As we approached the end of an unforgettable year, we asked our students about their hopes and goals for 2021.

How are you feeling as we approach the end of the year 2020?

• Caleb: Excited that this year is over. I am feeling good because I had a great school year.

• Charlie: I am feeling very happy that 2020 is almost over.

• Charles: Good!

• Quinn: I’m feeling okay as we approach the end of 2020.

• Gilian: I will always cherish 2020 because I got to spend a lot of time with my dog, Milo, who is very sick.

• Alex: Happy and excited.

• Liam: I am feeling good. The year 2020 was my favorite. I did really good at it.

• Yulissa: A little nervous but also a little excited.

• Luke: I am excited for the next year.

What are your hopes for the year 2021?

• Caleb: Going to meet new people and going to New York.

• Charlie: I hope we can get control of the virus and move on with our normal lives, not the new normal lives that the virus brought to us.

• Charles: I hope COVID-19 will be over.

• Quinn: I hope that this COVID-19 pandemic will end in 2021. I hope to get new passports once this pandemic is over so my family can go to Italy for my parents 25th anniversary. And I hope to go back to Lake Forest College to work out before the end of this school year.

• Gillian: Get back to in person learning.

• Alex: Go to school more.

• Liam: I hope in 2021 I will have a good time. I hope to do a book on tape, walk my dog and plant flowers.

• Yulissa: I am not sure. I want to stay home after I turn 22.

• Luke: I hope that the Corona virus goes away so that we can go back to school.

What are some goals that you have set for yourself to achieve in 2021?

• Caleb: My goal for 2021 is to have fun and have a great time in New York.

• Charlie: I guess when the virus is over, a goal I have is to try and hang out with more friends and family who I haven’t seen in a while.

• Charles: Getting my license.

• Quinn: Some goals that I have set for myself to achieve in 2021 are to level up in Reading Plus and finish one of my online courses.

• Gillian: Going back to Wagner Farm.

• Alex: Find a job and meet my friends.

• Liam: I will graduate in 2021. I will stay at home. I hope to have a job at Homegoods or Silo. I’m good at putting the silverware together. I like to clean the tables. I like to clean the menus.

• Yulissa: I want to be able to write an email or letter.

• Luke: I want to make new friends next year.

*Please watch for emails from the district with potential updates and further communication about the return to In-Person Learning for second semester.

If you have questions about testing or our health and safety protocols, please visit The Map or contact Mr. Lane Linder (llinder@lfschools.net) who leads risk mitigation for District 115.

Liam will be graduating in February. While we will be sad to see him go, we know he has a wonderful support system and will continue to learn and grow. We asked him to spend some time reflecting on his last three years at Transition.

Showing Up

Happy New Year! A new year can bring excitement and anticipation. For many, it is a time to set goals for ourselves of things we want to accomplish, something we want to improve on, or a new activity or interest we’d like to pursue. But as life happens, it can be hard to stick to our goals and keep our promises to ourselves. Sometimes we get frustrated with ourselves and those around us when we ‘fall short’ of our expectations. This year, we face the added challenge of an ongoing pandemic, continued restrictions as a result, and overall fatigue as things still feel far from returning to normal. How can we reconcile our hopes and expectations for ourselves with the reality of bumps, setbacks, and sometimes the downright impossibility of the things we set out to do?

In her book Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead, Brene Brown writes, “sometimes the bravest and most important thing you can do is just show up.” ‘Showing up’ for our young adults can have a huge positive impact, which is important now more than ever. It also frees us from having to have the ‘right’ answer or to be ‘perfect’ in meeting our standards for ourselves. So what does showing up look like? How can we show up for our young adults and, in doing so, model for them how they can show up for others? Some key ideas to think about are safe, seen, and soothed.

Safe: Part of showing up for others lies in being an ‘emotionally safe space’. Practicing self-care, including some of the strategies in last month’s newsletter, helps us to manage stress and be more emotionally regulated in our interactions with others. We also need to be able to give our undivided attention (i.e. time without phone, computer, or other distractions) for important conversations. This might mean ‘rescheduling’ a conversation to a time when undivided attention can be given. While in an ideal world, we would always respond to others in a regulated, supportive way, this is not a realistic expectation. It’s helpful to recognize that we can and will ‘lose it’ sometimes. When that happens it’s an opportunity to model for our young adults how to make it right and then forgive ourselves and move on. It’s amazing how powerful it can be for our young adults to receive an acknowledgement that we made a mistake and a sincere apology.

Seen: We help our young adults feel seen when we acknowledge the feelings they are having as real and valid. They might not be the same feelings we would have in response to a particular event or set of circumstances - and that’s okay. Sometimes it can be helpful to label the emotion that’s being experienced. Avoid statements that minimize or shame feelings (e.g. “it’s not that big of a deal.” or “Why would you feel like that? That’s silly.”). However, if a young adult is having a reaction that is unexpectedly large for the situation or doesn’t seem to take into account the feelings of others, it’s okay to guide consideration of the true size of the problem and/or perspective taking. In transition, our young adults have been introduced to social thinking concepts and emotional regulation tools that help to frame these conversations - please reach out if you would like some of these materials for home.

Soothed: While all feelings are real and valid, some emotional states make it harder to problem-solve or focus on what needs to be done. When this occurs, young adults may need to be guided to use their tools to return to a more calm state. Everyone’s ‘toolbox’ looks different but may include things like taking a walk (or other form of exercise), time with a pet, listening to music, watching a funny show or video for a brief distraction, or just venting about the problem (before efforts are made to solve it). Some Transition students have begun working with the Zones of Regulation curriculum, which teaches understanding and acceptance of different emotional states while at the same time exploring tools that are effective at each ‘zone’ of emotions. Some of these tools will be highlighted in subsequent newsletters, but feel free to reach out if you would like more information sooner.

As with most things, ‘showing up’ is about progress, not perfection and we can help each other along the way. If you would like more information about some of the tools mentioned or I can support you or your young adult in another way, please contact me. I can always be reached at klapinski@lfschools.net or 224-217-3253.

Each month we like to share various helpful resources for parents of our transition students. If you have any questions or know of a resource we may share for the next month, don't hesitate to contact your class teacher or the Transition Coordinator.