Ho Ho Ho!
What does Mrs. Claus sing to Santa on his birthday? "Freeze a jolly good fellow!"
What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a duck? A Christmas Quacker!
An honest politician, a kind lawyer and Santa Claus were walking down the street and saw a $20 bill. Which one picked it up?? Santa! The other two don't exist!
Why does Santa always go down the chimney? Because it soots him!
Where does Santa stay when he's on holidays? At a Ho-ho-tel!
What do the elves call it when Father Christmas claps his hands at the end of a play? Santapplause!
What do you call a kitty on the beach on Christmas morning? Sandy Claws!
Who delivers presents to dentist offices? Santa Jaws!
Who delivers Christmas presents to elephants? Elephanta Claus!
What do you get if Santa comes down the chimney while the fire is still burning? Crisp Kringle!
What do you call Santa when he has no money? Saint "Nickel"-less!
What smells most in a chimney? Santa's nose!
What do you call someone who doesn't believe in Father Christmas? A rebel without a Claus!
What does Santa like to have for breakfast? Mistle-"toast"!
Why does Santa take presents to children around the world? Because the presents won't take themselves!
What does Santa use when he goes fishing? His north pole!
How do we know Santa is such a good race car driver? Because he's always in pole position!
How does Father Christmas take pictures? With his North "Pole"-aroid!
What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride? A "Holly" Davidson!
Where does Father Christmas go to vote? The North Poll!
What's red and white and falls down the chimney? Santa Klutz!
What do you call Saint Nick after he has come down the chimney? Cinder Claus!
What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish!
Why does Santa owe everything to the elves? Because he is an elf-made man!
What does Santa get if he gets stuck in a chimney? Claustrophobic!
What goes oh, oh, oh? Santa Claus walking backwards!
How many chimneys does Saint Nick go down? Stacks!
What would you call Father Christmas if he became a detective? Santa Clues!
Who delivers Christmas presents to pets? Santa Paws of course!
Why does Santa like to work in his garden? Because he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe!