TUESDAY, OCTOBER 12TH: Top of the fourth inning: Little Houses on the Prairie clinging to a 10-0 lead against the Cleveland Indians in Game 5 of the American League Divison Series. The Houses' skipper replaces starting pitcher Sean O'Hare with previously out-of-action pitcher Eugene Han. From my shortstop position I can see Euge gripping the ball in his glove oddly, holding the softball in a claw-like fashion. Wait, it isn't...As his pitch arcs towrds home plate, I see that it has a slow, sideways, tumbly rotation. Oh no, he's throwing knuckleballs! Euge closed the game preserving his and Sean's 15-0 shut out over the DPhers. After playing two of the tougher teams in our previous games, we beat up on a not-very-good-team to win our first game not by forfeit. The defense: P: Sean O'Hare, Eugene "K-ball" Han (4th) C: Eric Bone 1B: Matt Drowns 2B: Jeanine Sparks-Hinterneder 3B: Euge, Sean SS: me LF: John Slonimsky CF: Jeff Wiltse RF: Linus Gorlitz Attendance: 0.5. Paid attendance: 0. The major accomplishment of the game was even having a game. Three of our infield starters were absent, as was our backup rightfielder, but Euge, Sean, and Jon Mead materialized out of nowhere. Also, our opponents, the DPhers, had been prone to forfeit losses this season. 3B Teddy Cheung and SS Jeff Fasick were out for work-related reasons (I imagine), and 2B Jenny Mehren and RF Dave Wedaman missed the game after having given BLOOD. Trying to weigh the morality of donating blood on a game day, I have to refer to the Book of Armaments*, which says, "If thou must shed blood, be it someone else's." After batting around in the bottom of the first, intramural coordinator decreed that we would each take no more than one turn at bat per inning rather than get our allotted three outs. The game felt more like batting practice than a game. I didn't even know we had the shutout until I signed the scoresheet. WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 13: Attendance was going to be a potential problem again, as the neuroscientists were planning on attending a seminar given by Barry Manilow** on long-term potentiation. However, the shortage of infielders the previous day gave rise to an excess when Jeff F. and Teddy returned. P: Eugene Han, me (4th), Sean O'Hare (6th) C: Eric Bone 1B: Matt Drowns 2B: Teddy Cheung, Jeanine Sparks 3B: me, Teddy, Euge LF: Sean, Teddy CF: Jeff Wiltse, me RF: Linus Gorlitz For the second day in a row, everyone batted in the top of the first. We never really looked back. Players for 104 -- named in honor of the Physical Biochemistry course*** -- were disappearing to unknown commitments, so our players were working double-shifts. The normally surehanded Matt Drowns, for example, gave lefthanded thirdbaseman a bad name by muffing two balls playing for 104 after having robbed 104 of two hits playing first base for us. The final score was: Houses, 14; One-Zero-four, 4. We end the season with a 3-2 record, including one forfeit win. Only two teams will have made the playoffs, and as it happens they're the two teams that beat us. If we hit like we did in our last two games in our two losses, we possibly could have reversed the outcome of one or both games and snuck into the playoffs. Oh well. Defensive Plays of the Week: -- catcher Eric Bone, pouncing on a foul pop-up which didn't have much hang time. One of the DPhers' two big guys was at the plate at the time. I don't know if the hitter was actually good, but he was big enough to be a cause for concern. --shortstop Jeff Fasick, going to his right, fielding a high hop, setting his feet, and making an accurate throw to first. If I may blaspheme (some more), Nomar Garciaparra often makes routine plays *look* spectacular by not setting his feet and throwing off-balance. That being said, bloopers made up most of the week's superlatives: --Darren Lewis Award for Baserunning: Eric. On a close play at second, the DPhers secondbaseman thought Eric was out. Eric, the trusting soul that he is, overran second base and didn't bother to retreat to the base when he heard the 'out' call from our opponent. After multiple pleas from the sideline to get back on the base, Eric got the offical word from the umpire that he was safe and put his foot on the base. --Marv Throneberry**** Award for Attention Span: John Slonimsky. On a line-drive single to left field, it was clear the ball was going to make it over the infield. From my shortstop position, I saw John not reacting to the ball, and turned to Euge at third to check that Euge didn't in fact have a chance to get the ball. He didn't, and I turned back towards John, who eventually had a look of shocked realization (i.e. "Oh no! My Roast!") and flagged down the hit. Perhaps this is how John received the nickname JoSlo. Nomar Garciaparra Award for Fidgeting: Euge, in the batters box, kicking the dirt like a horse with each practice swing. I offered Euge my batting gloves to use just to see if he compulsively adjusts them. He declined. Purple Heart for Foolhardiness: Euge again. After Dave Wedaman and Jenny Mehren bailed on Tuesday's game (having given blood) Euge showed up on Wednesday with a fresh bandage on his left (i.e. non-throwing) arm. Euge handled what balls were hit to him flawlessly and didn't pop up, so I'm thinking we ought to take blood from him before every game. -Tapu Footnotes: * cf. Search for the Holy Grail. The actual passage regarded the instructions for the Holy Hand Grenade. ** Wednesday's 4:00 seminar was given by Roberto Malinow. *** 104 is named after the players' housing facility, probably in Grad. ****Throneberry was the first baseman for the 1962 Mets, who lost 120 games. Holding a runner on first, Throneberry almost had his head taken off by a pickoff throw because he wasn't paying attention.