Identity

Interpersonal communication is the study of how two people communicate in personal relationships (NCA, n.d.). Interpersonal communication starts with each of us. The development of our self-concept helps us to not only understand our ideas about self but also how we relate to the world around us. This module focuses on self-concept as well as theories and ideas related to our development of self-concept.

Defining Self-concept

The term self-concept (sometimes called identity) refers to your own ideas about who you are. Your self-concept develops and expands over time as you learn more about yourself and your motivations. While your self-concept is cultivated from early childhood, it continues to grow throughout your lifetime. At the same time, there are many dimensions to our self-concept.

If you were meeting someone for the first time, how would you introduce yourself? Maybe you would use one or more of the following phrases:

“My name is …(your name).” “I’m a …(your occupation).” “I’m from…(location).”

There are many ways you might describe yourself. Maybe you would focus on your background or experience. In another situation, you may focus on your hobbies and interests. Or maybe you would talk about something else entirely. It can be difficult to pin down who we are to a single answer. Is one answer more correct than another? Not necessarily, there are many aspects to each of us and all of these ideas may be true at the same time.

A term sometimes used to describe the various ideas we hold about ourselves is self-schema. A schema is a cognitive framework (idea or concept) that helps us to organize and interpret information about ourselves and the world around us. Our self-concept is made up of numerous self-schemas.

Let’s think about how this term works through social roles: You can be a son/daughter, a brother/sister, a father/mother, etc. all at the same time (each of these roles could be one aspect of your self-schema). All of these ideas can be true. Taken together, your self-schemas make up your self-concept.

Three components of self-concept

Another way to think about self-concept is through related terms. Humanistic psychologist, Carl Rogers (1959), defined self-concept using three distinct but related components: self-image, self-esteem and ideal self (Figure 1).

Figure 1: Rogers’ Three Components of Self-Concept

Your answer is your ideal self (at least at this moment). Our ideal self is who we want to be. We typically describe our ideal self in terms of our goals and ambitions in life. However, this concept is not static, meaning it can change over time as we change and grow.

The ideas we have about who we are (our self-concept) are a mixture of many things. The way we see ourselves (self-image), the way we evaluate ourselves in terms of others (self-esteem), and who we want to be (ideal self), all contribute to our understanding of self.

Self-concept Theories

A variety of scholars in psychology, sociology, and communication have researched self-concept. Their task is a difficult one because the self-concept is personal, dynamic and changes as we learn more about ourselves and the world around us. In this section, we will look at a few prominent theories and ideas from this area of research.

Johari Window

What do we know about ourselves? What aspects of ourselves do we share with others? What aspects of ourselves are yet to be determined? In 1955, psychologists Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham created a model known as the Johari window to visually represent the aspects of self that are known to us versus those that are unknown to us. Their model has four quadrants (Figure 2).

In the first quadrant (upper, left-hand corner) are those ideas that are known to self and others. This quadrant is considered the open area and likely includes ideas like your name, hobbies and other topics about yourself that you freely share with others. If you have a social media account, the messages you post publicly would fall into this quadrant.

In the second quadrant (upper, right-hand corner) are those ideas that are unknown to self but known to others. This quadrant is considered the blind area. This area might be easier to think about in terms of others. Do you have a friend, co-worker or sibling who comes off abrasive but doesn’t know it? Or maybe you know someone who’s a pushover but doesn’t see it. Do you think that their lack of recognition affects their understanding of self? Now, let’s think about it in terms of ourselves. What are our blind spots? These aspects of our personality (that others readily known) but escape our notice fall into this area of the Johari window.

In the third quadrant (lower, left-hand corner) are those ideas that are known to self but unknown to others. This quadrant is considered the hidden area (it is titled ‘facade’ in Figure 2), and includes things you known about yourself that you do not share with others (i.e., traumas you’ve experience, emotional insecurities, embarrassing situations, etc.).

In the fourth quadrant (lower, right-hand corner) are those ideas that are unknown to self and others. This quadrant is considered the unknown area. This area includes things you and others don’t know (yet). How will you cope with the loss of a parent (if both your parents are living)? What type of parent will you be (if you don’t have children)? How successful will your career be (if you’re in school and having started your career yet)? Because these things haven’t happened yet, the outcome is unknown.

Figure 2: Johari Window

On the other hand, if your parents or guardians described you as “lazy” or “noncommunicative,” you may have believed those words too. Those words would also influence your self-concept.

Social Comparison Theory

When you think about your friends, how do you measure up? In your opinion, are you better (or worse) looking? Are you more (or less) successful? In what ways do you think you are better than your friends? In what ways are you worse off than your friends? In 1954, psychologist Leon Festinger suggested that we evaluate ourselves in comparison to others, and those judgments influence our self-concept. This idea is known as social comparison theory.

As with reflected appraisal, some people (those closest to us) influence our self-concept more than others. Upward social comparison occurs when we compare ourselves with those we see as better than us. These comparisons tend to focus on the desire to improve ourselves. Downward social comparison occurs when we compare ourselves with those we see as worse off than us. These comparisons often focus on making us feel better about ourselves and our abilities.

Self-fulfilling Prophecy

A self-fulfilling prophecy occurs when your expectation causes something to happen. Imagine Riley is preparing to ask someone he just met out for a date. Riley believes he will be rejected based on his previous experiences, but he decides he'll take a chance anyway. When approaching his friend, his shoulders are slumped and his head is down. Riley leaves his hands in his pockets as he says, "I know you're probably busy, but would you like to see a movie next weekend?" Just as he predicted, he is turned down.

This is an example of a self-imposed self-fulfilling prophecy. Riley's own beliefs influenced his prediction, which turned out to be true. His negative expectations affected his body language and the way he phrased his request.

