Faendryl Cuisine of the Diaspora

[Note: Nazarr was unable to deliver the talk directly due to computer issues, so Lylia stepped in and delivered it according to Nazarr's notes.]

[Alabaster Spire, Dining Hall]

The alabaster walls alternate between a series of haon-framed mirrors and sconces that illuminate oil paintings depicting historically significant Faendryl and officers of the Enclave. A massive ebonwood dining table set for a formal meal traverses the length of the narrow room. You also see a snow white raven, a sleek white cat that is sitting, a cloud of light green smoke that is flying around, the cauldron-shaped Anstara disk, a dejected desert spirit that is flying around, an ebonwood doorway, a keystone marble arch and a vibrant canvas.

Also here: Gutstorm, Melikor, Ysharra, Lady Starletdawn, Anstara, Hadya, Imperatrix Lylia, Peltast Vaeldrys

Obvious exits: none

Lylia says, "I do believe we may not see Nazarr again this afternoon, but I do have his notes."

Lylia says, "And I would hate to keep people waiting to dine."

Anstara says, "Ah, what a shame."

With an imperious flick of its plume-like tail, a large black cat saunters in and pauses to regard its surroundings with a narrow-eyed gaze. Having seen nothing that merits its immediate attention, the black cat moves on.

Gutstorm drunkenly slurs, "Dish place got one dem shex dunginsh like dat other dark elf tower, da dhenar one?"

Speaking to Starletdawn, Ysharra says, "We normally keep the Spire open to visitors, after all, we are a...dramatic, showy people."

Lylia briskly asks, "Well, then. I fear if I wait longer for Nazarr, I shall not have time to regale you myself with tales of the spice trade, so let us do so replete with full bellies, shall we?"

Lylia removes a slim ki-lin horn stylus bound in silver from in her wrap.

Lylia says, "I know Nazarr worked hard on this and is always such a delight; I am only sorry he must miss it himself."

(Lylia makes a few last-minute notes in the margins.)

Ysharra says, "Lylia is taking the reins."

Lylia clears her throat.

Lylia admits, "I do like doing that."

Lylia smiles and gestures to the laden table.

Lylia says, "I would like to welcome you all to A Culinary Journary: Diaspora at the Dining Table, originally given by Nazarr Czaba Faendryl, who grew up in Imperial lands on a farm in a mountainous region."

Lylia says, "He first set foot in New Ta'Faendryl only a few years ago, shortly after arriving in the Landing, and I imagine it was something of a shock. As he told me, 'I had never imagined the elegance, the grandeur, or the formality of a city full of dark elves, and my command of the Faendryl dialect was, shall we say, less than perfect,' but I thought his pronunciation was fine."

Lylia murmurs, "When you see him, you may tell him I said so."

Lylia says, "He went on: 'Over time, I became aware that I, like many dark elves, was a product of adaptation. As our people have scattered in the aftermath of war, jealousy, racial hatred, and fear, we have striven to blend into multiracial communities -- like the Landing -- while still remaining wholly ourselves.' These words stuck with me, a product of the city itself, and broadened my view immensely."

Lylia asks, "One way that diasporic dark elves adapt is through food. This is probably true of many of you from elsewhere in the world, is it not?"

Lylia says, "Many of us recall favorite dishes from our youth, some of which, when seen through an adult prism, are the product of privation or need."

Lylia says, "Much of traditional Faendryl cuisine is based on what was available in the desert caverns of Rhoska-Tor, so there is a heavy emphasis on mushrooms, bats, snakes, lizards, insects, and arachnids."

Lylia says, "As one may imagine, desert-and-cave spawned ingredients are not always easy to find in other environments, so a great deal of substitution is necessary, as Nazarr noted when we have dined together."

Lylia says, "Two traditional Faendryl foods are fried glazed bat chunks and a grilled lizard and locust kabob, both of which are well represented here already."

Lylia glances at a grilled lizard and locust kabob on a dining table.

(Lylia indicates a platter filled with honey-glazed and batter-covered dark meat chunks which are not recognizable as any particular type of food. Some may catch a faint whiff of citrus or of ginger.)

Lylia continues, "For Nazarr and his family, the meal known as "bat chunks" was easy to adapt to local cuisine. This 'mock bat', as it is called, is generally the cheapest and most readily available of meat."

Lylia says, "As he told me, this is because suspicious guards have broken into homes, claiming that a traditional Faendryl meal was a necromantic or demon-summoning ritual. Many automatically offer the chunks to disprove this claim."

Lylia says, "One can readily imagine the scene -- suspicious neighbors or guards disarmed by the offering of food, which brings people together like few other things can."

Lylia says, "As you can imagine, It is much safer to do this if the food is something that the guards will recognize."

Lylia says, "Nazarr described that the 'bat chunks' his mother made contain no bat. In summer, they are made of fresh fish from mountain streams. The fish are sprinkled with wild herbs and then fried in butter. As it is fried, a few drops of honey are drizzled on it."

Lylia says, "I imagine they are something like the magnificent fishcakes brought to us by Missoni."

Ysharra says, "Mm, river fish."

Lylia helps herself to a chile-flecked cod fishcake.

(Lylia takes a moment to enjoy her fishcake before continuing.)

Lylia continues, "And in autumn, after the hogs have been butchered, she made them from pork that has been baked in apples. Once the baking is done, she lightly brushed the chunks with the past spring's maple syrup and then fried them in a pan."

