Fusion 5
Can you feel the friction between ‘what is’ and ‘what should be’ (past or future)? Can you see that this friction, this gap, this sense of uneasiness can not be escaped or satisfied? To see this is your attunement to supreme relaxation, to the limitless field.
Energy is singular. Anger, fear, pleasure, confusion and so on- all expressions of energy are frictions in the energy. This friction sustains life. No expression can be held as absolute. The illusion seeks calculated stability through expressions as if pleasure will stay and anger, fear, sorrow will be eliminated. It uses ideas, explanations to secure calculated stability.
When this attempt is aborted or when one faces a situation where no idea, explanation is able to cover up intense pleasure or sorrow, singular energy may put its imprint.
Action is relaxed and conscious as energy is not frittered away in securing calculated stability. There is opening up to the limitless field.
Seeking ends and authentic living starts when you do not postpone, when you stop all questions ‘about existence’ not because of your inability to find the answer but because the questioner is not separate from existence, from ‘what is happening’. ‘You’ is the total field of Existence. Who will question whom?
Can you bear the jerk that -There is nothing behind ‘what is happening’, ‘what you are feeling’. There is nothing behind the structure ‘you and the world’.
You are tense (that is, you want to become complacent) because you think your pain will be over by addition to securities, by going to temple, by reading spiritual books, by practicing some technique or by going to some Guru.
Can you see that ‘you’ are in pain (psychological discomfort) and running here and there to undo it, to solve it, to seek a way out of it?
This is the end of you. The end of you is your connection to the Original.
Can you see that you are depending upon others, upon your own ideas, upon favourable situations to come to stable relief, to come to the Truth? Can the brain gather energy to let go this dependence, this comfort? You have touched the Original.
You are safe and secured at this moment. You can imagine (the details)-what you will do tomorrow, what will happen tomorrow. The field of imagination is fluid. The error is that one begins to confirm tomorrow’s security through thinking, calculations, prayers. Thus imagination is vitiated. In fact, when the confirmation of tomorrow’s security is seen as false, imagination becomes clear and strong. One is the on self-sustained ground.
When pain (any uneasy feeling) is not labeled as pain, see what happens- it is movement of energy in you. This movement is on the self-sustained ground. Life energy is drained out of you not when you face pain or discomfort but when you complain, blame, feel guilty or try to escape it by hoping for good future.
There is no safe and secured way to live, to operate. You have to act (or not act) and see what happens. Mind is under the illusion as if addition to securities (possessions, relations) will keep the unknown at bay. To see that margin for the unknown can not be covered up is your attunement to supreme relaxation, to the self-sustained ground.
Anything that is being promised as a panacea for your ‘present unsatisfactory state’ is the bondage to pain from which one is running. Once you stop the running away, the whole energy is concentrated. You are one with Life now.
Living is sensational from moment to moment. One does not see this as one is busy in defining the moments as satisfactory or unsatisfactory. Thus misses the touch of the Original.
Can one see the arising of thoughts-‘things may not happen as ‘I’ wish’, ‘something untoward may happen’, ‘I’ may be cheated’ and so on? The uneasiness, these thoughts generate in the form of fear, insecurity can not be dealt with, escaped or undone. You are on the self-sustained ground.
Now thought can not guide for action, it comes from the ground itself.
One escapes this uneasiness, the touch of the Original does not happen.
The error has taken over the present mind that it should feel happy, stay pleased, stay relieved all the time as if feeling of confusion, fear, any uneasy feeling does not belong to it. If you notice this insistence of the mind, it drops- the Original energy touches you. You are attuned to supreme relaxation with unending friction to operate.
Whatever is discovered or otherwise comes before you is not the product of thinking. Thinking is used to explain, express, communicate what is discovered or comes before you. Can one see the limit of thinking, the function of thinking? Thinking gets into the field, which does not belong to it, as--‘action is good or bad’, ‘action is difficult’, ‘it is not possible’, ‘I must do, win’, ‘If I win it is okay, otherwise also it is okay’, ‘why it has happened to me’, ‘others are not cooperative’ and so on. Thinking clouds the imagination. If the intrusion of thinking is just noticed, it dissolves, imagination becomes clear. One sees the play of imagination and Reality. This seeing is the Original ground.
Truth-the totality- is not sweet. It shines forth when you just hold the bitter, that is, do not throw it away from your mind. The illusion is busy in throwing it away; there is no place to throw it.
You can not be relaxed by holding any thing, any relation or any idea. You are attuned to supreme relaxation when you see that there is continuous change, continuous renewal (and destruction). Noticing the change (not explanation of change), noticing the renewal, noticing the micro-movement connects you to the Original ground.
You will take charge of your life only when you stop depending upon, stop seeking relief from ‘pain and uncertainty’ through entertainment, intoxications, religious and spiritual books, temples, ideas of God and so on.
Happiness and sorrow will stop dictating your mind when you see that these feelings depend upon your being ‘alive’. You are ‘alive’ and feeling something (happiness, sorrow) is the sign of life. To try to resist the feeling of sorrow or to try to retain the feeling of happiness is ‘anti-aliveness’, is dullness, decay, death.
You are projecting a comfortable future, a satisfactory future as a cover up for today’s uneasiness. Thus idea of suffering is coined. Suffering itself ends when you just stop this cover up. Now any action (or no-action) is relaxed and conscious. You have landed yourself in a magical world.
Control
‘What you face’ or ‘what is happening’ is not under your control-this is simple to understand. Realisation happens when you notice that what you ‘feel’, ‘experience’ is also not under your control.
You are physically safe and secured now. Any insecurity, uncertainty, discomfort you are experiencing is only psychological, that is, it is in respect of future. To be comfortable with this insecurity, uncertainty is to ‘feel’ complete security now. One is on the self-sustained ground. Touch of the Original has happened.
There is processing, the movement going on in everything including the brain. Even in stationary things, in every material, in every natural thing. What you feel (anger, anxiety, confusion and so on) from moment to moment is also a process, a movement.
Who is controlling, operating this movement? Or How to set right this process? This question itself is a movement, a process. There is no way, you can separate yourself from the process. There is only the process, the movement.
Thought can refer to anything. It can name anything, describe anything. It can not know its own source. It can not know from where it is arising. Any reference about its source will be a thought. You are at the end of the mind. You can not go further. You have touched the Original ground.
You have a touch of the Original when you face (psychological) risk ‘as it is’. Allowing (psychological) risk is your attunement to complete security.
One uses the word God or takes shelter in the ideas about God as if it refers to something. As it does not refer to anything-one can mould the word as one likes, hence religion as organization is born. Unless we are clear that God does not refer to anything-we will be fighting in the name of religion, ideology, ideas about God.
Brain understands only in terms of desire. Any fulfillment of desire can not put it in the fulfilled state. All spiritual talks or advances in technology or more information give one the illusion as if it will reach at a fulfilled state. Arising of desire is the life energy itself. Desire-fulfilment, disturbance-adjustment is the self-sustained ground. Seeing this attunes one to supreme relaxation.
Every moment, two possibilities exist. Something you want may happen or it may not happen. That is, positive and negative thoughts are there. In unawareness, either the negative thoughts remain unnoticed or one covers them up by ideas, explanations. One is worried, tense not because negative thoughts are there but because one wants to push away these thoughts. You are open to wonder now. You are on the Original ground.
There is no one thinking. (when you say-‘I am thinking’, this itself is thinking and not the source of thinking) If one sees this, the idea of controlling, moulding the thinking process drops. The Original ground takes over.
Y V Chawla