Let's look at another example.

Suppose your friends stop by your apartment to tell you that a new person moved into the apartment down the hall. When you ask them what they thought of your new neighbor, they describe the person as aloof and rude.

Later in the day, you run into your new neighbor by the mailboxes. Based on the description you heard from your friends, you say “excuse me” in an aggressive manner and push your way into the space. In turn, your new neighbor gives you a harsh look and leaves quickly. The next time you see your friends, you tell them that you met your new neighbor and definitely agree with their assessment.

Was your new neighbor actually aloof and rude? Or, did you treat your new neighbor in a way that your preconceived notion would be fulfilled? If so, it is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Sometimes our expectations (or the expectations of others) can influence our communication behaviors. In the example above, the information you received from your friends influenced how you interacted with your new neighbor. How might things have been different if you didn’t know anything about your new neighbor before you met at the mailboxes? Would you have communicated in a more friendly manner? If you had, would your new neighbor have reacted differently? It’s difficult to say what would have happened. But, it’s important to remember that the feedback we receive about others may not be accurate. If we communicate with others based on inaccurate information, we may create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Conclusion

Trying to pinpoint who we are can be difficult. There are many aspects to our self-concept. In some cases, the aspects of self we present will depend on a variety of factors. In this module, we learned about different ways to think about self-concept and various people and situations that may influence the development of our ideas about self. We also learned about several theories and ideas related to our development of self-concept.

1. Johari Window

Ask the students to take out a sheet of paper, draw a square with four quadrants and label each quadrant (as described in the text). (Alternatively, the instructor could create a worksheet). Ask the students to spend a few minutes jotting down ideas about themselves that would fit into each category. (While they are discussing, draw a Johari window on the board large enough for students to enter information) After 10-15 minutes, have the students wrap up their thoughts, and then ask students to share and compare with classmates seated near to them. After, share and compare, then:

• Ask a member of each small group to enter in the Johari window drawn on the board common elements their group what they wrote down for a particular quadrant (or all four quadrants)

• Ask each group to report to the class how they made decisions about what should go where

Finish the activity by asking students what are their key takeaways about the Johari window and how it be used to better understand self-concept.

2. Reflected Appraisal

Ask students to brainstorm/write on the follow topic:

• Who has influenced your self-concept?

• In what ways?

Students can take this activity in a variety of directions. They could look at early influencers (such as parents or siblings) or later points in their life. While students are brainstorming, create two columns on the board: Column 1 Element of self-concept. Column 2 Who influenced it?

After 10-15 minutes, have students share and compare with small group of classmates seated near them. Ask a member of each group to write common elements from their group in each column. Finish the activity by asking students what are their key takeaways about reflected appraisal and how it be used to better understand self-concept.

3. Social Comparison

Ask students to discuss with small group seated near them, who do they (or others they know) use as social comparisons and what is compared. While students are discussing, make two columns on the board: Column 1 Who? Column 2 What? Ask a member of each group to write common elements from their group discussion under each column. Ask the class what are their key takeaways about social comparison and how it can be used to better understand self-concept.

Ask students to find a social setting where they can observe others (preferable in their peer group). Examples: at a coffee shop, bar, restaurant, etc. Ask them to observe the setting, people, etc. and jot down notes about what they are seeing. This observation should last for 30 minutes.

During the next class meeting, ask students to share what they observed. The instructor should write some of these ideas on the whiteboard. Once everyone is done offering their observations, ask them to think about how this information could be used as a social comparison.

Cherry, K. (2019, October 11). Reflected appraisal process and self concept. Very Well Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-the-reflected-appraisal-process-2795804.

Cooley, C.H. (1902). Human nature and the social order. Pantianos Classics.

Costabile, K.A., Shedlosky-Shoemaker, R., & Austin, A.B. (2018). Universal stories: How narratives satisfy core motives. Self & Identity, 17(4), 418-431.

Festinger, L. (1954). A theory of social comparison processes. Human relations, 7(2), 117-140.

Luft, J., & Ingham, H. (1955). The Johari window, a graphic model of interpersonal awareness. Proceedings of the Western Training Laboratory in Group Development. UCLA.

National Communication Association. (n.d.). What is communication? https://www.natcom.org/about-nca/what-communication.

Overall, N.C., & Fletcher, G.J.O. (2010). Perceiving regulation from intimate partners: Reflected appraisal and self-regulation processes in close relationships. Personal Relationships, 17(3), 433-456.

Rogers, C. (1959). A theory of therapy, personality, and interpersonal relationships as developed in the client-centered framework. In S. Koch (Ed.), Psychology: A story of a science (Vol. 3, pp. 184-256. McGraw-Hill.

Scharp, K.M., & Canfield, C. (2017). Irreplaceable: Exploring identity and relationships through the discussion of invaluable personal objects. Communication Teacher, 31(2), 107-111.

Shamoa-Nir, L. (2017). The window becomes a mirror: The use of the Johari Window model to evaluate stereotypes in intergroup dialogue in Israel. Israel Affairs, 23(4), 727-746.

Ideal self: Your conception of who you would like to be.

Johari Window: A framework for making sense of identity based on what one knows and how one believes that they are perceived.

Reflected appraisal: Describes the process by which our self-concept is affected by what other people think of us.

Schema: A cognitive framework (idea or concept) that helps us to organize and interpret information about ourselves and the world around us.

Self-concept: Ideas you have about who you are.

Self-esteem: How we evaluate ourselves and the value we place on that evaluation.

Self-fulfilling prophecy: When your expectation causes something to happen.

Self-image: The way we see ourselves.

Social comparison: The ways we evaluate ourselves in comparison to others and how those judgments influence our self-concept.

Johari window:

"Johari Window" by Spaynton is licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0