How we Evolved to Feel- An Evolutionary Biology Theory 

How Anthropology and Darwinism Shape Human Behavior: Why We Do What We Do

Why do we feel guilty when we hurt others, get embarrassed when we make a mistake, or feel pleasure when we're praised? Believe it or not, these feelings and behaviors have deep roots in our evolutionary past. Anthropology, the study of human societies and cultures, helps us understand how our thoughts, actions, and habits may have been shaped by Darwinism—the theory of evolution by natural selection. Here’s a closer look at how evolutionary survival strategies continue to influence our behavior today.

The Evolutionary Advantage of Emotions and Social Bonds

Humans have been around for hundreds of thousands of years, but modern society—large cities, anonymous crowds, social media—is a recent development. For most of our existence, we lived in small, tightly-knit groups where cooperation and social harmony were essential for survival. When we talk about “survival of the fittest,” it’s not just about strength; it’s about being able to work well within a group. Evolutionary theory tells us that behaviors that help us fit in or cooperate with others were selected over time because they helped us survive.

Example 1: Guilt – Keeping the Group Together

Ever done something wrong and felt a knot in your stomach, a sense of guilt that doesn’t go away until you apologize or make it right? Guilt is a powerful feeling, and its roots go back to our need to stay connected with others.

Why It’s Useful: For our ancestors, getting along with the group was essential. If you stole food, didn’t share, or harmed another group member, you risked damaging relationships and maybe even being kicked out. Back then, being alone meant being exposed to predators and losing access to the resources the group shared. Guilt evolved as a way to prompt us to “make things right,” a survival tactic that kept us in good standing with our group (Nesse, 2001).

Why It Persists Today: Even in today’s world, we’re hardwired to avoid being outcasts. This explains why we might feel guilty over small things, like forgetting a friend’s birthday or missing a family event. Though we no longer depend on small, tight-knit groups for physical survival, the feeling of guilt still works to keep us bonded to those we care about, even if the stakes aren’t as high.

Example 2: Empathy – The Building Block of Human Society

Empathy, the ability to feel and understand what others are going through, is another powerful emotion with evolutionary roots. When we see someone in pain, we often feel uncomfortable, and many of us are driven to help them. But why should we care so deeply about the suffering of others?

Why It’s Useful: In a small tribe, cooperation was key. Helping others increased the likelihood that they would help us in return—a concept known as “reciprocal altruism.” By feeling empathy, we’re more likely to support others, which strengthens bonds within the group and ensures that everyone has a better chance of surviving (Trivers, 1971).

Why It Persists Today: We still experience strong empathy, even toward strangers or people in other parts of the world. This is why we might donate to charities or volunteer to help people we’ve never met. While modern life doesn’t require us to be as directly cooperative for survival, our instinctive empathy persists because it’s deeply embedded in our brains.

Social Hierarchies and Status

In any group, some people naturally take on leadership roles while others follow. Our inclination to organize into hierarchies and strive for status is also rooted in our evolutionary history. In early human groups, higher status often meant better access to resources, mates, and protection, which were essential for survival.

Example 3: Shame and Embarrassment – Protecting Our Reputation

Imagine tripping in public or getting caught in a lie. The feeling of shame or embarrassment can be overwhelming. But why do we care so much about what others think of us?

Why It’s Useful: In a small community, reputation was everything. If you were seen as unreliable, untrustworthy, or incompetent, others might avoid you or exclude you from group activities. Embarrassment and shame evolved as “warning signals,” letting us know when we’ve made a mistake or done something that could harm our reputation. These feelings prompt us to correct our behavior, preserving our status and relationships within the group (Gilbert, 2000).

Why It Persists Today: We still experience shame and embarrassment over things like failing in school, making mistakes at work, or even saying something awkward at a party. In modern society, we might not be directly threatened by losing status, but social rejection is still psychologically painful. This is why embarrassment can feel so intense, even when the stakes aren’t as high as they once were.

How Evolutionary Behaviors Persist (and Sometimes Backfire) in Modern Life

In the modern world, we don’t face the same survival threats that our ancestors did. We don’t need to worry about lions or finding food each day. However, our brain still operates with the same evolutionary wiring that helped our ancestors survive.

Example 4: Stress and Anxiety – Outdated Survival Mechanisms?

Imagine you’re worried about an upcoming test or presentation, and you feel stressed or anxious. While these feelings seem unhelpful in our modern lives, they evolved as mechanisms to prepare us for danger.

Why It Was Useful: Stress and anxiety evolved to help us react to immediate threats. If a predator was nearby, feeling anxious would prepare our body for “fight or flight” by increasing our alertness, speeding up our heart rate, and getting our muscles ready for action. This was great in situations where danger was immediate and required quick action.

Why It Persists and Sometimes Causes Problems Today: In the modern world, stress and anxiety often don’t relate to immediate physical danger. Instead, they’re triggered by things like deadlines, social interactions, or financial concerns. Our “fight or flight” response isn’t as useful in these situations, but because it’s deeply rooted in our evolutionary history, we still experience it. This can lead to chronic stress or anxiety, which isn’t helpful and can even be harmful to our health (Sapolsky, 2004).

Are These Behaviors Worse Today?

Some anthropologists and psychologists argue that certain evolutionary behaviors may even be more pronounced in today’s complex society. Here’s why:

1. Constant Social Comparison: Social media amplifies our instinct to compare ourselves to others and seek approval, a behavior rooted in our desire for social status. In our ancestors’ small groups, there were limits to how much we compared ourselves to others, but now we’re exposed to a vast range of people, which can intensify feelings of inadequacy or shame.

2. Group Conflicts and Social Divides: Our evolutionary tendency to form “in-groups” and “out-groups” (think “us vs. them”) helped small groups stay cohesive, but in today’s interconnected world, it often leads to division and conflict. This is why people can be intensely loyal to certain groups (like sports teams, political affiliations, or cultural identities), sometimes leading to misunderstandings or hostility toward those who are “different.”

3. Persistent Need for Connection: While we live in a world full of people, many of us still feel lonely. Evolution has wired us to be social creatures, and feeling isolated is stressful because, historically, it was dangerous. Even though we’re more connected digitally, we still crave close, personal relationships, which online interaction doesn’t always provide.

Final Thoughts: Using Evolutionary Insight to Understand Ourselves

Understanding the evolutionary roots of our behaviors can help us be more compassionate toward ourselves and others. Realizing that guilt, shame, anxiety, and the desire for approval are natural responses can make it easier to manage them in a healthy way. While these behaviors may have helped us survive in small groups thousands of years ago, they sometimes make modern life more complicated. With this awareness, we can work on channeling these instincts productively, building supportive communities, managing stress, and creating healthier relationships.

By studying our evolutionary past, we gain insight into the “why” behind our behaviors—and with this knowledge, we can shape a more understanding, connected future.

Sources:

• Nesse, R. M. (2001). "The Evolution of Guilt: Implications for Motivational Systems." Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.

• Trivers, R. (1971). "The Evolution of Reciprocal Altruism." The Quarterly Review of Biology.

• Gilbert, P. (2000). "The Relationship of Shame, Social Anxiety and Depression: The Role of the Evaluation of Social Rank." Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy.

• Sapolsky, R. M. (2004). Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers.