trapped bird !

Is your home sometimes mistaken for a woodland glade by a distracted bird? I hear about this a lot here in scenic (and historic) Maiden Bradley village, where I live in rainy UK. Birds getting trapped indoors.

Check it out. You've just sat down for a cuppa and started to chill, when, SUDDENLY - a strange noise! Intruder?! You go to DEFCON-1 (with a bullet) and your ears prick up like satellite dishes, straining for more intel as you reach for the rolling pin. Then.. You realize what it is. Oh no. Not again. There’s a bird loose in the hoose!

What to do?

First off, STAY CALM! Take a deep breath and then slowly creep (tiptoe even) to where your errent visiter is flapping mad (usually against a windowpane and wondering why the air there is so hard to fly through). When you’ve creeped to the commotion location, peep in (carefully) and scope the scene..

TAKE CARE YOU DON'T FREAK OUT THE

BIRD ANY MORE THAN IT ALREADY IS!

Once the situation is clarified you can quietly withdraw, closing the door softy behind you (and lose that rolling pin). Next ..whizz around the house opening all the windows and doors. When this is done take another deep breath (you need to stay calm so so as not to telegraph panic) and, again, creep back to where your scared visiter is probably having a nervous breather. S-l-o-w-l-y open the door w i d e and quietly slink off, out of the way of any possible flight paths - then wait..

Your house interior will soon be birdless again.

As soon as the coast is clear, close all the doors and windows.

Sorted.

TECHNICAL DETAILS : Usually a trapped bird, detecting the flow of air and sonic changes from the windows/doors you opened, will find its way out without anymore fuss. If this is inconvenient, or, for whatever reasons, the bird is still where it was; simply creep back into the bird room.. Leaving the door open - go directly to the window. Now, turn around and shoo the birdy out of the room by gently flapping your hands (no need to speak). The bird will escape from you through the door of the room (which you left open,) and will find its way back out into the wilds through one of the openings previously prepared.

TIP : A more direct method (less safe for the frightened bird though), is to go directly to the window where the trapped bird is knocking itself out and open that window. Retire immediately and close the door behind you. Personally, I prefer the longer method for bird health and safety reasons.

NOTE : The latter fast-track method is really better for flies, moths, butterflies and odd wayward dragonfly or lost bat. This can be tricky at night as quite often more things get in than get out!

ASIDE :

I had two occasions, two years running, when a swallow was stuck. They are quite fragile little birds and, as it happened, I was able to swiftly (albeit with care) gently grab, then dash to the front door...and safely release into open sky. Whoosh. However, do this only if you feel confident that you will not crush your feathered client to death in nervous agitation. Anyway, both times they still nested in my front porch - so, that was a mixed blessing.

a bird in the house!

quick! open windows and doors!

before it goes...SPLAT!

April/2010