2020-02-28 Conflict
2. Participant Contact List
*Edwin Rutsch, SF Bay Area XR, CA, XR Empathy Work Group, EdwinRutsch@gmail.com
*Karolina Kubiak, XR Trójmiasto/Poland, XR Empathy Work Group,
*Bill Filler, SF Bay Area, XR Empathy Work Group, s
*Marta Neto, XR Cork, XR Ireland
Grace Bergey,Orange County, Ca.
Jonathan “JLo” Logan, Portland, OR, USA, XR America,
Andy Philpott XR Nonviolence + Deescalation, XR Tower Hamlets,
Michelle Wehner, Eugene OR, XR America
James Green, Syracuse NY, NVC Fuck You, Everyone Shut Up,
Bob Brown, Thousand Oaks, Calif.,
Empathy Circle #1: Facilitator: Karolina
Johnathan
Didn’t have good listening background growing up.
Tries to be a good listener and see the important.. Sees that there is a lot of conflict in XR, instead of working on the issue.
I want to be clear on how much time in XR USA is being spent on conflict, scapegoating. Not on the
My goal is learning about the Empathy Circle is a safe place and process to off load tensions and conflicts so we can focus on addressing the climate problem.
I need to learn this skill so I can be proficient and be a resource.
Karolina
Phone is a soft ending.
Feeling tired.
Feeling excited about something related to conflict
IST Regenerative culture working Group is being asked for help with conflict.
In the IST Regen group there is a lot about Dominc Barter RC.
Most documents regarding conflict are about RC.
I would like to implement into real situations.
Edwin ideas
Empathy circle as core process
Some differences between EC and RC. do empathy circles as a practice before doing RC.
Can be used for the social divisions.
thrilled about Jonathan support and vision of the empathy circle.
Spread empathy circles widely in XR
People do just move on but need to practice.. Make it a practices.
Jonathan
Feeling thankful and grateful.. Glad to have a take away the EC has different uses.
Conflict, support, individually, at the beginning of meetings.
Good tool for friends and family
This is an important piece for addressing social polarization.
This is core life skill.
This could radically change our politics, instead of being around conflict it could be around empathy.
How could this be packaged for XR that this could be a core of XR chapters.
Wants to package up these tools for XR groups.
It’s foundational for relationships. How to use it there.
Mary Anne
Had some success during the week.
Call from XR person about using Empathy Circles.
Suggested to person to watch videos and to take part.
It is important to do it as a practice..
Not just to learn it but to make a habit of practice.
I encouraged her to take part in this circle. But they work and can’t take part.
The practice can change the attitude and the energy of the meeting.
The facilitator has a role in bringing that empathic attitude to the meeting.
Karolina
Edwin
Add notes to this page.
Empathy contributes to the betterment of humanity.
Mary Anne
Have some much I want to respond to.
Gave a suggestion to XR person that came to me. for
organizing a meeting
Talking about your values
About stopping the meeting around conflict. Two things come up. What is conflict? It is a question mark.
1. Someone brought up something that they thought was a conflict.
2. Conflict affects the whole. So to have an empathy circle process could be very useful.
I’m thinking that the notion of conflict and an understanding of the issue of conflict may need attention.
Got excited about one of the federal condiates of a green candidates. Have an idea of door knocking for inviting people into an empathy circle.
The XR person has the role of addressing the conflict in XR Calgary
Jonathan
Enjoying being in my upper 50’s.. Being clear on what I value. I want to make a difference for the larger community.
For me it is a feeling of wholeness when I can contribute. I feel part of the whole human family when I can contribute.
I feel personally fulfilled when I contribute to the betterment of humanity.
Working with XR I feel there are multiple layers of purpose and values.
Karolina
Found it interesting that Jonathan the feeling good when we contribute to the whole of humanity
The feeling of contribution to the well being of others.
People struggle or feel too small to have this feeling.
I wonder if I contribute? How do I stop feeling too small to contribute? I need to feel that small things I do matter. I don’t feel that the small things I do matter. Every small thing I do matter.
Mary Anne
I get very excited by Eugine Gendlin process. I took a phone course. You can’t just listen to it.. You need to have a partner. Someone that is present that listens. It is experiential..
Eugine Gendlin talks about the larger system and a whole.. We are all connected. We are accessing our inner feeling connection to larger system. By connecting to the feeling of the whole, - we are interacting first. So becoming more aware of that, really helps our listening.
We are the interactions.
Being aware of it on the inside. Not thinking of it but having our brain connect with the experience from the inside. Relates to feeling good with the wholeness that Jonathan was talking about.
We can live like that and live in the process.
Karolina
Interesting to ask; What is conflict?
People are sensors of a problem. The person is a sensor of the issue and to deal with it.
How we treat conflict. Depends on how we settle it.
If our attitude is that the person who is bringing up the problem.. They are saying they smell
Redefining conflict. Making a positive attitude.. Trusting what is happening. Trust that everyone has a good will. There is not a conflict with that attitude. Looking with curiosity, it not a conflict
Jonathan
Are part of XR USA,
Having an aha moment on dealing with conflict.. There is no conflict between XR US and XR America.
I have a new perspective. XR US and XR America issues.
I was seeing their conflict with us.. There is something to work on collaboratively.
I felt before that I understood empathy … now I have more experience and see it as a tremendous capacity
Brain is like popping corn.. A joyous and exciting experience.
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Empathy Circle #3: Facilitator: Marta