(Updated 2001 Oct 30)
The Wisdom of Chris
Chris, in reference to this quote page:
"This page makes me sound like a complainer!"
"I'm becoming a mute."
That's just wrong. I'm tired. Ohh, my back. I don't want to be here. I don't do stairs. I should become a gigolo while I still have hair. I think we should just let some more people die. I want anarchy! Half the commandments are bunk. The Catholic church thinks if they beat it into you, you'll actually believe it. I do not have prejudices that are negative! I wonder if I can get a handicapped permit because I'm lazy. I don't see anything wrong with greed. There are always suicides. Who cares? Go ahead! I hate people. It's all <insert name>'s fault. I believe there are certain rules to desserts. I can do no wrong. I don't allow people to blame anything on me. I don't believe in sins. I can go anywhere I damn well please! I like to have *everyone* suffer. It's more fun that way. My tolerance has been pretty low lately. I'm offended by that. You should never give someone an unloaded gun to play with. I am not a bad influence on anybody. Nobody should hate me. I'm great! [On apartments without air conditioning] I die just walking to the car! I'm saintly. Nobody can ignore me. I like to rain on everybody's parade. If I watched my comments, I'd never speak. They think I'm negative. I think masses of people should be following me blindly. CAS: Sometimes it sucks to be white. TRS: Sure you get elected to public office easily... CPM: ...but you [sun] burn and you have no rhythm. NRF: Gosh, this seems too organized for us. CPM: Then it probably is. CPM: My back hurts. It's not from exercise. TRS: Maybe it's from *lack* of exercise. CPM: I wonder if veal feels like this. NRF: That would be a real bummer not to be able to go outside. CPM: Depends who you are. NRF: You used to be so nice. Now you're so mean. TRS: It's Chris's fault. CPM: Yeah, I have that effect on people. TRS: "A mind is a terrible thing to waste." CPM: It depends how you waste it. NRF: Costco is pretty convenient. CPM: Except for the walking. CPM: I want everyone to spell everything my way. TRS: You're going to have to take over the world. CPM: I'm working on that. NRF: I don't know what men require. CPM: Food. TRS: Water. CPM: A TV controller. NRF: You have to take every positive thing that comes your way. CPM: Especially out of *my* mouth. TRS: I'm glad you think you're funny. CPM: Well, I have to amuse myself somehow.
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