Lylia says, "Believe me, when Nazarr describes this, it makes me ravenous."

Anstara says, "The mock bat is very good as well."

Lylia says, "I am convinced that if I dined with him too often, I should not fit in any of my gowns."

Lylia says, "And in winter, the 'bat chunks' are slices of pickled mutton sprinkled with bay leaves, thyme, and cloves, and served with crushed juniper berries."

Lylia says, "Nazarr confided that the pork is his favorite, probably because growing up on a sheep and rolton farm means lots of mutton on the dinner table, but also out of a love of juniper berries."

Lylia says, "Venison dipped in honey and then fried is common fare for many dark elves living in near-invisibility in heavily forested areas of the Empire. Coastal regions favor 'silver darlings,' which are herrings dusted with sea salt and served with fresh kelp."

Xorus says, "The technical term of art is 'tiny chicken'."

Lylia says, "Interestingly, Nazarr notes that in areas where undead are a serious problem, the "bat chunks" are never red meat and are always cooked until there is no blood... presumably to convince any of the aforementioned guards or suspicious neighbors that they are not being invited to eat people."

Lylia says, "It always tickles me when Silvean calls them that."

Lylia continues, "But where there are a thousand variants for fried glazed bat chunks, there's a bit more uniformity with grilled lizard and locust kabobs."

Lylia helps herself to a grilled lizard and locust kabob.

Lylia smiles as she shows the kabob to the audience, waving it about. Some may notice a scent of sage, mesquite, and fiery red pepper.

Speaking to her glazed bat chunks, Starletdawn asks, "What type of chunk are you?"

Lylia says, "Ah, double-fisted eating. I shall need a nap after this."

Speaking to Hadya, Ysharra says, "That's Thrassus's favorite."

Lylia says, "The large, robust locusts common to the desert are not so common where Nazarr grew up, as they only have a single species that hatches every couple of decades."

Lylia says, "And while it is possible to capture and fatten up a large lizard over the course of a year and then kill it before a festival, it is hard to find a lizard in the mountains immense enough to feed four adults and four children, a family the size of his."

Speaking to Starletdawn, Melikor says, "These are the pork variety."

Lylia notes, "They grow larger in the Southron Wastes."

Lylia says, "So, if your "grilled lizard and locust kabob" features no locust and very little lizard, then obviously you need to adapt the recipe."

Lylia says, "According to Nazarr, a common adaptation in the Human empire involves swapping the lizard for chicken. After all, to many people, chicken tastes exactly like lizard, and consuming chicken raises the eyebrows of fewer neighbors."

Lylia says, "I should note here that I find them distinctly different in texture, but when milled fine or chopped well, they are similar."

Lylia says, "The chicken slices are grilled in a spicy red pepper sauce while the "locusts," generally either lamb or goat meat in locust-shaped pastry shells pierced with skewer holes, such as these here, bake and simmer in onions and garlic."

Lylia swiftly runs the tip of her forefinger across a stuffed locust-shaped pastry on a dining table.

Lylia adds, "Once the "lizard" meat and "locust" pastries are done, they are placed on skewers along with grilled mushrooms, peppers, onions, wild herbs, and whatever else you want to add. Cheese is popular, for instance."

Lylia says, "Traditionally for Nazarr, the only drink served with this is water, preferably containing chips of ice, but where I hail from in the city itself, yogurt-based drinks and fruit ices are more common."

Lylia elaborates, "Other kabob variants involve duck grilled in mushroom wine or plum wine, swan grilled with yellow peppers, heron grilled with frogs' legs, and so on. In coastal regions in the Human empire, the most common variant features a common fish such as grilled flounder as the lizard and lobster, the poor man's meat, as Human commoners call it, as the "locust.""

Ysharra says, "I like the flounder version, very much."

Anstara says, "All of that sounds really good."

Lylia says, "You see why Nazarr would make me fat? Imagine this as your dining-hall conversation nightly."

Lylia says, "Nazarr even has thoughts on dessert, although he notes that these are more locally sourced for Diasporic Faendryl. Unfortunately, underground caves tend to be bereft of sugar, chocolate, eggs, butter, and cream, just to name a few ingredients that most desserts deem vital. Very few Faendryl desserts originated in Rhoska-Tor, and those that did are so rooted in the wastelands that substitution is unlikely."

Lylia says, "He described a dish I have yet to direct our kitchens to prepare: chilled prickly pears served with a cool syrup made from gelled prickly pear juice, thyme honey, and cinnamon."

Lylia says, "He has yet to sample it, he notes here, and I should rectify that."

Lylia says, "I shall conclude with a quote from the man himself: 'Perhaps that is the best way of defining our people. We will adapt when necessary to fit in better, to save our lives, or to gain power -- and we will be both tempting and delectable while doing so.'."

Anstara says, "What a wonderful sentiment."

Vaeldrys says, "The very essence of the Faendryl."

Lylia says, "I hope this has given you some insight into what is on the table before you, and I hope you may all stay here for a moment while I prepare for our next presentation..."

With an imperious flick of its plume-like tail, a large black cat saunters in and pauses to regard its surroundings with a narrow-eyed gaze. Having seen nothing that merits its immediate attention, the black cat moves on.

(Lylia grins with rueful amusement.)