Diasporic Food

Nazarr recites:

"I'd like to welcome you all to A Culinary Journary: Diaspora at the Dining Table."

Nazarr recites:

"As many of you know, I am a farm boy from the mountains, and I grew up in the human empire."

Nazarr recites:

"I first set foot in New Ta'Faendryl three years ago, shortly after I had arrived in the Landing, and it was something of a shock. I had never imagined the elegance, the grandeur, or the formality of a city full of dark elves, and my command of the Faendryl dialect was, shall we say, less than perfect."

Nazarr's cheeks flush with a deep shade of red.

Speaking sympathetically to Nazarr, Ysharra says, "It took me more than two decades to say anything besides my name."

Nazarr recites:

"Over time, I became aware that I, like many dark elves, was a product of adaptation. As our people have scattered in the aftermath of war, jealousy, racial hatred, and fear, we have striven to blend into multiracial communities--like the Landing--while still remaining wholly ourselves."

Asylum coughs.

Asylum says, "Closer to three."

Nazarr recites:

"One way that diasporic dark elves adapt is through food."

Nazarr recites:

"Much traditional Faendryl cuisine is based on what was available in the desert caverns of Rhoska-Tor, so there is a heavy emphasis on mushrooms, bats, snakes, lizards, insects, and arachnids. As one may imagine, desert-and-cave spawned ingredients are not always easy to find in other environments, so a great deal of substitution is necessary."

Nazarr recites:

"Two traditional Faendryl foods are fried glazed bat chunks and a grilled lizard and locust kabob."

(Nazarr shows the audience a platter filled with honey-glazed and batter-covered dark meat chunks which are not recognizable as any particular type of food. Some may catch a faint whiff of citrus or of ginger.)

Asylum says, "The scent is quite delightful."

Nazarr recites:

"The meal known as "bat chunks" is easy to adapt to local cuisine. The "mock bat", as it is called, is generally the cheapest and most readily available of meat."

Nazarr recites:

"This is because, over the centuries, suspicious guards have broken into homes, claiming that a traditional Faendryl meal was a necromantic or demon-summoning ritual. Many automatically offer the chunks to disprove this claim."

Nazarr winks and flashes a sly grin.

Nazarr recites:

"It is much safer to do this if the food is something that the guards will recognize."

Speaking to Nazarr, Yardie asks, "Demon summoners cook?"

Speaking to Yardie, Asylum asks, "Quite often. It's a sort of summoning, too, hm?"

Asylum says, "Just more domestic."

Nazarr says, "Not all demon summoners are rich, and neither are all who are accused demon summoners."

Nazarr recites:

"The "bat chunks" my mother makes contain no bat. In summer, they are made of fresh fish from mountain streams. The fish are sprinkled with wild herbs and then fried in butter. As it's fried, a few drops of honey are drizzled on it."

Speaking to Yardie, Melikor says, "Or have the demons cook for us."

Speaking to Melikor, Yardie says, "That's...."

You say, "Sometimes you might need to set a demon on fire, too."

Speaking to Melikor, Asylum says, "Better than the ghouls. Sometimes they...accidentally season the food."

Nazarr recites:

"In autumn, after the hogs have been butchered, she makes them from pork that has been baked in apples. Once the baking is done, she lightly brushes the chunks with the past spring's maple syrup and then fries them in a pan for about two seconds."

Speaking surprisedly to Nazarr, Rohese opines, "That actually sounds quite delicious."

Missoni agrees, "I should like to try either of those recipes."

Nazarr recites:

"And in winter, the "bat chunks" are slices of pickled mutton sprinkled with bay leaves, thyme, and cloves, and served with crushed juniper berries."

Speaking to you, Melikor says, "I didn't specify who or what the demon would be cooking."

Speaking to Rohese, Asylum says, "I admit, I avoid this traditional dish, but the variety that's come up due to the diaspora...some of them are among my favorites."

Nazarr admits, "The pork is my favorite--probably because growing up on a sheep and rolton farm means lots of mutton on the dinner table--but I have to admit that I love juniper berries."

Nazarr recites:

"Anyway, those are far from the only variations."

Speaking softly to Asylum, Rohese says, "This is all quite revelationary."

