Sometimes it isn’t clear if what is happening at home is domestic abuse. But, you are in a relationship with someone, or if someone living in your home uses bullying, threats or violence, it can make you feel unsafe and could be a sign of domestic abuse.
What is domestic abuse?
Domestic abuse is sometimes called ‘domestic violence’ and it can involve someone threatening, bullying or hurting another person in their family or who they’re in a relationship with.
Here are common signs of a physically or emotionally abusive relationship:
kicking, punching, hitting
threatening to kill someone or hurt them
controlling behaviour, like telling someone where they can go and what they can wear
controlling someone’s finances by withholding money or stopping someone going to work
making someone feel guilty, criticising them or making them feel small and stopping them from standing up for themselves
reading emails, text messages or letters
making someone do something sexual when they don’t want to.
Domestic abuse can happen inside and outside of the home, it can happen over the phone or online using the internet or social media. It can happen in any relationship and in any family and can continue once a relationship is over.
Some useful resources:
Abusive Relationships Knowledge Organiser - A handout that brings together all the key information about what might make a relationship abusive and how you can get support if you experience this.
Consent Knowledge Organiser - A handout that brings together all the key information about consent and who you can turn to for help with this.
Childline - Link to the Childline website where you can find information and support on any issues that are worrying you, including abuse in relationships.
Disrespect NoBody - Link to the Disrespect NoBody website where you can find information about sexting, relationship abuse, consent, rape, porn, and harrassment.
National Domestic Abuse Hotline - Link to the National Domestic Abuse Hotline website where you can find more information about what domestic abuse is, how to spot it and how to stop it.
Anyone can be forced into marriage, no matter their age, gender, ethnicity, or religion.
A forced marriage happens when one or both people are made to marry against their will, often through pressure, threats, or abuse. It also includes cases where someone is made to marry before they turn 18, even if they’re not directly pressured or abused.
In the UK, forced marriage is illegal. It’s a type of abuse and a serious violation of human rights.
What is the Forced Marriage Unit?
(+44) (0) 207 008 0151 Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm
(+44) (0) 207 008 1500 Global Response Centre (out of hours)
email: fmu@fco.gov.uk
"I was 15 and just about to finish my GCSEs when I realised that dad was planning to send me abroad to marry my older cousin. Dad was angry all the time and sometimes hit me and my mum. Mum didn’t want me to get married so young, but she was too scared to say no to him. I thought dad might trick me into leaving the country and then take my phone off me so I couldn’t ask anyone for help."
Aisha told a teacher at her school, who called the Forced Marriage Unit.
The Forced Marriage Unit worked with children’s social care to obtain a Forced Marriage Protection Order, which was served on Aisha’s dad. The order prevented the forced marriage from taking place as Aisha’s father was unable to take Aisha out of the country and could not apply for a passport on her behalf.
Aisha was scared to stay at home so was given a safe foster placement temporarily. Aisha’s mum worked with children’s social care and was supported in leaving Aisha’s father.
Aisha now lives safely with her mum and younger brothers and was able to finish her GCSEs
“I was 25 when my parents took me to Pakistan for a family wedding. When I got there I discovered it was me who was getting married. I did not want to but my mum has lots of health problems and everyone said I was making her ill by refusing. After days of saying no I finally gave up and submitted to my family’s will. When I got back to the UK, I just tried to forget about it and get on with my life. Then my wife’s family started pressuring me to put in a visa application for her to come to the UK. They would call me and threaten me.”
Syed called the Forced Marriage Unit at the earliest opportunity and the Forced Marriage Unit were able to explain how they could assist him as he was a reluctant sponsor.
Additional resources:
What is Forced Marriage? - An easy-to-read leaflet about what forced marriage is and how you can get help if you are worried about this.
Karma Nirvana - A link to the Karma Nirvana website, where you can get help if you are worried about forced marriage or honour-based abuse.
Day one NY
Disrespect NoBody