Ask Blair is an advice column run by a GPHS student under the alias of Blair. Its purpose is to provide advice to students in search of it. Keep in mind that your responses will most likely be in the next issue of The Scroll. Scroll below to see the answers for last issue's questions
Last year, we launched the advice column Ask Blair! Everything is 100% anonymous, including my own identity. Though I go by Blair for the purpose of the column, I wouldn’t be surprised if many of you know me outside of The Scroll. I’m a student at GPHS, just like all of you. My goal for the column is to reach out to you guys and do what I can to help you during your times of trouble. Don’t be afraid to send in questions for next month’s issue, and I look forward to writing for you guys in the months to come. Scroll down to enter your own questions for me, Blair!
*A Note from Blair: Since I reach such a wide audience and cater to people of so many different lifestyles and beliefs, it is my goal to remain as unbiased as possible when giving advice. It is for that reason that I ask you refrain from asking for my personal opinions on politics and the like, as I don't want that to get in the way of being able to help as many people as possible. Thank you for helping me keep Ask Blair! a safe space for everyone!
*Editor's Note: The Scroll's Ask Blair! Column is to solely provide advice, care, and support to students in need. We want to hear from you, and we understand that some of the topics that will be discussed will be emotional and sometimes distressing, but this advice column is not meant to be used as an alternative to any sort of professional therapy or counseling.
Thank you 💜
Our goal at the Scroll is to give everyone a voice. If you feel like you’d want to write advice, even though the official Blair position is taken, I would love to have someone to help out and give me input! Come to one of our meetings and ask us questions! I’m sure we can find a way for you to work at the Scroll, either in this column or otherwise, in a way that makes you feel fulfilled.
A personal motto of mine is that just because someone else has thought of something first, doesn’t make them the best for the job. The first version of any project is never the best. I would love to have your help running the column and making it the best version of itself!
Hi, BlueFace! This question is a little vague, but I think I can help. There are tons of universal ways to charm crushes that I’d like to introduce you to.
For starters, with girls (and with anyone, for that matter), it’s generally a good idea to avoid being too pushy. Mutual respect and consent is a big deal, and if you can only take one thing away from this response, I ask that this be it. I’m not saying you have to prepare yourself to be let down, but just know that no means no, and if you’re rejected, you need to accept it.
Okay, now that that’s out of the way, what can you do to avoid rejection? This depends a lot on the girl! Some girls are charmed easily, and some take time and patience to win their heart. Small acts of thoughtfulness can be a great way to catch their attention. Find out their favorite snack or treat, and if you see it at the store, get some for them! Offer to carry something for them if their hands are full. Be there for them when they’re having a rough day (ask if they need to vent, if they want advice, if they just need someone to sit with them). Compliments can go a long way, but be careful about exactly what you choose to compliment. The general rule of thumb is to compliment their choices, not the things they can’t control. For instance, compliment their outfit, how they did their hair that day, etc, but don’t compliment their body, because that can be uncomfortable. Take an interest in the things they like! Listen to them rant about their favorite TV show, and play their music when you hang out instead of your own. This one might not be as universal, but one of the sweetest things someone could do for me, personally, is make me a playlist. It could be a way to subtly confess, or just introduce them to something you think they’d like.
When you feel like you’ve gotten close enough (which, again, can take time and patience! Use your best judgment, but don’t worry if it seems to be taking a while), it might be time to confess! Confessing doesn’t have to be a huge deal, but how you go about it can make or break the relationship. If you want to do something grand, get them alone and give them flowers. If you want it to be more casual, just turn to them one day, when you think the moment is right, and just say it. Again, remember what I said before; don’t feel bad if you’re rejected. Maybe it’s the right person at the wrong time. Give them time, but don’t bring it up again unless it’s absolutely eating you up inside. Make sure they know you respect their decision, and you will still be there for them as a friend.
If they decide to reciprocate your feelings, congratulations! You got the girl! Just remember that basic kindness and small acts of thoughtfulness can go a long way. Good luck, and as always, keep me updated! ;)
(Also, side note, can I get some more of y’all using code names? I just think it’s cool.)
Abe and I are obviously in the Scroll together, so I’d consider him a friend. He has a Scholars Column, where he advertises scholarship opportunities for students, and a Job Listings column, for GP residents looking for employment! Readers, I recommend giving them both a look while you’re here.
