Skoda Jokes (or Lada Jokes - For Alex)

How do you double the value of a Skoda?

Fill the tank !

How do you double the value of a Skoda?

Chuck a pound into it.

How can you tell that your Skoda has been broken into?

There's nothing missing.

How can you make policemen laugh?

Tell them your Skoda just got stolen.

What do you call a Skoda with a sun roof ?

A skip!

Why does a Skoda have a double rear window heater ?

To keep everyones hands warm when they are pushing it !

Whats the difference between a Jehova Witness and a Skoda?

You can shut the door on a Jehova Witness!

What do you call a Skoda full of food?

A Lada! (larder - get it)

What do you call a Skoda with automatic windows?

A toll booth.

What do you call a Skoda in the winter?

A freezer.

What do you call a Skoda in the summer?

An oven.

Why do Skodas have a rear wash wipe ?

........To remove the flies that crash into them.

What is the difference between a Skoda and the flu ?

You can get rid of the flu !

What do you call a Skoda at the the top of a hill ?

A miracle.

What do you call a Skoda with a ladder on the roof ?

A wheelbarrow !

What do you call a Skoda with a long radio aerial?

A dodgem!

What's the difference between being caught inside Kylie Minogue's Bra and being caught inside a Skoda ?

You feel a bigger tit in a Skoda !

What's the difference between a Skoda and tickets for an Oasis concert?

Oasis tickets go fast!

There is a big competition online: the first prize is a Skoda, the second prize is two Skodas.

I've just bought the new 16 valve Skoda

.......4 in the engine, 12 in the radio!

A guy goes into his local garage and asks "Do you have a windscreen wiper for my Skoda???"

"Sounds like a fair swap" replied the man in the garage.

From a newspaper:

"To the person who stole my Skoda in minus 10 degrees of frost. Keep the Skoda, but please tell me how the hell you started it!"