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Mindfulness and Emotional Intelligence
Mindfulness and Emotional Intelligence
POSTED MARCH 26, 2019
Among its many benefits, mindfulness* helps us improve our emotional intelligence**. The way it accomplishes this seemingly difficult task was the subject of two recent (or recently updated) posts - at the Psychology Today and at Positive Psychology websites.
Among its many benefits, mindfulness* helps us improve our emotional intelligence**. The way it accomplishes this seemingly difficult task was the subject of two recent (or recently updated) posts - at the Psychology Today and at Positive Psychology websites.
Dan Mager, posting at Psychology Today, discusses the deleterious effects of negative childhood attachment experiences and observes that "many of the beneficial effects of mindfulness and meditation bear a remarkable resemblance to the characteristics of people who grow up with healthy, attuned attachments." Mager makes an unusual analogy between computer hardware, operating systems, and software, on the one hand, and human neural hardware and the ways we can "upgrade our internal operating system." It's a stretch, but he makes some interesting and helpful points:
Dan Mager, posting at Psychology Today, discusses the deleterious effects of negative childhood attachment experiences and observes that "many of the beneficial effects of mindfulness and meditation bear a remarkable resemblance to the characteristics of people who grow up with healthy, attuned attachments." Mager makes an unusual analogy between computer hardware, operating systems, and software, on the one hand, and human neural hardware and the ways we can "upgrade our internal operating system." It's a stretch, but he makes some interesting and helpful points:
Mindfulness can upgrade your internal operating system by helping to make the unconscious conscious and create the space for reasoned and skillful responses, even in the face of highly charged feelings.
Mindfulness promotes emotional regulation and mitigates impulsivity by increasing the gap between stimulus (what happens to us) and response (what we do with what happens to us).
Part of how mindfulness practice upgrades your internal operating system is by increasing emotional intelligence - a range of internal and interpersonal skills that can be acquired and improved with practice. Emotional intelligence requires effective communication between the rational-logical part of the brain—the prefrontal cortex—and the emotional part of the brain-centered in the amygdala within the limbic system. Mindfulness is a bridge that connects these two areas of the brain, and consistent practice of these skills builds new neural pathways that over time become stronger and more efficient.
Mike Oppland at Positive Psychology summarizes three elements of emotional intelligence - emotional awareness ("being aware of the emotions you are experiencing, as well as those of people around you"), application ("proactively apply your emotions into your everyday life instead of allowing your emotions to engulf your thinking" ) and management ("taking responsibility and learning to control the relationship you have with your emotions...respecting the emotions of the people around you and being able to uplift those around when needed").
Mike Oppland at Positive Psychology summarizes three elements of emotional intelligence - emotional awareness ("being aware of the emotions you are experiencing, as well as those of people around you"), application ("proactively apply your emotions into your everyday life instead of allowing your emotions to engulf your thinking" ) and management ("taking responsibility and learning to control the relationship you have with your emotions...respecting the emotions of the people around you and being able to uplift those around when needed").
Summarizing a 2015 research paper***, Oppland writes that mindfulness meditation helps manifest emotional intelligence in three major ways:
Summarizing a 2015 research paper***, Oppland writes that mindfulness meditation helps manifest emotional intelligence in three major ways:
It improves your ability to comprehend your own emotions.
It helps you learn how to recognize the emotions of other people around you.
It strengthens your ability to govern and control your emotions.
Mindfulness improves a person’s ability to use their emotions effectively by helping them determine which emotions are beneficial when undertaking certain activities.
Oppland provides an example of how to deal with negative emotions when you need to be productive by using mindfulness: "You can use your informal mindfulness practices at this moment to tune into your emotions and come back to the present moment. From this time, after a few mindful moments you are more likely to apply and manage your emotions effectively which will in turn improve your productivity when you return to work."
Oppland provides an example of how to deal with negative emotions when you need to be productive by using mindfulness: "You can use your informal mindfulness practices at this moment to tune into your emotions and come back to the present moment. From this time, after a few mindful moments you are more likely to apply and manage your emotions effectively which will in turn improve your productivity when you return to work."
