceptive insights and criticism, which helped me to understand not only my subject, but myself and my past, I thank Sheila Lehman, Tom Wilson, Sol Yurick, L. L. Zeiger, and David Zeiger.

No words can express my gratitude to the members of my family who always listened, even when their patience was sorely tried, and who were emotional bulkwarks when I was sorely tried: Carol Grizzuti, Dominick Grizzuti, Richard Grizzuti; and my children (who managed, with grace, to live with my obsessions), Anna and Joshua Harrison.

For Father Michael Crimmins, Alice Hagen, and Rose Moss, who gave me a very special kind of encouragement at a very crucial time, I have love and regard.

And finally, I thank and esteem my editor, Alice E. Mayhew, for her good counsel and her good work.

(Throughout this book, I have changed names and identities to protect the privacy of those concerned.)

This book is for Arnold Horowitz.