dada-telemetry

a bi-weekly series of non-sequitur livestreamed performances of longform generative audiovisual creations

every other Monday morning (KST), begun in May 2025 (YouTube Live)

currently on indefinite hiatus

#1 - the blooming enonion

#2 - ballet

#3 rotting on the vine

#1 - the blooming enonion

the onion bloometh forth unendingly, one has only to look away, ere it look away from you

livestreamed - May 5, 8am-12pm KST

#2 - ballet

the debut performance of FERNANDA, a dramatic ballet in three acts performed by nascent local dance quartet trio

One may wonder at the thought of the sheer herculean effort required for this particularly cast-iron cast to summon the ability to move even the slightest bit of their own volition in the first place, let alone attempt dancing, as beheld in this stage production of FERNANDA, a three-act ballet scheduled to premiere on Monday, May 19th at Hampington Center for the Arts' Bressler Auditorium. It bears noting that the cast devoted immeasurable time preparing for this event, developing the effort required, and to then coordinate, plan and execute this splendid performance. When interviewed, which is often, they eagerly state that in comparison, learning to dance was not the most challenging part of the process. Once self-consciousness and the power of self-willed ambulation was established, the rest was comparatively easy. Once rehearsals were underway, an enormous pre-production hurdle was convincing the local theater to sponsor and stage the production, as few associated with the venue were accustomed to these unlikely individuals having artistic ambitions in the first place. However, against all odds, the troupe persevered.

The cast and crew dedicate this performance to Standing Lamp, who suffered an injury during early rehearsals, precluding her from participation in the performance.

Fans anticipate the possibility of a musical version of FERNANDA called FERNANDA!

Hampington Register Arts editor, Wayne Polumchak, BSM

SYNOPSIS - "FERNANDA", a ballet in three acts

ACT ONE:

FERNANDA, the prettiest of the BURGERMEISTER's daughters, is picking flowers in the meadow while TWO SUITORS vie for her affection as she feigns aloofness. The SUITORS fight.

FERNANDA feigns shock and unconvincingly threatens to summon her father, the BURGERMEISTER. The SUITORS, however, panic and cease fighting. An irrelevant production number concludes the FIRST ACT.

ACT TWO:

ESMERELDA (FERNANDA's mother and wife of the BURGERMEISTER) is seen planting petunias in her splendid garden, lamenting her daughter's delayed choosing of a husband. Meanwhile, an UNDERCOVER VICE OFFICER and a DRUG DEALER are skulking about the garden. Both are separately interested in what suspicious plants ESMERELDA might be secretly cultivating there.

She spots them and one by one tries to convince them to woo FERNANDA, but the two have other agendas.

The OFFICER and the DEALER suddenly recognize each other and a chase ensues. The frantic DUET becomes TRIO as ESMERELDA joins in, trying to regain their attention. The two men exeunt. ACT TWO comes to a grisly close as ESMERELDA is eaten by a BEAR, as an AMPHIBIOUS PORPOISE looks on.

ACT THREE:

The final act opens with a joyous production number that evening at the village barn dance.

Afterwards, the BURGERMEISTER gives a speech to the TOWNSPEOPLE declaring the prize for Best Dancer to be FERNANDA'S hand in marriage. FERNANDA at first feigns excitement but quickly plots to foil her father's meddling by sabotaging the dance by releasing a WOMBAT and a RHINOCEROS onto the dance floor. Her plan fails when the two animals fall in love and elope after driving off all of the TOWNSPEOPLE. In a surprising twist, ESMERELDA appears, covered in blood and entrails. She delivers an impassioned story of how she heard the barn dance music from inside the BEAR's belly and escaped with the aid of her pruning shears. Seeing the bedlam her daughter has caused, ESMERELDA promptly sends FERNANDA off to a convent. The ballet ends with a TRIO between ESMERELDA, FERNANDA and the MOTHER SUPERIOR, who appears suddenly, shedding the disguise of an AMPHIBIOUS PORPOISE.

THE END

CAST

Row of Chairs - FERNANDA, VICE OFFICER, BEAR, BURGERMEISTER

Table - SUITOR 1, ESMERELDA, TOWNSPERSON 1, WOMBAT

File Cabinet - SUITOR 2, DRUG DEALER, PORPOISE/MOTHER SUPERIOR, TOWNSPERSON 2, RHINOCEROS

Choreographed by Table

Written and Directed by Row of Chairs

#3 rotting on the vine

This piece attempts to capture the feeling one has before an important life course change is about to occur. Here we are. A breath of silence and stillness sitting upon the now cold stone we push off from in order to sail into uncertain but welcome new waters. Growth is breaking from stagnant cycles.