Tatyana

What are the needs for empathy at the HUB? Interview: Tatyana Vekovishcheva

Date: 2014-04-17

I can say that my value is not just empathy

but reciprocal empathy.

(at the HUB) Now we have unconscious empathy.

It can be more conscious empathy.

About

Tatyana is 27 years old and is from Russia. She has been in the US for about 3 years. She holds a Bachelor's and a Master's degree in Asian and African Studies from Russia's prestigious Moscow State University. For some time she was working in intercultural communications.

She now works at the Impact HUB as Member Information and Impact Manager, it's a data related job that measures the impact that HUB has on members and the impact members have on greater community.

What does empathy mean to you?

empathy can be

a scientific method.

Before, I knew this word as a psychological word, so it has a meaning in psychology. But recently I learned that, at least in Russian, empathy can be a scientific method. When are trying to create medicine to fight some viruses, they apply method of empathy so what they do they think they are a virus and they try to think how they would behave if they were a virus. And this method, when they think like that is called empathy.

So this means that in a broader terms, a more psychological term, empathy is, not a scientific method but a state of your mind, when you are trying to put yourself in the place of other person and think what would you do, or would you have done if you were that person.

I am the virus or I am the person how would I feel in that case, or what would I do? What did I feel that made me do this?

Do you use that method?

Sometimes I think like that? When I talk to someone or I'm with other people, I have a child, so sometimes I think, "Oh, probably she is doing that because she if feeling like this." I imagine myself that I’m four. I'm not four so I wouldn't see this, if I was four I would probably see this and I would behave like that.

Are you an empathic person?

It's quite natural for me to do that and not very difficult. I do not do it with a great effort.

Where did you learn that?

Some people are just more empathic in general because of their psychological or emotional state of mind, but everyone can be taught that. You can teach everyone that. I can’t say that I was taught that specifically by someone else or at school.

How does empathy feel as a felt experience? the embodied feeling?

I feel much easier. Usually you do that when you interact with someone and usually do that when there are problems or issues in that interaction. Or you have someone that needs help and are trying to figure out how to help them. And when you do that, the whole interaction or the process of how I can help them - becomes much easier. Oh yes, this is what I should do. Exactly.

Empathy has a sense of ease to it.. if there is a struggle or pain, the empathy brings a quality of ease? is that important to you?

yes it is important

Why?

Sometimes, it is a very good way of dealing with people and in solving problems and in resolving some types of conflicts. It is a really working useful tool.. it works and it helps.

Why important to resolve conflicts?

Life is better without conflicts.

Why?

**** Resolving conflicts and some help just makes makes peoples happier. You feel happier and/or feel the other people are happier and that is good too.

What about the role of empathy at the HUB?

I think we are doing good, in terms of empathy and listening to each other.

We have a diverse team, it’s not a flat organization, it has some hierarchy to it. We do not have a big team, we have maybe 10 people working here. We know each other and we all try to think and behave from not just from your own perspective, but from the perspective of the other person who you are working with. And trying to think from a broader perspective, not only yours but from other peoples.

I feel that when we have meetings or have talk about something and the talk is not very easy, we hear each other. So we are trying to understand the other peoples point of view.

Are there things that could be done to make it even more empathic?

Definitely. We do is naturally and that is how it is. Maybe if we will make that a goal or a point, or even say "this is how we should do it" it will be even more empathic. Because it will be more conscious. Now we have unconscious empathy. It can be more conscious empathy.

[idea: How might we make empathy an explicit and conscious value in organizations?]

13:00 You said empathy is perspective taking, role taking, can you take the role of the HUB?

You are impact HUB, tell me about yourself and empathy.

“I am the HUB and I am empathic. I think like I am empathic,”

“I can be more empathic of course. I can be more empathic if, I would say that my value is empathy. And I will implement that because I have values in general as an organization. There are 9 or 10 values that I have. I can say I have now another value and that value is empathy.

It can make my life as an organization more difficult, but probably it will make other people, who interact with me, for instance members, lives happier, or more satisfying and their interactions with me will be more satisfied.

it will be difficult for me to do, because I have a lot of members, and it means I will implement a much more individual approach to everyone. And because I have processes and policies and workflow and that stuff. It will make some those processes more difficult, or more customized, or more complicated. But as a big result, my members, board, community, of course, can be happier.

What do you as the HUB need to feel more empathy for yourself?

I don’t know how my members can be empathic for me as an organization, it this thing exists.. empathy for an organization and not for a living body person or say a dog? If this thing of empathy for an organization exist and can it be implemented and thought about?

Maybe they can say that , … it’s difficult…. not difficult, it may be strange in terms of organizational approach. people may think, "that’s kind of weird."

I can say that my value is not just empathy but reciprocal empathy. I will try to put myself in my members shoes but my members can put themselves in my shoes and think that what they are trying to accomplish is very important to them. And if they would like me to do so and so it will be difficult for me to do that., and make my life more difficult as an organization. And then they should adjust their expectations for me and what I can do as an organization from the flexibility and broadness of what I can do as an organization.

What questions would you ask to find our more about empathy at the HUB?

Is it necessary or important to be empathic?

What are the safe frames and ranges of your empathy behavior?

Do you say to yourself, "In some cases I would totally be empathic, but in other situation cases i would never be empathic?

Do you distinguish where and how you are empathic? Is there a boundary or a fence?

Do you try to be empathic in every situation?

Are you empathic when you are stressed, or just when your in a good mood and relaxed?

Do they say, I do not have energy or resources to be empathic..

As the HUB, what was the most (peak) empathic experience you had?

We had an big empathic experience as a team, when one of our colleagues had spine surgery. it was completely unexpected. and no-one was prepared. We acted like a supportive and empathic team and it was good.

[Interview Ideas:

[idea: people want to make other people happier - How might we find ways to make other people happier with empathy?

Learn how to use empathy to make other people happier and contribute to their well being.

[idea: How might we make is easier for the HUB to empathize with others so that it has more ease?

[idea: how is my overwhelm level at the moment? have a physical gauge

How might we do more empathic interviews about empathy?

Give more space and quiet time for people to come up with ideas.

try to stick more to the questions and ask "why" and go for the stories.

Have a little post interview gift.. some free empathy cards.. anytime you need to talk or some candy or chocolate?]