Call Me By Your Name

By Sophia Doshi

I watched this film alongside two of my closest friends during a sleepover. One of my friends had already seen it, and the remaining two of us were skeptical that the movie would be any good. I've learned that whenever I set my expectations low, the film/book/show in question flips those expectations on their head—it's often astounding how good they turn out. Of course, since life isn't always predictable, this doesn't always happen. Yet when it does, it's like seeing something beautiful come from what you thought was nothing.

I later write in my journal about it, because I came away with some beautiful quotations from this movie. My friends did, too. One of them loved the quote "Is it better to speak or die?" Another loved the classic quote "Call me by your name, and I'll call you by mine." I personally loved Elio's father's speech:
"How you live your life is your business, just remember, our hearts and our bodies are given to us only once. And before you know it, your heart is worn out, and, as for your body, there comes a point when no one looks at it, much less wants to come near it. Right now, there's sorrow, pain. Don't kill it and with it the joy you've felt."
We all have one body and one heart in our lives, and we're made to use them. We should use them while we can. 

I also saw a connection between this film and the horrific, neglected theme of romanticized pedophilia in paper & digital content between minors and adults. Elio and Oliver's relationship has been seen in media like Lolita and My Dark Vanessa, both sickening. While this was downplayed and overlooked in the film (which took place in 1983, 4 years before the AIDs crisis that started in 1987), it is still a relevant topic that should have been considered by directors and authors before it is mass-produced for audiences everywhere. Regardless of age, gender, or sexuality, audiences should never feel like a pedophilic relationship is normal. 

Before being a film, Call Me By Your Name was a book by André Aciman. My friend at the sleepover who has already seen the movie read the book and loved it. I didn't have the heart to bring up the themes riddled with red flags within the movie, let alone in the book; we were all just happy to be there together, and besides, it was too late at night for me to form coherent sentences in a way that would convey the gravity and sensitivity of the subject. I also think that I was the only person analyzing the (illegal) age gap between Elio and Oliver. At face value, it is two grown men who are living a romantic life in Northern Italy and happened to fall in love. Yet when taking a closer look, it is a more sinister picture of manipulation, perversion, and grooming. This truth was undermined by the insightful quotes and stunning aesthetic of the film's setting. 

I am going to (perhaps without any expertise in the area) make an assumption about the way the author and director wanted the movie to turn out. I assume that there wasn't any intention to purposefully romanticize pedophilia. It was probably an attempt to make a 1980s-based rom-com in the idyllic little towns of Italy. I read that at its premiere at the Sundance Film Festival, the film received a standing ovation. When it screened at Alice Tully Hall as part of the New York Film Festival, it received a ten-minute ovation, which was recorded as the longest in the festival's history. 

I thought the film was aesthetically beautiful, and the message sent about living and loving freely was well-sent and much-needed. In the end, the only problem I had was with the overlooking done by the directors in regard to the original story's perversion and romanticization of pedophilia. Overall, it was a solid 9/10 without considering its negative elements, and a 3/10 with their consideration. 

Cover image from IMDb