What If

At the end of every meeting, we hand out a questionnaire for feedback about the meeting experience. Everyone fills it out and then we go around and share. We ask,

I Like...

I Wish...

What if..

This is a compilation of participants: What if..

Everyone could learn and do this

    • Everyone could learn this! Even short sessions like this feel liberating.

    • everyone in the world could experience this.

    • the whole world would get on board

    • everyone could do this?

    • This reflection was more common in everyday life

    • How might we spread Empathy Circles everyone in the world could learn and experience this?

    • we didn't' need these meetings cuz the world did it naturally

    • this was taught to kids in the schools

    • the whole world would get on board

    • everyone could do this?

    • NVC was thought in schools?

    • the circles became totally widespread.

    • more people took the time to learn to be better listeners. the world would be a kinder place.

Process

    • "mix it up at least once in a while

        • regroupings

        • redo the rules - variation

        • try things and see what works

    • after a specific time we switch teams

    • or met somewhere with comfortable couches / rugs

    • we experimented with different types of communication

    • random reassignment in a circle regrouping

    • assign groups before show up and a group moderator

    • we do more formats than just reflection and have some diversity because I felt it was getting a little reparative, losing some people's interest and energy and the 3rd person can be more included.

    • people and we rotate group members

    • A period of silence after a speaker finishes - be integrated into reflection

Go Deeper

    • we could loosen up about how to give feedback and or to go a bit deeper

    • we could go into more depth about topic

Different tables for different needs

    • we had different tables that met different needs

Do Pared Empathy

    • we did paired empathic listening

    • we try to add feelings of speaker to our reflections

Do Feelings and Needs

    • Instead of reflecting exactly what the person said (which I found a bit annoying) kinda like instead of truly listening, the listeners just paraphrasing what was said how about I'm hearing that... "you feel_____ "because "you need_________" OFNR

    • we had a way to check in and evaluate the feelings behind the narrative

Do Role Play - Physical

    • we also did the physicalizations of what was said.

    • we could practice additional skills involving role-playing conflict or difficult emotions re: scenarios in our lives

    • there was a space adjacent for cathartic expressive practice, so we could get some stuff triggered. then dance it like a shaman.

    • is needs for feedback/role play/support

Dialog at End

    • conversed normally at the end

    • I try singing empathy? ask for a song as reflection.

Do Empathic Design

    • did the design crash course [ on how to redesign the Empathy Circles]

    • some people from today join the empathic design team at the HUB.

    • we got around to some different forms such as Edwin always mentions'

    • next time we do half empathic listen and half design

Do Food - Potluck

    • we did this over a meal?

    • we could do this in someone's home: it be a potluck event. yes to weekends.!!

    • meet on the weekend like a Sunday. a Friday night potluck

    • we create an empathy buddy feature for connecting people together.

    • we had a party

    • we met over a potluck at different attendees houses

Have Empathy Buddies

    • we create an empathy buddy system

I got better at it

    • I could do this to the point where if just lows a little bit better, not to the point of being a natural but to a point where I can function almost naturally?

More Empathy

    • we could find empathy easily in the rest of or lives

    • Small steps that allow people to slowly incorporate empathy into their lives

    • there was a focus on empathy in addition to reflective listening

Explore Self Empathy

    • we worked on self empathy

Quieter

    • find a quieter space

Longer-shorter meeting

    • we went a little longer when there are more (till 8:45 or 9:00pm)

    • we set the time to 2 hours

    • we added 30 minutes to the time?

Other Location

    • someone could suggest another Oakland meeting place close to Bart and wit reasonable parking

    • we could find a better place (though the food was good)

    • we could meet in someone's home

    • someone could suggest another Oakland meeting place close to Bart and with reasonable parking

    • we were in the back room\

    • HUB

        • the HUB allowed more though empathic listening and design

        • we meet at Oakland HUB.

        • people came to the empathy team at the HUB

    • Outdoors, In Nature:

        • we meet in nature, so that our discussion wouldn't be disturbed by the noise of the cafĂ©.

        • Michael organize an outside circle

        • there could be a expansive dialogue created from empathy practice

        • had this practice about forests - outdoors

        • we met in a nice weather outdoors in a community garden or my back patio.

Location Online

    • we meet online

    • we start a Facebook blog on this?

    • meet at my work/home

Different Days

    • we try this for an empathy day? how about a Sunday.

    • maybe meet during the day. Like a Sunday or Saturday

    • we have the meeting weekly. It would be great

    • we had these meetings more regular

Time Limits

    • think about a time limit of 10 minutes per round? not sure

    • there's a method/protocol where each person get's equal amount of time for being heard.

Keep meeting, expanding and building community

    • we keep meeting and growing the empathy community.

    • we keep developing and deepening the community

    • find a regular quite space. talk about how to expand the empathy cafe.

Quieter environment

    • Quieter environment

    • there was a quieter space w/ less distraction

    • we had a slightly quieter place

Parking

    • I feel to new to the group to ask for anything. - someplace with easier parking

Facilitation

    • we took turns facilitating. we share our vision for the group.

    • other people facilitate

Have Topics/Themes

    • we have a section where we talk about a bunch of predetermined topics

    • we always have a discussion topic there on meet up event even if we don't use it

    • do a theme next week

Support Resources

    • If I brought this to my communities, how could I get material and knowledge to share.

    • There were clear and outlined steps that follow the practice of empathic listening.

    • I create a empathic listening training video

Classes

    • someone offered NVC classes on campus.

Speak louder

    • everyone spoke loud enough for us all to hear.

Next Steps after empathy

    • What practice of empathy follow directly from empathic listening.

Miscellaneous

    • could do this to the point where if just flows a little bit better, not to the point of being a natural but to a point where I can function almost naturally?

    • enough people came early enough to really keep things moving.

    • more connection is less time? how

    • we keep working on making the wishes happen

    • I will think more about it.

    • we could readily appreciate radically different life experiences '

    • I could get my steamed milk to go

    • I had brought a cushion to sit on

    • we catalyzed evolution in the world creating a more respectful order