He concludes: "Emotional intelligence is resourceful skill to develop in your life. It can help to ease relationships and provide a grounding element to emotional impulses....Mindfulness practices are useful in developing emotional intelligence by bringing awareness to your emotions and those of people around you. It can also help you to learn to apply and manage your emotions effectively through mindful thought and action."
He concludes: "Emotional intelligence is resourceful skill to develop in your life. It can help to ease relationships and provide a grounding element to emotional impulses....Mindfulness practices are useful in developing emotional intelligence by bringing awareness to your emotions and those of people around you. It can also help you to learn to apply and manage your emotions effectively through mindful thought and action."
*Mindfulness - the process of bringing one's attention to processes occurring in the present moment.
**See 13 traits of emotional intelligence from a previous post
***Peerayuth Charoensukmongkol, "Benefits of Mindfulness Meditation on Emotional Intelligence, General Self-Efficacy, and Perceived Stress"
Mindfulness Made Simple
Mindfulness Made Simple
POSTED JULY 18, 2019
I have been reading Brooke McAlary's "Slow", subtitled "simple living for a frantic world." Her chapter on mindfulness gives some of the clearest, most practical advice on the subject that I've seen. Mindfulness is a big business now with apps and courses that we can spend money on in the hope of becoming mindful persons. As McAlary reminds us, mindfulness is fundamentally paying attention, awareness, noticing things in the world and people around you, "tapping into the tiny details of life."
I have been reading Brooke McAlary's "Slow", subtitled "simple living for a frantic world." Her chapter on mindfulness gives some of the clearest, most practical advice on the subject that I've seen. Mindfulness is a big business now with apps and courses that we can spend money on in the hope of becoming mindful persons. As McAlary reminds us, mindfulness is fundamentally paying attention, awareness, noticing things in the world and people around you, "tapping into the tiny details of life."
The benefits for her living in a mindful manner were that she began to "experience more. More joy, yes, but also more realization, more discomfort, more pain, more bittersweetness" and that she "began engaging...really listening to what people say, considering what I was saying, and paying attention to what I was doing. I suddenly wanted more from life."
The benefits for her living in a mindful manner were that she began to "experience more. More joy, yes, but also more realization, more discomfort, more pain, more bittersweetness" and that she "began engaging...really listening to what people say, considering what I was saying, and paying attention to what I was doing. I suddenly wanted more from life."
I loved this passage: "If you don't know where to start, begin by noticing, wandering, exploring, and being filled with wonder. Once we start waking up, even the most mundane, everyday things can become miracles." (Sound familiar?)
I loved this passage: "If you don't know where to start, begin by noticing, wandering, exploring, and being filled with wonder. Once we start waking up, even the most mundane, everyday things can become miracles." (Sound familiar?)
McAlary writes that mindfulness can also be a specific activity, "something you enjoy doing for the escape it offers, for the sheer joy of it, for the sensations or the process." Her list of examples: "being creative, getting outside, growing something, doing nothing, practicing yoga, moving your body, deep breathing, taking stock of your senses, silent walking, noticing something you never noticed before, exercising, enjoying something beautiful, paying attention to the person you're with, laughing, absorbing the music, spreading kindness, smiling, exploring meditation."
McAlary writes that mindfulness can also be a specific activity, "something you enjoy doing for the escape it offers, for the sheer joy of it, for the sensations or the process." Her list of examples: "being creative, getting outside, growing something, doing nothing, practicing yoga, moving your body, deep breathing, taking stock of your senses, silent walking, noticing something you never noticed before, exercising, enjoying something beautiful, paying attention to the person you're with, laughing, absorbing the music, spreading kindness, smiling, exploring meditation."
Below - link to Brooke McAlary's podcast/blog on slow living
Excerpts from the mindfulness chapter of "Slow"
Excerpts from the mindfulness chapter of "Slow"
Doing nothing: "Fight the urge to connect to your phone and simply be. Be still and listen to your thoughts, feel your feeling, and recognize the urge to break the nothingness with action."
Taking stock of your senses: "What can you see right now...Look closer...What else? What can you hear? People talking, the whirr of computer hard drives?..Can you hear your own breath? Your own heartbeat? What can you feel? The seat under your butt? Is it hard or soft? The ground under your feet? Tension in your shoulders? What can you smell? Fresh air? Coffee?...What can you taste? By taking a few minutes to examine your senses, you bring yourself wholly into the present moment"
Silent walking: "There is constant stimulus in modern life, and the opportunity to let thoughts out rather than cramming more in is a rare one. By walking in silence, with no music, no podcasts, no audiobooks, we invite our thoughts to do their thing without impediment."
Noticing something you've never noticed before: "What is happening around you that you've never noticed before? This is an invitation to look a little deeper, pay a little more attention, remove the lens of sameness that the day in, day out routine places over our eyes."
Absorbing the music: "Good music can being you to tears. Find what you love and listen to it. Dance to it...Listen closely to it, and concentrate on what you hear - the lyrics, the changes in tempo, the different instruments, and the way they each contribute to a whole that is greater than the sum of its parts."
Attentiveness - "Focus"
Attentiveness - "Focus"
POSTED JUNE 22, 2021
Attentiveness is in short supply in a multi-tasking, multi-stimuli, multi-messaging world of cell phones, emails and social media. That's a shame because this valuable skill can make us more efficient, provide us with deeper experiences, and improve our relationships. Whether we are focusing on a task, enjoying a sunrise, or talking with a friend, attentiveness always improves the outcome.
The word "attentive" comes to us from Latin (ad tendere - to stretch toward) via the French (atendre - to direct one's mind or energies). The most basic way we exhibit attentiveness is when we focus on a task, deliberately eliminating distractions. Teachers and parents are often telling children to "pay attention." In many professions such as medical and engineering, attention to detail, the ability to focus, is an important and necessary quality.
From its original meaning of "focusing", attentiveness has also taken on the meaning of "awareness." To be attentive also means being aware of our environment, the people around us and our own internal emotions. We will take up attentiveness as awareness in a future post, but for now we turn our attention to attentiveness as focus.
Being attentive comes more easily for some than for others. It is estimated that up to 5% of US adults have attention deficit disorder, one of the more difficult forms of distraction. [1] But focusing is more difficult for all of us when we are stressed - i.e., "have a lot on my mind", and it was easier in earlier times without the ubiquitous presence of objects calling for our attention. There are steps we can take to help us achieve this basic form of attentiveness - the ability to concentrate on a task so that it can be completed more efficiently.
Psychology Today [2] provides some tips from the experts on how to focus better:
"Five more." Push yourself just a bit past your frustration level. Do five more minutes.
Drink water. Research with volunteers in a hot and humid environment showed that participants allowed to drink water did better on a series of memory and attention tests.
Take a walk, ideally near greenery. If you can't get out, looking at photos or videos of nature can help.
Meditate. [sidebar]
Learn your best times. Try to fit your work around your natural rhythm.
One thing at a time. Don’t try to do two (or more) tasks at once.
Prepare for concentrated work. Close down your email and put your phone on silent before focusing on a project.
When you’re in the middle of a dull project, give yourself little breaks for a fun activity—ideally something creative, or a little challenging. If you approach the fun activity with as much focus as the project, this trick is not as counter-intuitive as it seems.
Attentiveness - "Awareness"
Attentiveness - "Awareness"
POSTED JULY 7, 2021
Besides its "focusing" aspect (Attentiveness - "Focus", June 22,2021 - ABOVE), attentiveness has also taken on the meaning of "awareness." To be attentive in this sense means being aware of our environment, the people around us, and our own internal emotions. Attentiveness in the sense of awareness is a necessary ingredient in many of Thomas Moore's soul values - deeply felt experiences, meaningful relationships, contemplation, spiritual peace, for example. Whether we are enjoying the bird song of an early summer morning, talking with an anxious friend, or understanding our own emotions and motivations, awareness always improves the experience and the outcome...READ
Deeply Felt Experiences
Numerous research studies have shown that experiences provide us with more and longer-lasting happiness than things. [1] This is an unsurprising finding but raises the question of how then can we get the most out of our experiences. After a while, experiences, particularly repetitive experiences, often become less deeply meaningful unless we consciously turn our attention to them.
