MYP5 Presentation Chaos

Transcript by Lee Kurm

You’re on track with your unit, reading deadlines have been met, students have been behaving decently well, everyone is ready for the next formative, and then it’s the holidays! Why not take a class to relax – breathe and stretch, as the Bard himself says before each lesson. 

Well, that might have been the Bard’s plan. But tell the MYP5s to make a one-minute presentation about anything, and I promise you, all shall descend into CHAOS.

Thanks to the combined wonders of filming and transcription, you can now also enjoy this chaos!

Zofia Wozniak – Flowers:

So, I do a presentation about flowers; it was the first thing that came to my mind. So basically, they are beautiful, they can make you feel special – especially when you get flowers for a rare occasion. They smell good – I mean, some of them, some of them… well… depends on what you prefer. And roses and peonies, on top, the best flowers that could ever… so, yeah!

Garance Schmitz – The Hunger Games: 

Okay, so, basically “The Hunger Games” uh, book one there’s the summary [points to summary], it’s about barararara. [Laughter from audience]. And… [Garance joins the laughter] book one, book two, book three, and then book four which is technically one because it’s the history before. Uh, I own all of the books, I’ve watched all of the movies, I have this poster, uh, that’s two times me in my room. Um, I love “Hunger Games”, voilà!

Juan de la Vega Paspalanova – Fortnite Lore:

So, I’m gonna be talking about Fortnite lore! Um, so first there was nothing and then there was like a big ball and then basically that created the world and then, uh, a cube, that cube [points to picture of purple cube] tried to eat the like ball, but then like the cube died. And then these two guys fought [points to vs. picture] over like the big ball. Then I stopped playing for a while, but then The Rock appeared in Fortnite [laughter from Elna] and I got the skin and then the Galactus guy tried eating it. And then this guy also tried stealing the ball, because, I don’t know why everyone wants it. And then, uh, this is a very big streamer [points at picture], his name’s Ninja and he has a [Garance [screams from behind cameraperson, making Juan laugh]: And he has a low taper fade, I said it! Mr. Jo: Shh!] and he has a low taper fade. And, uh, I also use this skin [points to picture], and I also have this one [points to picture] – they’re my two favourite skins. And I’m also … three in Fortnite! [Thumbs up].

Laurynas Freigofas – Kanye West:

Alright, so Kanye West, aka The Greatest Rapper of All Time. This man has never missed – in twenty years he dropped the best albums of all time; “Graduation”, the greatest album of all time. [Laughter from Juan]. He literally made Taylor Swift. He- he is so influential that-that he got cancelled like so many times, but he still came back, he perceived [editor note: persevered [probably]]. Like, have you seen this sexy man – look at the pictures. He made the greatest albums of all time. And I will forever love this man. [1]

Lee Kurm – Overthinking:

Overthinking. The Oxford English Dictionary defines it as “thinking about something too much or for too long”. Originally comes from Old English – oferþenan. With, uh, þencan mean- sort of meaning thinking – with Germanic, Saxon, and Nor… Norse roots. And ofer meaning above or over, with Germanic roots. Transformed into overthenchen in Middle English, um, meaning, in combination: to grieve, have regrets, be sorry, be anxious. And now, in Modern English we have overthinking, which we do all the time. [2]

Sarah Petocchi – A Flamboyance of Flamingos:

I got inspired… that’s it. [Laurynas: Aah… Mr. Jo: Here goes, Sarah!] Uh, I’ve nothing to say. [Mr. Jo: Nothing to say about the flamingo?] No. [Mr. Jo: Would you like to read the joke? Garance: What do you call a flamboyance of fla-] Um, what do you call a flamboyance of flamingo in a band? Pink Floyd! [Mia: I like that. Garance [enthusiastically clapping, joined by others]: I love Pink Floyd, come on, let’s go!]

Nathan De Pauw – Chess:

Okay, hi, this is chess. What is chess? Chess is a board game, often confused with checkers – it’s not checkers though. Um, this guy [points at picture] dominates it – he’s also the hottest man in Norway, by the way. [Laughter, followed by technical difficulties]. Yeah, okay, so – what? – this man, hot, Norway, um, more pictures of him, because yes. Um, this is Hikaru Nakamura, also known as the fastest player of chess and the hottest man from Japan. Um, here’s more pictures of him. Something, uh, happened, uh… This is chess.com! This is where everyone usually plays chess online. Uh, there’s also something called Lichess – Lichess to chess.com players – well, chess.com to chess.com players is heaven, and Lichess to them is Russia. Other way around. Something happened a while ago – chess boom, uh, because of this [points to picture] because of this movie – I think a couple – not movie, series. Uh, and this guy as well [points to picture], by the way: his name is GothamChess and he is the hottest man from somewhere. [laughter] Uh… I had a week [alarum bell rings, Mr. Jo: Stop!] Okay!

Raphaël Bédard – Playboi Carti, G.O.A.T Rapper:

All right, so, I’m gonna talk about The Greatest Rapper of All Time, Playboi Carti. Uh, his discography, his best albums, well, his only albums, is: Playboi Carti (self-titled), 2017 [laughter], Die Lit, 2018, and Whole Lotta Red. His full name is Jordan Terrell Carter, he was born in September 13, 1995 and he founded OPIUM. [Laughter]. On December 25, 2020, he got one of the most influential albums ever, Whole Lotta Red. As you can see here, Greatest Album of All Time. And now, um, he’s supposed to drop an album – he hasn’t dropped for like four years now [laughter] – but anyways, um, hopefully he drops. As you can see [points to picture] God even telling him he’s the best in the world. That’s [points to graph] the cycle we’re in right now… and yeah that’s it.

