Self-regulation
What is Self- Regulation?
Self-regulation is the ability to control ones thoughts, emotions and behaviours. Good self-regulation skills allow us to maintain attention, plan effectively and solve problems. As children grow and their brains develop, they become better able to manage their thoughts, emotions and behaviours. The development of self-regulation skills starts from a very early age. As these skills are practised they form pathways in the brain which increase a child's ability to manage stress and times of dysregulation more effectively.
Why is the Ability to Self- Regulate Important?
These skills help us to lead a balanced life and have positive relationships with others. Self-regulation affects health and wellbeing in both the short and long term. Good self-regulation skills can also be a predictor of how well children perform in school and further education. By teaching children and young people to be better self-regulators, we can improve their chances of being healthier, having better relationships with peers and teachers, and help them cope with stressful situations.
How does Self-Regulation Develop?
Self-regulation develops gradually from infancy, and with lots of support from trusted adults. Children learn to self-regulate through the adults around them responding to them in a way that meets their needs and makes them feel safe, from feeding them when they are hungry to soothing them when they cry. Self-regulation skills continue to develop through adults modelling appropriate responses and supporting children to navigate new experiences. There are a number of ways to promote the development of self-regulation skills. Below are some simple ways to get started.
Scaling Resources
Scaling resources provide a visual representation of the difference between emotional states (such as happy, worried, angry) and behavioural states (such as calm, agitated, out of control). These tools support children and young people to make sense of abstract ideas. By drawing a child's attention to where they are on their scale, you not only support their understanding of different emotions, but you can then support them to try strategies to help them move back down the scale. Find further information on one such resource, the Incredible 5-Point Scale
The 3 R's
Consider Bruce Perry's 3 R's - Regulate - Relate - Reason to prioritise regulation and allow an individual to feel supported when they are experiencing challenging emotions. Click to find out more info on this topic in another section of our Digital Hub
Role Play
Roleplay is fun! Most children love to use their imagination. Children and young people can explore situations that they are likely to come across in real life. Roleplay allows children to investigate and explore new scenarios. Older children and young people can use roleplay to reflect and learn. For younger children, games such as animal walks, Simon says, and clapping rhythms are all great ways to build skills in regulation. For older learners role card activities can be found here. .
Calming Techniques
Build a bank of calming strategies that help to reset the body into a relaxed and focused state. Try activities from listening to music or quiet time under a blanket, to kids yoga or breathing techniques. Mindfulness techniques such as Breathwork can be a simple way to start. Click to find out more info on this topic in another section of our Digital Hub.
Aberdeen City Council's Family Learning Team also have some great suggestions to promote relaxation in families.
"Name it to Tame it"
Research has shown that when children can name their emotions, it helps to soothe the brain and calm the body down. This is a vital foundation in developing self-regulation skills. Click to find out more info on this approach in the Emotion Coaching section of our Digital Hub. Try modelling appropriate emotional language by naming your own emotions for your child, or discussing the emotions of characters in a film or book.
Grounding Techniques
Use grounding techniques to help reset sensory systems when children are in hyper aroused states. Activities such as deep pressure, pulling/pushing, jumping, silly walks and swinging can be very effective at allowing our systems to reorganise and calm. See the clip above from NHS Grampian for more information.