For the 19th century French novelist Gustave Flaubert, the key to meaningful experience was to look closely at everything we encounter - experience each thing to its fullest, allowing it to stimulate desire, wonder, awe. In Flaubert's words: "For anything to become interesting you simply have to look at it for a long time." In other words, look at it as you would a work of art. Listen to it, smell it, taste it as you would the first time. In short, be attentive and fully engaged.
Today, psychologists are proving the wisdom of Flaubert's words. Research by psychologist Mark Killingsworth found that for 47 percent of the time, the average mind is wandering. The study also examined whether people were less happy when their minds were wandering - i.e., when they were not following the 1970's adage to "be here now." Killingsworth's results indicate that "happiness is indeed highly sensitive to the contents of our moment-to-moment experience. And one of the most powerful predictors of happiness is something we often do without even realizing it: mind-wandering." Killingsworth's study also found that people are less happy when they’re mind-wandering no matter what they’re doing. In an article describing his work, he uses the example of the daily commute to illustrate his point, and also notes that "this pattern holds for every single activity we measured."
Relationships
Communicating effectively is important in all professions and all relationships. One of the secrets of great communicators is their attentiveness to what others are saying - a good communicator listens rather than just hears. A few tips on better communications:
Pay attention. Many times, we do not even hear what is said by another person. Our minds are elsewhere. We are not paying attention.
When someone asks for your time to hear them out, do so. Validating someone and giving them your undivided attention is important to a relationship of any kind. [2]
Acknowledge other people as equals. Talk with them, not to them. [3]
Help others listen to what you have to say. Think before you speak. Speak clearly. Ask them questions; answer the questions they ask you. [3]
Slow down. Pause, think and reflect before responding to what the other person has said or asked. [3]
Attentiveness also plays an important role in improving the nature and quality of our relationships with others. Being attentive to another's feelings and needs and being aware of how our actions and words are affecting them are aspects of this form of attentiveness. Checking in with a friend who is going through a rough patch, listening intently to what another person is saying, watching for non-verbal clues* are some examples. Our empathy and emotional intelligence grow as we become more attentive, and this increased empathy and emotional intelligence will lead us to be more attentive. It's a feedback loop.
Through the ages, religious traditions have understood the importance of awareness and attentiveness to the other. King Solomon asks God for "a listening heart." St. Francis of Assisi prays that he "may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand." More recently, existential philosopher and Jewish theologian Martin Buber's proposed the concept of "I-Thou" - treating the other person as a subject rather than an object - and it is the heart of his philosophy of dialogue. Buber's I and Thou is a landmark in 20th century intellectual history and one of the most important books of Western theology. In it, he explores "how to master the orientation of heart, mind, and spirit essential for the art of sincere and honorable relationship." For Buber, an "I-Thou" relationship is one of reciprocity and mutuality. Human beings enter into an I-Thou relationship with their innermost and whole beings.
I-and-Thou: the philosophy of Martin Buber (Apr 11, 2018) and sidebar
Knowing our emotions
Finally, we need to be self-aware and attentive to our own emotional state.
Understanding our emotions and recognizing the emotions of others are important factors in developing our emotional intelligence - "the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one's emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically."
Examples of high-emotional-intelligence behavior from Inc.com are given in the sidebar. As with much in life, practice makes perfect. Or as Gandhi put it, "Your actions become your habits, your habits become your values."** By acting in ways that are signs of high emotional intelligence, we gradually become a person of high emotional intelligence.
Understanding our emotions is part of the process of maturing. In a BBC Teach article, child mental health expert Shahana Knight shares her insight into why it's important for both children and adults to understand and recognize their emotions. [5]
Understanding the reason behind our emotion helps us figure out what makes us feel good and what doesn’t.
We feel more in control. Our emotions can greatly affect mood and behaviors. "Having the skills to reflect on their feelings and realize they are in control of how they feel will have a massive impact on their purposefulness and ownership of their life."
Negative emotions can lead to negative thoughts. "Teaching children that they have the power to change those thoughts and that they can decide what they think can change perceptions and mould them in to young people who can reframe negativity, be happier and believe in themselves."
We can ask for help. "Learning to communicate with the people around them and identifying what they need in order to help them is a way of children developing healthy ways to regulate their emotions."
It helps you to be a better friend.
Knight's post [5] also gives tips on how to help children manage their emotions. Like the rest of the post, the tips are good for adults too.
I'll close with an excellent summary of the importance of understanding our emotions and feelings from Hakumi Karimova at the Positive Psychology website [4]:
"Being attuned with what one is feeling...can be empowering. Instead of trying to suppress, reject, or ignore emotions, people learn how to express and share them in a constructive way, as well as analyze the role they play in one’s life...Gaining awareness in this area can give [individuals] a chance to align themselves with the things they want, the outcomes that interest them, and the emotional states that help them work towards their goals despite imminent challenges."
*Going beyond the detective story cliché of looking for "tells" that a person is lying, psychologists are now doing research into how to decipher clues in human behavior.
**The full quote is "Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your values, your values become your destiny."
[1] The Atlantic [2] McGill Media [3] Your Career Mentor website [4] Positive Psychology [5] BBC Teach
It's in the eyes...
It's in the eyes...
(From McGill Media [3])
Rolling eyes
This is a way of saying “Here we go again, same old same old.” Obviously, they have a need to repeat whatever it is again and try to get you involved in the drama of it all once again so hang on.
Squinting eyes
Tells you they are puzzled by something; they need some guidance or perhaps a plan of action that you can help with.
Red eyes
They have been crying about something important to them. No matter what it is, that brings someone to such an emotional point they do need to be heard.
Big bulging eyes
You know they are mad about something, that’s a given. None of us deserves to be on the other end of someone anger yet most times we can defuse a situation with a voice of reason.
Vague, distant look in the eyes
This person is saying they need your attention, and that would be sooner than later. Someone is in distress, and perhaps we can help refer them to someone if you are not a doctor or a trained professional.
1. You think about feelings.
2. You pause.
3. You strive to control your thoughts.
4. You benefit from criticism.
5. You show authenticity.
6. You demonstrate empathy.
7. You praise others.
8. You give helpful feedback.
9. You apologize.
10. You forgive and forget.
11. You keep your commitments.
12. You help others.
13. You protect yourself from emotional sabotage.
-Justin Bariso, author of EQ Applied
Mindfulness Exercises
Mindfulness Exercises
POSTED MARCH 29, 2020
Jon Kabat Zinn, known for his work on mindfulness-based stress reduction, defined mindfulness as “The awareness that arises from paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment and non-judgmentally.” It's the ability to bring awareness to experiences, feelings, and emotions by shifting your thoughts away from distraction and into intention. Studies have shown that mindfulness can reduce stress as well as symptoms of depression and anxiety, improve our ability to cope with stressful situations, and increase our emotional intelligence - particularly in the processing and "self-regulation" of emotions. (1)
No one is born with more mindfulness than anyone else. Mindfulness can be learned. Using various exercises and techniques, anyone can become more mindful. Perhaps the most used method, and certainly the one with the longest history, is meditation. Other methods have developed over the past 60 years including cognitive therapy and mindfulness exercises.
Meditation
In the sidebar is one method of mindfulness meditation from the Harvard Gazette. Interestingly, their final advice "20 minutes per day for maximum benefit" is the same as recommended by those who practice transcendental meditation. A difference between the two methods is the personal mantra used in transcendental meditation, where the repetition of a sound is used to stay focussed. Tibetan Buddhists also use a mantra while those of the Theravada tradition pay attention to the breath, or to body and feelings, or the current of ideas and images that moves through the mind. (2)
Cognitive Therapy
Cognitive therapy, also known as cognitive behavioral therapy, is based on the idea that how we think (cognition), how we feel (emotion) and how we act (behavior) all interact together. Specifically, our thoughts determine our feelings and our behavior. (3) Although the therapeutic practice started in the 1960's, the concept goes as far back as the Buddha and, in the West, to the Stoics.*
You don't necessarily have to go to a CBT therapist to obtain some of the benefits. There are self-help guides and internet resources available. Though not as effective as therapy with a therapist, self-directed cognitive therapy has led to "significant reductions in anxiety and depression" and studies show that people who do self-help CBT for anxiety and depression tend to hold on to their progress over time. Summarizing the method in a Psychology Today article (4), clinical assistant professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, Seth Gillen wrote:
Cognitive techniques include:
Learning to identify your thought patterns.
Discovering how your thoughts affect your feelings and behaviors.
Determining if your thoughts are accurate.
Replacing biased thoughts with more realistic ones.
Behavioral techniques include:
Scheduling activities for yourself that bring you enjoyment and a sense of accomplishment.
Recognizing how your actions influence your thoughts and emotions.
Planning ways to make the best use of your time.
Breaking down big, daunting tasks into smaller, more manageable ones.
Facing your fears gradually and systematically so they diminish.
Mindfulness Exercises
There are multitudes of sites that provide mindfulness exercises - a Google search came up with 20 million hits! The authors provide exercises for all sorts of purposes and audiences: teens and tweens, workplace, caregivers, "superhuman focus", calm your mind, sleep, etc. Here are a couple I hope you find helpful.
6 Mindfulness Exercises You Can Try Today from the Pocket Mindfulness website (link in sidebar) gives detailed exercises on mindful breathing, observation, awareness, listening, immersion, and appreciation. The mindful observation exercise is given in the sidebar. "This exercise is simple but incredibly powerful because it helps you notice and appreciate seemingly simple elements of your environment in a more profound way. The exercise is designed to connect us with the beauty of the natural environment, something that is easily missed when we are rushing around in the car or hopping on and off trains on the way to work." (5) The other exercises are also simply explained and easy to practice.
Mindfulness exercises for beginners (link in sidebar) is one of several web pages from the Mindfulness Exercises website and includes a short video of Jon Kabat-Zinn discussing "what mindfulness and meditation are really about." Step by step exercises as well as helpful videos are given for these eight mindfulness exercises for beginner (6):
1. Two minute mindful breathing: "Even just a few minutes of focussed breathing can make a tangible difference to your state of mind. You’re left feeling recharged and re-centered to go about your day."
2. The basic body scan meditation: "By scanning each part of your body, you create space for tense areas to relax. By the end of the guided meditation, you’ll likely feel more grounded and at peace."
3. Three mindful breaths: "In the space of just a few mindful inhales and exhales, we’re able to take a step back from the hustle and bustle of the real world and cultivate a sense of awareness."
4. Mindful walking meditation: "Some people find that seated mindfulness exercises aren’t always suitable for them.... That’s where mindful movement exercises like walking can play an important role."
5. Gratitude meditation: "one of the most important benefits of a regular meditation practice is a heightened sense of gratitude...associated with improvements in gratitude and happiness, and reductions in perceived stress levels."
6. The mindful eating exercise: "The raisin drill is a great way to turn a seemingly ordinary experience into an opportunity to develop awareness. It’s also an excellent reminder of the benefits of slowing down when we eat."
7. Guided mindfulness exercise for anxiety, stress, and sleep: "The science shows regular meditation can potentially be beneficial for all of the above."
8. Mindful listening practice: "...mindful listening practice courtesy of Alan Watts... it’s rare us to take time to simply be still and listen to what’s going on around us. However, the potential value of doing just that is immense. Not only does being a good listener improve your communication skills, it may also help you be more present in everyday life."
References: (1) Learning Mind website; (2) BBC; (3) Simply Psychology; (4) Psychology Today; (5) Pocket Mindfulness; (6) Mindfulness Exercises
* Buddha: “Whatever one frequently thinks and ponders upon, that will become the inclination of his mind.”
Marcus Aurelius: ”Your mind will take on the character of your most frequent thoughts: souls are dyed by thoughts”.
Mindfulness meditation made easy (Harvard Gazette)
Mindfulness meditation made easy (Harvard Gazette)
Settle in
Find a quiet space. Using a cushion or chair, sit up straight but not stiff; allow your head and shoulders to rest comfortably; place your hands on the tops of your legs with upper arms at your side.
