Christmas Mixtape

While working at various music stores through the years I was subjected to a whole lot of really bad music. (For the record, I also discovered quite a bit of good stuff.) Every company I ever worked for (save Wooden Nickel) had the same holiday tradition of forcing their employees to play Christmas music around the clock for a month or so. This wasn’t a total loss, as I often found some pretty excellent tunes. One season in particular, I decided not to hate holiday music. I let my guard down, and more or less, these were the songs I walked away with: “Run, Run Rudolph” by Chuck Berry. This song’s inclusion in the epic Christmas film, Home Alone, was my first conscious exposure to Chuck Berry. I was 10 and pretty certain that Macaulay Culkin was my soul brother. I was wrong, but John Hughes-penned films soon after began shaping my adolescence, and Berry’s classic holiday rocker has stuck with me ever since. You know this song; I don’t need to tell you how good it is.

“Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want to Fight Tonight)” by The Ramones. The Ramones really seemed to have a thing for Christmas, which isn’t surprising considering their love for cheekiness and pop craft. Basically, if Phil Spector did it (see The Ronettes’ “Frosty the Snowman,” amongst many other holiday songs), then The Ramones could do it. Play this song in between Joey Ramone’s “What a Wonderful World” and Keith Richard’s take on “Run Rudolph Run.” Holiday bliss.

Emmet Otter’s Jug-Band Christmas. This is actually a film produced by Jim Henson’s production company that featured garage sale puppeteer work and a slew of excellent songs, including an unforgettable Alice Cooper-esqe song by The River Bottom Nightmare Band (yes, we have a band in town that took this name as their own) and a few folk songs from Emmet Otter’s Jug Band. If you haven’t seen it, it was finally released on DVD last season.

“Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” by Harry Connick, Jr. I’ve never really been a fan of Connick’s music, but his holiday album is one that we played at the music store every year. I hate to say it, but it’s brilliant, and this song in particular – which has also been performed with great success by both Diana Krall and The Pretenders – is excellent. Even better, though, is Jr.’s second holiday single, “(It Must’ve Been Ol’) Santa Claus,” which is one of my personal top 10 holiday songs of all time. Check out Jr.’s excellent When My Heart Finds Christmas album.

“Christmas Island” and “A Sailor’s Christmas” by Jimmy Buffett. A quick stint with Buffett’s music in the eighth grade was enough for me, at least until I heard the tropical, hilarious and seasonal sounds of his holiday album, Christmas Island. It’s authentic beach music about Santa pulling up to shore in a canoe full of presents. Sure, it sounds dumb, but give it a chance – I dare ya. (If nothing else, you have to hear “Up On the House Top,” which features Buffett yelling “Tubular dude” and other such things at Ol’ Saint Nick in the most clichéd surfer voice he can manage.)

“Bizzare Christmas Incident” by Ben Folds. It shouldn’t surprise regular Ease readers at all that this is my personal favorite holiday song – but only because Steve Earle’s “Christmastime in Washington” isn’t a holiday song at all. Folds’ holiday original is funny, bouncy and seasonal in its own dorky way. My co-workers at Musicland used to let me play this song several times a day because of the hilarious customer reaction it so often prompted. As far as other “cool” holiday music goes, The Smashing Pumpkins’ “Christmas Time” is more than stellar, as is “Just Like Christmas” by Low. You can find said Low song on the holiday soundtrack to “The O.C.” And while I wont ever endorse anything else having to do with this particular show about privileged life in Orange County, I will admit that the holiday album they released was full of “cool” songs by “cool” bands.

“Blue Christmas” by Bright Eyes. Similar to the Orange County compilation, there has been a series of holiday albums called Maybe This Christmas that feature indie-cool bands. This song – made popular by Elvis Presley’s swagger and catchy backup singers – was included on the first installment of the series. Also on the first installment was the previously mentioned Folds’ song, a Coldplay tune and Jack Johnson’s version of “Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer.” If you’re not a fan of Folds, Coldplay or Johnson, you can get the Bright Eyes song from www.saddle-creek.com via an incredibly mediocre holiday album that isn’t worth your cash.

“The Christmas Song” by The Raveonettes. This cut by one of the most mediocre critical darlings in recent memory has quickly shot to the top of a lot of younger folks’ lists of favorite holiday songs, including my own. It’s simple, it’s short and it’s sweet. Imagine if the Velvet Underground had made a radio-friendly holiday song in 1969.

“That Was the Worst Christmas Ever!” by Sufjan Stevens. I’ve made a tradition out of buying an album I overlooked throughout the year each Christmas Eve, last year it was Seven Swans by Sufjan Stevens. Before this purchase I had bought Stevens’ Greetings from Michigan album (twice) with no luck. I just didn’t “get it.” After buying Swans I found myself stuck in the Glenbrook Mall parking lot, too much snow and too many cars to be able to leave. Two hours later I had listened to Swans almost three times. Within a week not only had I bought Michigan for a third time, but I had fallen in love with it. To me, it sounded like a Christmas album, so I wasn’t surprised at all when Stevens posted four free holiday EPs online last year. Less than a year has passed since then, and Stevens has recorded 11 more holiday songs and released the lot as a five-disc set with a slew of bells and whistles under the title of Songs for Christmas. The whole set is available for only $20 and features the aforementioned “worst” song, as well as 41 other songs, 10 or so of which are on par with Stevens’ best work.

Classics that aren’t annoying: “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” by Brenda Lee; “Jingle Bell Rock” by Bobby Helms; “A Holly, Jolly Christmas” by Burl Ives; “Happy Xmas (War is Over)” by John Lennon and Yoko Ono; “Father Christmas” by The Kinks; “White Christmas” by Bing Crosby; “Sleigh Ride” by The Ventures; “Little Saint Nick” by The Beach Boys. (Also check out Brian Wilson’s holiday album, What I Really Want for Christmas.)

Must-hear novelty cuts: “The 12 Days of Chrismas” by The Muppets; “The Chipmunk Song” by The Chipmunks; “Christmas at Ground Zero” by Weird Al Yankovic; “The Twelve Days of Christmas” by Bob and Doug McKenzie; “O Come Ye Grateful Dead-Heads” by Bob Rivers.

Written by G. William Locke