Calgary

Interview: Calgary Brown What are the needs for empathy at the HUB?

Date: 2014-04-17

Everyone is different and they have different

underlying circumstances and things

that are inspiring them and driving them,

and it’s the empathy that you use to

get to know them better.

To have a better sense of who they are.

About

Head host at Impact Hub Oakland

An avid traveler, connector and community builder, Calgary Brown is Impact Hub Oakland's Head Host and is responsible for the day to day management of our beautiful 16,000 sqft space and the amazing community within it!

Calgary has spent the last 6 years within impact driven organizations that foster and accelerate social innovation, and brings a wealth of experience to this role.

Working on collaborative work environments. Has passion is around connecting people and helping them accelerate what ever projects that they are working on to get to wherever they are going faster and more efficiently, more effective,

Working to support other people

What is the role of empathy in that?

Good question

Understanding where people are coming from when starting their projects, because the reason people have become an entrepreneur or initiated a project has many different faces. It’s either they quit their job, ended a relationship, and there is this new awakening, you have to figure what is the story behind this awakening.

Why are do what they are doing? For me I like to get the background story about who I am working with, and about this situation that I’m dealing with, because then I can relate to that person a lot better. If they are feeling down, or something is not right, I actually know that person’s background so I really try to take the time to really get to know the members. Particularly within the Hub because everybody got this different back story.

You know they lost their job or somebody died in their family, or they had sibling that had such and such issue which has lead them to do this. Everybody is on this different journey, and this different path and it’s not just what you see. You got to open the book and read it. And by taking that extra step is where my empathy comes into play. If that makes any sense?

Everyone is different and they have different underlying circumstances and things that are inspiring them and driving them, and it’s the empathy that you use to get to know them better. To have a better sense of who they are.

Yeah, especially when any kind of conflicts arises or there is a situation, or whatever. It’s developing that relationship and taking the time to really get to know where they are coming from. And then I can say, ok, I know you have gone through this, - let’s work out this solution. I understand where you are coming from, what you are going through, it helps. When situations get sticky. (laughter)

Your empathizing so you’re getting the back story, but then that helps you if there’s some kind of a problem come up you are able to reference what you know about them. It gives you something to work with? So empathy is a way of getting that understanding?

4:00And why is that important to you to have that understanding and support people?

For me, I’m always interested in people unique stories, and their journey. I’m personally interested. Some people many not want to take the time to get to know people at that deeper level, but like I do. It is a natural interest of mine, because everybody who comes into this space, or any impact hub space, they have a very unique journey that got them there. In understanding that journey it is easy for me to empathize with our members and create community. It is also a community building tool for me because there are times when I have to have the not so comfortable conversations with people, (Laugh) around policies or whatever and I can approach people with a level of authenticity, in having taken the time to really get to know who they are and their back story.

It’s about community and authenticity?

Yes, these are like my neighbors, right. When neighbors actually got to know each other they empathize with each other. If a neighbor didn’t have any food or need to borrow this or that. That is your support network. We are all each others support network here. It’s really important that when our members succeed, whatever success looks like, it doesn't mean just their business making lots of money or whatever.

Whatever success means, when they are successful we are successful, and we all have to be each others system. It is a network and we are all intertwined. If I have empathy with the membership and my community here, it is going to make our purpose, and what we are here to do, that much more effective.

Empathy helps with the effectiveness of making community and the community creates a sense of support, everyone supporting each other. And that is something that you value is a sense of community and support. And why is community and support important?

Because, our equity is build on the value of our connections, and like it is not so much money is equity as well. I want people to walk in here and be able to just know everybody in the room. That is extremely valuable when you come into community and you need help with whatever project or initiative that your are trying to build. You want to come into a connected community. So everybody getting to know each other understanding where people are at, having these deep conversations, and connecting is like our equity.

And that is extremely valuable as an organization. It’s not so much like, ‘yeah we got this many members, and we are making X amount of money,” but another part of success for us is how connected our community is and how they’re connecting with each other. It’s not just come in here, get on your laptop and just work and be in a silo,, it’s about like creating the gatherings and the activities that get our members connecting which then creates that community.

[build empathic equity]It’s really about creating community, connection and that is the value and the equity that your are seeing within the organization? Is that within yourself too, personally?

It’s a network, equity and resource you can draw on in your life?

Because that is what we sell. That is our value proposition. This is a physical workspace for you to do your work, but there is this community that you can easily tap into that is highly intelligent and connected. Really, community driven and community focussed and people want to have an impact in the local community here in Oakland and beyond. Very skilled members, meaning we have people who are lawyers, marketing experts, social media experts, website development & business experts.

When you come in here instead of it taking you 2 years to get where you are going, we will accelerate that and you’ll get there in 6 months. Because all you have to do is talk with a few folks in the room and then you’ll be connected to X, Y, Z whatever you need. And that is highly valuable to somebody that is starting something up and want’s to be agile and kind of do it quickly and not have it take forever to launch something. We want to launch good fast, right.

So empathy is kind of like a gateway into that, because you're having empathy and you're bringing people together, you’re seeing what their story is, what their journey is. It’s like a gateway into building that whole constellation of feelings and community.

What do you see could be done to create more empathy?

From where it is to even accelerate it?

Role playing the HUB? What needs do you have as the HUB for increasing your empathy?

I can only think of this from a very practical standpoint. I think what is needed (and we discussed this with our colleagues) is more intentional communication, particularly with our office members and our anchor members. Providing the appropriate communication for them to understand what is going on in the external environment that might be impacting their experience here so that when stuff happens they understand where we are coming from as a physical building. A lot of stuff is happening around that can cause a lot of frustration because of the construction and stuff. It’s recognizing that we need to have an intimate conversation with our anchor tenants and say ok.. this is what is going on.. once they have that communication they can have empathy for what is going on.

[hub needs to share what is going on]

Anchor tenants have individual offices. They are here everyday, M-F everyday.. They are the ones most affected by the various logistical issues, construction, parking issues, whatever. They are bringing in the most guests, they using conference rooms more than anyone else. They are physically using the space more heavily than our other member groups. co working members. They are a very special group to nurture and create that empathy path.

We’ve only been open for 7 weeks, there is a lot that is happening, construction still needs to happen in the space. Policies around guests, the use of the privacy booths, and so there is better communication that needs to happen. Which a town hall meeting would initiate a discussion and address some of their concerns. For them to know that we all need to get together and have a chat. Not something negative but that we are listening to you and we have heard the concerns and we want to bring everyone together and let’s just figure out what your needs are and we will let you know where we are at with things so that everybody is on the same page.

More ways of having dialog, and maybe a town hall is one way to have those dialogs? Are there other ways of having dialogs?

I’m interested in more intimate gatherings so I’m focusing on programing that brings people together in small groups.. be that morning mingles, for members to share what they are working on and their stories. Like to have more members dinners. Small table. Looking for those intimate like gatherings. It’s fine to have the bigger events but that not what creates empathy, that is not what creates a social connections that are needed to build the equity within the community. Because also those smaller events create the stickyness so that we shouldn't have to be working on looking for new members. We should keep what we have as a business. I want to create events, and hold the space for the intimate connections and gatherings to be taking place.

It’s about creating an empathic intimacy then?

We are physically designing that into the space. Create physical manifestations of that.

What is the feeling of empathy?

As a felt bodily sensation?

When was a peak empathic moment?

Almost everyday people say “I totally understand what you’re feeling.” I almost get that every single day from the offices.

Story 1:

When we were trying to get keys for all the offices for their doors and it was taking forever. people had to share keys. They constantly couldn’t get into their offices because the other office memeber had the keys. So it was like month or more of me having to give out my key to the members who couldn’t get into thier offices. An they were the best… they were pushing

“ when are we going to get our keys..”

“I’m so sorry we are having really big issues ordering the keys. They are giving us the hardest times… we’re sorry, we’re sorry..”

All the office members were so sympathetic to the situation that we were going through.

Story 1:

The side door broke. The access keycard door wasn't’ working, and everyone here was really understanding. It was awesome. It was like a stress relief. Because my shoulders would tensed up and when the members we’re like,

“don’t worry about it, we totally understand”

I was like “ok, this is good, our members are awesome, they’re understanding, nobodies like yelling or going berserk.” But then it’s like I let them use my key, I’m also trying to find solutions. But all of them were supportive. It’s because I think that I’ve taken the time to have lunch, with some of the members and like build relationships. So when shit happens, they are like “ok fine’.

So having empathy, hearing about people, making those connections, came around when there was a stressful situation people had a lot of understanding. And that understanding was a stress reliever?

That is why I am a proponent of sitting down getting to know all the various members because when shit hits the fan they are going to be understanding because you have taken the them out for coffee or you had the side conversation and gotten to know them. So they are your friends and so, when stuff goes wrong you can tell them what’s going on and for the most part they'll be understanding. But I’m also providing what the solution is.

Story 3, Another thing is our power went out last week.. the construction guys were digging and hit the main power line and shut us down. …. Internet goes down… we had to tell everyone.. Nobody got pissed off. people found workaround. We bought ice cream and everyone came to the kitchen and had root beer floats. That ‘crisis’ moment we took it as an opportunity to create community.

What questions would you ask about empathy?

Like in the hub I’m always looking for the person who is going to blow up in my face. And like strategies on how creating empathy in those really intense moments. I haven’t had a completely intense moment but it is in those intense moments that you become really challenged from an empathic standpoint.

In really challenging situations how do you bring empathy into those situations?

I think there are things you have to prepare beforehand to be able to do that.

How do you prepare for those difficult and challenging moments?

is it through meditation, or yoga practice, or something so that you can be calm and not blow up.

It hasn’t happened to you but your thinking about it? you want to be prepared?

OOOO yeah.. somebody that absolutely blows up.

thank you..

I hope it helps..

Notes

“[say, let me know if I’m hearing and understanding you.]

[I could have said “is there more?”]

[I’m noticing that the ‘why?’ questions seem to really help in digging deeper and getting to a core feeling]