Now breathe
Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and relax. Feel the fall and rise of your chest and the expansion and contraction of your belly. With each breath notice the coolness as it enters and the warmth as it exits. Don't control the breath but follow its natural flow.
Stay focused
Thoughts will try to pull your attention away from the breath. Notice them, but don't pass judgment. Gently return your focus to your breath. Some people count their breaths as a way to stay focused.
Take 10
A daily practice will provide the most benefits. It can be 10 minutes per day, however, 20 minutes twice a day is often recommended for maximum benefit.
Pocket Mindfulness
Pocket Mindfulness
Mindful Observation
Choose a natural object from within your immediate environment and focus on watching it for a minute or two. This could be a flower or an insect, or even the clouds or the moon.
Don’t do anything except notice the thing you are looking at. Simply relax into watching for as long as your concentration allows.
Look at this object as if you are seeing it for the first time.
Visually explore every aspect of its formation, and allow yourself to be consumed by its presence.
Allow yourself to connect with its energy and its purpose within the natural world.
Mindfulness Exercises Website
Mindfulness Exercises Website
Stilling the mind
Stilling the mind
POSTED AUGUST 2, 2020
It's a time of pandemic. Deaths are on the rise again; unemployment remains high; foreclosures and evictions loom for many.
It's a time of pandemic. Deaths are on the rise again; unemployment remains high; foreclosures and evictions loom for many.
It's a time of manufactured division. Pronouncements from a divisive, out-of-control president assault the decent instincts of the people, the highest ideals of the country and the basic tenets of the democracy.
It's a time of manufactured division. Pronouncements from a divisive, out-of-control president assault the decent instincts of the people, the highest ideals of the country and the basic tenets of the democracy.
There's much to trouble the mind with no definite end in sight. Meditation, "stilling the mind," is a practice that may help through the coming months or years.
There's much to trouble the mind with no definite end in sight. Meditation, "stilling the mind," is a practice that may help through the coming months or years.
Meditation Refresher
The simplest meditation is to follow your breathing. The Four Step Guide to Still the Mind from Universal Meditations notes that you can meditate in a legs-crossed sitting position, in a chair, or even lying down. Find the position that is right for you and then send a clear internal message to the body. The message is: “You will maintain stillness for the next period of time (however long you wish to be in meditation).” The third step is to "observe the movement of your breath. Feel as if the breath is a pendulum that swings inward and outward. Make the breath smooth, without any pauses or hitches." The fourth step is for those of us who at this point have a sudden rush in our minds about all of the things we must do that need our attention. "With a pen and paper next to you, list all the needs or stresses, letting yourself know that these will be addressed after the meditation is complete."
Timeless Advice
Spend as much time as possible engaging in Thomas Moore's "Soul Values" These are the experiences that make life most worth living.
Marcus Aurelius:
"Whenever you want to cheer yourself, think of the qualities of your fellows – the energy of one, for example, the decency of another, the generosity of a third... There is nothing so cheering as the stamp of virtues manifest in the character in colleagues... So keep them ready to hand.”
“In this world there is only one thing of value, to live out your life in truth and justice, tolerant of those who are neither true nor just.”
Albert Camus:
"What we learn in time of pestilence: that there are more things to admire in men than to despise."
"Our task as [humans] is to find the few principles that will calm the infinite anguish of free souls. We must mend what has been torn apart, make justice imaginable again in a world so obviously unjust, give happiness a meaning once more.”
Twenty-First Century Tips
Covid
Calm your mind by taking charge of your thoughts...the best antidote to fear is "I can handle it." ...You don't want an emergency or a tragedy to happen, but if you have to cope with one, you will handle it, somehow.
Consciously choose love instead of fear.
Trump
Be mindful about media consumption, especially social media...."Constantly checking the news, and especially social media, is a form of hypervigilance, which again provokes the fight-or-flight response that drains us of energy"
Take some time off , and be okay with not always knowing the latest about everything that’s happening. We might take a page from the fasters' book and spend several days not watching cable news, checking our news feeds, or visiting social media.
Sidebar links from the top: TED talk by mindfulness expert Andy Puddicombe, Psychology Today on coping with fear, Vox on combatting "Trump fatigue"
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