Moe's Mexican

Moe's Southwest Grill: How to waste MOEst of your paycheck

Go ahead, read the title again. Those words are not deceiving you. My experience at Moe’s Southwest Grill, as well as the experiences of countless other South Riding residents, is one that has repeatedly been riddled with shortcomings and definite issues. The hot dumpster heap of garbage that is Moe’s Southwest Grill is the product of numerous, multi-faceted issues. And, frankly, those layered issues communicate the message that Moe’s Southwest Grill is no longer an acceptable dining establishment.

Once my extremely unpleasant, and seemingly never-ending, dining experience at Moe’s finally comes to a conclusion, it is more than clear that I have just wasted my time, breath, and money.

Walking into Moe’s Southwest Grill is similar to walking into a deserted ghost town from the mid 1800’s. Although you can sense that there was an extremely profitable hay day, or at least a time where management was breaking even, it is abundantly clear that such a day is never going to come again during your lifetime. Similar to how the local government of a ghost town gave up on the future of the town, the management at Moe’s gave up their chances of being a profitable establishment.

Random trash and sticky, multi-colored beans are littered everywhere, employees are clearly hiding behind the kitchen doors rather than working, and the lack of human presence in the building’s main dining area upon entry makes me feel as if I have just landed on Krypton. So, at least Moe’s Southwest Grill does a somewhat adequate job of making you feel as if you are on a strange alien planet. However, from a consumer’s perspective, I feel as if I have made the mistake of walking into this establishment and wasting my precious, nonrenewable time.

Sure, you can move past the lack of customers and lack of common cleanliness in the restaurant. Although nearly impossible, there is still a very small chance that it’s a slow day or the last customer spilled their dinner and didn’t clean up after themselves.

However, the service is an entirely different issue altogether. Walking up to the menu without knowing what you want to buy yet makes you subject to looks and judging as if you are an ex-convict that is now roaming the streets. You are treated like a stranger of some kind who has arbitrarily found themselves in a fancy dining establishment. Even asking a single question is apparently unacceptable since the staff who work at Moe’s Southwest Grill will snicker and laugh with each other like a rabid pack of hyenas who haven’t eaten in days. Finally, when attempting to merely throw your trash away or even sit at a table, you will notice that there is enough food on the floor to feed an entire village in a country abroad for an entire week. All of this culminates into the obvious unwritten understanding that there is no respect whatsoever that is given by the staff to their esteemed, and extremely rare, customers.

Although the aforementioned aspects of Moe’s Southwest Grill speak volumes about the truly horrendous state of the restaurant, the nail in the coffin for this business is, ironically, their main selling point: food. The food at Moe’s tastes like something I could buy off of a cart vendor who could set up shop right in front of Moe's Southwest Grill and sell for ten times less. The lettuce’s lack of moisture leaves your mouth feeling like Death Valley on a hot July day. Putting a spoon of white rice on your lips makes you feel as if you have just taken a sip out of the Dead Sea’s salt reservoirs. Moe’s claims that their free chips are a steal, but the only thing they’re stealing is your money. The chips are only free with an entree and taste as bland as the taste of chewing a piece of stale, old whole wheat bread. Also, walking through the assembly line system that Moe’s Southwest Grill utilizes makes me feel as if I am being handheld and taken through a YouTube tutorial on how to waste every last dollar in my wallet and make my stomach suffer for the next day as well. Furthermore, the menu items themselves are as overpriced as college textbooks (both things that your average consumer cannot afford in bulk for the quality given). For a restaurant, these kinds of food products or foodstuffs being sold is completely and utterly unforgivable.

Some loyal Moe’s consumers may bring up the argument that it is authentic to its roots in Southwest America. However, such an argument is utterly ridiculous. The quality control at Moe’s Southwest Grill is practically non existent and the ingredients scream outdated or not fresh. What part of the already mentioned details tells the consumer that Moe’s is an authentic restaurant? None of the parts of the machine that is Moe’s can even lead you to that conclusion. Moreover, you cannot expect any fast-food establishment in South Riding,Virginia to be authentic to Mexican or Southwestern cuisine. Such a compromise is just not possible in today’s world at the moment.

Every single aspect of Moe’s Southwest Grill is flawed in multiple ways and begs the question of what you truly are doing there. Why go to Moe’s? Ask yourself that question next time before you walk into their truly disgusting and vile establishment. I mean that in every way possible: environment, service, and food. Do not waste your time. Do not waste your money. Do not waste an ounce of effort. Turn away from the entrance before you pull open that greasy, germ-ridden door handle.

Moe's Southwest Grill

24995 Riding Plaza

South Riding, VA, 20152