Raphaël Wallez – Racoons:

Guys, so, apparently there’s been a gang of racoons [Ginevra: What?] attacking a certain person – which I will not name, but that is clearly Mr. Jo, which we can see because of his shirt [gasps from the audience], he is trying to not be seen by anyone! So, this is the gang of racoons, there’s plenty of pictures of cac- of racoons, because I have nothing to do with my time and um… it’s very dangerous, be careful, okay! It’s tracking Mr. Jo, so, really… [laughter] guys, keep safe! It’s near the school! [laughter] They will get you! They will get you! All of you! 

Mia Chitishvili – Direct Tax Evasion Methods:

So, we really like our money, right? But in adulthood taxes are gonna be [laughter from audience] something that we’ll all have to deal with – so, I’m gonna teach you how to avoid that. I’m not responsible for anything, so if you get in trouble, look for the last point! [high-pitched laughter from Elna] So, do not tell anyone about your tax fraud plans! And keep it for yourself – even family, [laughter] they might want your tax refunds. Keep a good image in front government bodies! So, audits and examinations are not a random, they’re, uh, they’re consistent. Be consistent! Be good at mathematics! [laughter and groans] You have to know how records should be if you want a tax refund. Keep good reference of, yeah, refund taxes. These are not numbers you can, uh, make up, but you can – sorry – keep paperwork out of it. Make sure to forge fake identities if you get in trouble with the government and you need to move countries! Don’t come to me for information about that! [Laughter]. And the last resort is robbery or murder of a government official that is accusing you of tax fraud! So, this is it…

Elna Samira Alvarado – How does Chapter I of the Archon Quest related to Fahrenheit 451?:

Well, how does the Archon Quest of Genshin Impact relate to Fahrenheit 451? It’s called the Immovable God of- of- the Immovable God and the Eternal Euthymia because the- the God of thunder, locked away herself for 500 years because her sister died and so she then implemented two decrees. One that took away the Visions (which I will explain later) and the other one is that people cannot get in- in or out. When someone look- when one of the Gods looks at you with favour, they will see your ambition and grant you a Vision which makes you able to control the elements. Uh, in the trailer of the Archon Quest it is said that “a person’s Vision represents their ambition”. Later on, when they talk about someone about the decree: “for to be stripped of one’s Vision is to be stripped of one’s ambition” meaning that they cannot go against the- the God of, uh, Inazuma’s ideals of eternity. And so, even when people get their Visions stripped away it is, um, described as a feeling of emptiness, or something is wrong [Mr. Jo: Stop.] I think you guys can see…

Lilla Radics – Chicago Rat Hole:

[Laughter from audience]. As evidence suggests, this is a rat-shaped hole in Chicago. Uh, this is what it looks like. It went viral in the beginning of 2024 and people started leaving offerings, as seen here [points to picture; laughter and gasps]. They left coins, flowers, candles, cheese, cigarettes, alcohol, children’s toys, food [Ginevra, muttering: children’s toys?] and um pills. There’s a pill [points to picture], I don’t know why, but like, yeah. Apparently this isn’t actually a rat – according to locals it was a squirrel who fell from a tree [indistinct noises from audience] into the cement, but it looks like a rat. And yeah, that’s it, thank you. 

Carmen Marin Alfaro – Teen Girls:

So, the struggles of a teen girl. First of all, when you put on lip gloss and then it’s windy and then all your hair gets stuck to it. Then, when your nail breaks and then it gets stuck to everything. Then, not being able to wake up cause it’s way too early. Then, not being able to keep your room clean. Then going to school looking gorgeous and then coming back looking like a McDonald’s worker [laughter from teen girls in the audience]. This, like when your mascara smudges [Ginevra: That’s me.] and not being able to choose your perfume in the morning. And, um, being so materialistic you can’t stop shopping.

Hippolyte Schmitz – Star Wars:

Alright, this is gonna be a presentation about Star Wars. It’s a series of nine movies, that are about two teams – Jedi, uh, who want to bring order into, like, the galaxy, and Sith wanted to rule it. Anakin Skywalker is chosen to… “the chosen one” by everybody, uh, and then he becomes bad because of Palpatine, which is like this “political” guy, but he was hiding and he’s actually bad. Next, he gets sent to, like, Order 66 by everybody and he loses, becomes Darth Vader, has twins. The twins actually fall in love – it’s kinda incest, but… [laughter from audience] And then, uh, yeah… Luke Skywalker, like, fights his father, loses, gets his hand cut off. Uh… he finds out that it’s his father, rejects to rule the galaxy, and uh becomes Jedi and fights the Sith. And these [points to pictures] are all my favourite characters.

Ginevra Trovesi – Surfing:

So, I made a presentation about surfing and here’s some, uh, reasons why you should do surfing as well. Because surfing makes you fit, it makes you confident, and it makes you patient. And then there’s also a study that tells you that surfing makes you happier. So, guys, do surfing, I’m telling you!

[1] Laurynas has asked me to note: ""Runaway" is the best Kanye song."

[2] As this is my own presentation, I shall take the liberty to add the fun fact that the earliest recorded definition for overthinking seems to be: “exhaust oneself with too much thinking”. Which is simply wonderful.