Marriage and Fertility

Betrothal - Wedding Ceremonies - Wedding Celebrations

Divorce- Fertility and Family 

Betrothal

Arranged Marriages

There is a large difference in marriage traditions for the average civilian and the nobility of Arascon. Most of the time, those of noble families do not wed out of love, but rather out of obligation. However, there are those who are not nobles who also submit to arranged marriages. Arranged marriages are usually overseen by the family elder or the current 'head' of the family. It is near impossible to rebuke these arrangements. Once a family head or elder has arranged a marriage, both people involved must decline the marriage on the grounds that they are incompatible. This declination must be approved by the Crown, the Head of the Balanced Scales, or by one of the three Holy Sisters.

Otherwise, the betrothal is signed into contract not by the people involved in the actual marriage, but by the people bartering the deal. Often the deal involves trade, money or other ties that will help both noble families. Because the arrangements are made by the elders of the family or the family head, it is extremely difficult to get the Balanced Scales or the Crown to approve the dissolve of the contract and thus the betrothal. Since the Holy Sisters are hard to gain an audience with, their approval is also difficult to gain.

In the time between the signing of the contract and the actual wedding, those promised to each other are free to meet and learn about each other so they can check their compatibility. Since it is common to take lovers in Arascon, most nobles don't even try to get their betrothal dissolved.

Marriages of Love

When a couple agrees to marry outside of formal arrangement, it is tradition for the one asking to hand the other a rare blue-stemmed rrea Flower. Because the crea flower generally has a white stem, the blue stemmed crea is hard to find despite the abundance of crea throughout Arascon. Either the man or woman can be the recipient of the flower.

The person has twelve days to accept the marriage proposal. To accept, they give a loaf of bread called a Promise Bun. The Promise Bun is usually homemade, but can be purchased. It is made from peppel flour and stuffed with crea petals, fruits and honey. The bread is then split between the two as a symbol of their promise.

To gain official sanction for their marriage, the pair must gain the approval of the groom's family elder and the bride's twelve year friend. This is because the groom's family must approve of a wife who can bare children for their family name and the bride's friend must make sure that the pair are compatible. The Family Elder grants approval by giving a ring to the bride. The Twelve year friend grants approval by giving a white sash to the groom.

Over time, the ring and sash have gotten to be extravagant. Some give family heirlooms as the sash and ring, others give fine masterwork pieces. Some sashes have been seen that contain patterns throughout simply by the way the thread is wound. Others have colorful borders.

Marriages of love are rare among nobles, but fairly common among the common folk.

Wedding Ceremonies

The meat of the marriage ceremony includes a signing of a contract that is overseen by the family elders (and family heads if they differ), a delegate from the Order of the Balanced Scales and the twelve year naming friends of the pair getting married. The contract is an oath made to the Gods that the two are bound for life so that they may continue the family line. Often the wording of the contract is repeated aloud by the bride, groom, and their twelve year naming friends. If the twelve year naming friends are not able to participate, a family elder may step into their place.

It is tradition for the bride to cut her hair short for the wedding, giving the length of her hair to the groom as a gift and symbol of her commitment to him. In exchange, the groom presents the bride with small dagger to symbolize that he will protect her.

After the Bride and Groom present their gifts to each other, their hands are bound together by a single red thread. After this, the Blessings of the Gods are spoken by at least one priest over them. The red thread must stay connect and unbroken during this time. The Priest clasps his hands over the bound hands, to they cannot pull apart to undo the marriage themselves. If the thread falls off, their marriage is not sanctioned by the Gods. It is excruciatingly rare that this should happen because, for the most part, the Gods don't trifle in the affairs of mortals on such a petty level.

It is common that a variety of priests attend, one to represent each of the Gods. However, one is enough to over see the blessings of the Gods upon the couple to be wed. After the contract is signed, the priest blesses the couple, wishing many children on them, a long, happy life and safety and peace onto the family as a whole.

A wedding ceremony is generally a small and private affair when it has been arranged. Wedding arrangements are made by the groom's mother.

Wedding Celebrations

After the small, private wedding ceremony, there is usually a large celebration where many people are invited. The celebrations vary based on who is getting married and what the families are like. Some parties are large with music, dancing, and delicious foods. Others are more reserved with a meal and perhaps actors.

Nobles usually have large celebrations in the towns where they live to celebrate weddings in their families. They invite the common folk and present to them the bride and groom. They give bread and flowers to everyone to celebrate life and beauty.

Small tokens are usually given to the Bride and Groom. Usually the gifts include round pebbles from the rivers and lakes nearby. This is to symbolize a smooth and prosperous marriage. Some people give money to the Bride and Groom to wish them wealth in their life together. Others give clothing, breads, flowers or other small objects that represent the wish they have for them in their life together.

Usually, richer family try to give more extravagant gifts and throw more elaborate parties. Nobles make a big production of the party, often holding a festival for their city at the same time.

Divorce

Marriage is commonly used as a bartering tool within the country. Both men and women are married into families to help secure trade or other favorable returns. In the country of Arascon, there is no concept of divorce. Marriage is an oath made to the Gods and thus, cannot be broken. While there may be no concept of divorce, it is common for married couples to have lovers on the side. In fact, it is considered acceptable for both parties to take a lover should their marriage fail to produce a child.

Fertility and Family

The concept of lineage and the family name is quite important in Arascon. To many, nothing is more important than the continuation of the family name. If a family should have all daughters, it is common practice to have men marry into that family to continue that family’s name on. The concept of family name is very important and most people in Arascon consider it a curse should their family name end with them. They believe that if their family name should end with them, then they have displeased the Gods and will not be reborn into the world.

Infertile women are considered to be cursed from their previous life. These women, while not shunned in society, are often not accepted either. People around them do not give them an easy life because it is believed that they must make amends for the misdeeds of their previous life through struggle. This does not apply to women who are struck infertile through accident or mishap. It is taboo to interact with any woman who has become infertile through an accident. People believe that these women have displeased the Gods in their current life to such an extent that they must pay for their action not only in this life, but also in the next. These women are shunned. Of course, if a woman’s fertility is taken from her through violence, the person who does so is put to death. This is considered to be one of the most heinous crimes that a person can commit; some even consider it worse than murder.

Many women have children out of wedlock and those children take their mother's name. In Arascon, having a child out of wedlock is considered as favorable as having a child while married. There is no concept of 'bastard' children.