Nazarr enthuses, "Venison dipped in honey and then fried is common fare for many dark elves living in near-invisibility in heavily forested areas of the Empire. Coastal regions favor "silver darlings"--herrings--dusted with sea salt and served with fresh kelp."

Speaking to Rohese, Asylum says, "I bet he's about to mention my- yes, there it is."

Speaking to Rohese, Asylum says, "The herrings. Absolutely delightful."

Speaking softly to Asylum, Rohese whispers aloud, "I am rather partial to fish."

Ysharra says, "I do not consume flesh, save for occasional fish - so that latter is the only one I know."

Jaderain huskily says, "I go soft for venison."

Ysharra says, "And it's quite tasty."

Missoni says, "But then I do live in Solhaven."

Nazarr states, "In areas where undead are a serious problem, the "bat chunks" are never red meat and are always cooked until there is no blood... presumably to convince any of the aforementioned panic-stricken guards that they are not being invited to eat people."

Speaking to Rohese, Asylum says, "Feeding her in a desert town occasionally proved challenging for our household staff."

Speaking to Rohese, Yardie whispers aloud, "I've taken to fishing recently. But these meals sound delightful, albeit I did not have much of them."

Speaking to Rohese, Asylum says, "You can tell from how spare she is."

Speaking to Asylum, Ysharra says, "Shush, you're being rude to Nazarr."

Nazarr continues, "But where there are a thousand variants for fried glazed bat chunks, there's a bit more uniformity with grilled lizard and locust kabobs."

Nazarr helps himself to a grilled lizard and locust kabob.

Nazarr smiles as he shows the kabob to the audience. Some may notice a scent of sage, mesquite, and fiery red pepper.

Speaking to Nazarr, Yardie says, "There's heat."

Speaking kindly to Asylum, Rohese whispers aloud, "Not at all."

Nazarr recites:

"Locusts are not common where I grew up, as they only hatch every couple of decades."

Nazarr mutters thankthegods.

Missoni wistfully says, "I hope we can take samples afterward."

Nazarr recites:

"And while it is possible to capture and fatten up a large lizard over the course of a year and then kill it before a festival, you're probably not going to find a lizard immense enough to feed four adults and four children."

Speaking to Missoni, Ysharra says, "Of course. Help yourself to anything you desire."

Speaking to Nazarr, Yardie says, "The tails can be delicious."

Nazarr recites:

"Such lizards most likely do live somewhere on Elanith... but I'm not sure the villages in their vicinity still do."

Nazarr recites:

"If your "grilled lizard and locust kabob" features no locust and very little lizard, then obviously you need to adapt the recipe."

Speaking to Dendum, Asylum asks, "Nice, isn't it?"

Nazarr recites:

"A common adaptation in the human empire involves swapping the lizard for chicken. After all, chicken tastes exactly like lizard, and consuming chicken raises the eyebrows of fewer neighbors."

Ysharra says, "It's better than the raw varieties the Tehir eat, I imagine."

Speaking to Asylum, Dendum says, ""Hrmm just a bit sweet but not so much as to not be good."

You mildly say, "Lizards squawk less."

Speaking to Dendum, Asylum says, "I do love the ginger."

Nazarr recites:

"The chicken slices are grilled in a spicy red pepper sauce while the "locusts"--generally either lamb or goat meat in locust-shaped pastry shells pierced with skewer holes--bake and simmer in onions and garlic."

Nazarr recites:

"Once the "lizard" meat and "locust" pastries are done, they are placed on skewers along with grilled mushrooms, peppers, onions, wild herbs, and whatever else you want to add. Cheese is popular, for instance."

Nazarr recites:

"Once the "lizard" meat and "locust" pastries are done, they are placed on skewers along with grilled mushrooms, peppers, onions, wild herbs, and whatever else you want to add. Cheese is popular, for instance."

Dendum says, "Humans are odd with what they will eat...some will eat the horse but not the rabbit or the rabbit but not the cat...strange people."

Nazarr wheezes, "Traditionally, the only drink served with this is water, preferably containing chips of ice--and trust me, ice water is exactly what you're going to need!"

Nazarr fans himself.

Speaking to Nazarr, Yardie asks, "Not a fan of spicy?"

Speaking tentatively to Nazarr, Rohese inquires, "Is it possible to leave out the locust and lizard elements to just have the vegetables?"

Speaking to Dendum, Asylum says, "It is strange. They eat their livestock and mock us for hunting bats for dinner."

Nazarr says, "I love spiciness, but spiciness makes me thirsty."

Nazarr's cheeks flush with a deep shade of red.

Speaking to Asylum, Ysharra asks, "The plight of the pig is there. What other purpose would the animal serve, if not for being food?"

Nazarr elaborates, "Other kabob variants involve duck grilled in mushroom wine or plum wine, swan grilled with yellow peppers, heron grilled with frogs' legs, and so on. In coastal regions in the human empire, the most common variant features a common fish such as grilled flounder as the lizard and lobster--the poor man's meat, as human commoners call it--as the "locust."."

Asylum says, "Ah, the duck variety sounds promising. I have not had that."

Nazarr recites:

"But of all of them, I prefer the chicken adaptation, both for its choice of fowl--water birds and wasteland caverns do not go together well in my mind--and for its mouth-scalding spiciness, which is supposed to simulate the merciless heat of the desert."

Missoni murmurs, "Heron and frog. I have not tried that one."

Nazarr recites:

"Finally, we need to discuss the most important part of any meal: dessert!"

Nazarr beams!

Speaking to Missoni, Asylum says, "Frogs are a bit greasy, but they do seem to be a great favorite in some parts of the world."

Nazarr recites:

"Unfortunately, underground caves tend to be bereft of sugar, chocolate, eggs, butter, and cream, just to name a few ingredients that most desserts deem vital. Very few Faendryl desserts originated in Rhoska-Tor, and those that did are so rooted in the wastelands that substitution doesn't seem like the way to go."

Dendum says, "Hrmm frogs are very good."

Speaking to Asylum, Missoni says, "Frog I have tried on its own, but not with heron."

Speaking to Ysharra, Asylum says, "Yes, do listen. So you'll finally have something sweet about you."

Speaking to Asylum, Ysharra says, "It's to hide the poison on my thorns, of course."

Nazarr recites:

"Take, for example, chilled prickly pears served with a cool syrup made from gelled prickly pear juice, thyme honey, and cinnamon."

Nazarr recites:

"I can't say I've ever had this dessert. Prickly pears are the fruit of cacti, and cacti aren't native to my mountains."

Asylum says, "A wonderful tradition, that dish. Refreshing after a meal."

Nazarr recites:

"Plus you need a sturdy knife and fork to peel them and some strong gauntlets to protect your hands--as well as three separate boilings and as many pressings with a potato masher."

Asylum says, "Not nearly as sweet as most of the baked goods that seem popular 'round here."

Missoni says, "My mother's favorite with a glass of brandy."

Speaking to Nazarr, Ysharra asks, "And who wants to own a potato masher?"

Jaderain huskily says, "Sounds like a lot of work."

Nazarr recites:

"In a way, I'm amazed that dishes involving less thorny, more readily available, and more tractable fruits haven't caught on."

Nazarr recites:

"And yet in another way, I'm not. Stubbornness and thorniness are intrinsic to our nature, after all. It's one thing to prepare a meal that is affordable and that won't result in suspicion, distrust, arrest, or death. It's another to remake yourself into the image of your non-Faendryl neighbors."

Asylum says, "Anyone who doesn't want to open their kitchen cabinets from time to time. That who wants a potato masher."

Speaking to Nazarr, Ysharra asks, "Stubborness?"

Ysharra says, "You don't say."

Speaking to Ysharra, Yardie says, "He's not wrong."

Nazarr recites:

"Perhaps that is the best way of defining our people. We will adapt when necessary to fit in better, to save our lives, or to gain power--and we will be both tempting and delectable while doing so."

Speaking to Ysharra, Asylum says, "Thorniness, too, half-breed."

You say, "This is clearly untrue. I have yet to meet a stubborn Faendryl."

Nazarr recites:

"But we do not, at bottom, change who we are."

Speaking to Nazarr, Dendum asks, ""This is some Faendryl saying?"

Nazarr nods at Dendum.

Speaking to Nazarr, Dendum says, "'We have a saying...The blood will always reveal itself....somewhat similar perhaps."

Speaking to Dendum, Missoni says, "I like that."

Nazarr says, "I have known too many half-Faendryl who know more about my culture than I do, so I can't make any comments about blood telling. I do believe that quality tells, however."