The D and P Shanty Folk Song Calypso Blues

D and P Shanty Folk Song Calypso Blues by Phil Poyser (2016)

To the tune of "A Boy Named Sue as sung by Johnny Cash"

It's Friday night at the D and P
and I've brought along some poetry.
Forgot my old guitar, but emptied a bottle of booze.
To my odes and rhymes, don't be averse.
'cos I just might sing which would be worse!
I got the D and P shanty, folk song, calypso blues.

Chorus: Please don't sing, Phil. Oh, please don't sing etc.
It's not your bag and it's not your thing.
We've just one plea, just one request you know you can't refuse.
Your range is small and you'll be off key.
We'd rather listen to your poetry.
We've got the D and P shanty, folk song, calypso blues.

We've had Dave and Andy, Kate, Jo and Pete.
( or on 25th. March) We've had Dave and Andy, Pete, Pete and Pete.
It's time for me to get up on my feet.
Still thumbing through my file and wond'ring which piece to choose.
I stumble up, get adrenaline rush.
The room goes quiet. There's an awful hush.
I get the D and P shanty, folk song, calypso blues.

Chorus: Please don't sing, Phil. Oh, please don't sing etc.
I stutter, stall, get words in a twist.
I've drunk too much beer, just slap my wrist.
Eyelids are flutt'ring and one or two are beginning to snooze.
At the D and P, we love our folk,
so I won't come back till my voice has broke.
I got the D and P shanty, folk song, calypso blues.

Chorus: Please don't sing, Phil. Oh, please don't sing etc.

So that's all, my friends, now I'll make way
for one of you who can sing and play.
I'll stick to Dizzy Blonde and other alcoholic brews.
So who's up next, Pete? Who did you choose?
I'm off to concentrate on the booze,
'cos I got D and P shandy, folk song, calypso blues.

Please don't sing, Phil. Oh, please don't sing.
It's not your bag. It's not your thing.
We've just one plea, just one request you know you can't refuse.
Your range is small. You'll be off key.
We'd rather listen to your poetry.
We've got the D and P shanty, folk song, calypso blues.

© Phil Poyser, Macclesfield, 24th./25th. January, 2016