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Don’t marry him!
I found myself getting hit in the head with his fist.
Verbal altercations.
Threats of violence.
Anger and bitterness.
I was so angry…
I am the middle child of my siblings. I grew up in Chicago, IL. I had a pretty decent childhood growing up. My mom, who is no longer with me, took me to church at a very early age, which I am so grateful for. I got saved at the age of sixteen. My mom divorced my dad when I was two years old. Even though my dad wasn't present in the home, I still managed to have a close relationship with him. My family says I was my dad's favorite. I often think back to when my dad left our home. It was then that a door of rejection, fear, and the need to be approved by man, was opened in my life.
Years later, I met a man who appeared to be the perfect gentleman. I dated him for a short time, then he asked me to marry him. I remember asking him if he thought we should go to marriage counseling first, and he told me we didn't need to go. He felt like his pastor, who was his uncle, was all the counseling we needed. I remember going to God about the marriage. The response was, “Don't marry him!” God is always right, but I disobeyed. I went through much pain as result of my own disobedience. I became pregnant with a son. During my pregnancy, I had to block blows to my belly, and I found myself getting hit in the head with his fist. Because of my fear to tell anyone, I stayed in the marriage, thinking he would change. It only got worse.
I was later told by neighbors that when I would leave for work, there was another woman who would come to our home. I confronted my ex-husband, thinking he might come clean and tell the truth about the other woman, but he didn't. I found out the truth through broken car windows, which then resulted in verbal altercations and threats of violence. I was so angry at what was happening, I began committing adultery. I could remember calling out to God to help me get out of the mess I had created. It didn’t happen overnight, but gradually my life began to change. One of the noticeable changes I had was being set free from the resentment that I had towards my ex-spouse. I could actually see him without wailing up with anger and bitterness. I was also set free from the need to be accepted by others. I love people, but the unhealthy approval of man went away. I noticed as I would spend more time in my bible, I began to change my thinking about myself. I found myself wanting to hang around other people who also wanted a deeper relationship with Christ.
Not long after, I joined a ministry that is still helping me in my growth process. It may be that you're in a similar situation to the one I found myself in. Maybe you know someone who is currently in an abusive situation. By all means, if it's physical and there could be potential harm done, get some help from your pastor or someone you can confide in. God will never have you feeling condemned about anything you go through in life. You can trust Him with your life. He is the one person who you can count on who will never leave nor forsake you. He accepts all your short comings, and He wants to express His everlasting love toward you. Will you allow Him into your life today? You have nothing to lose but Jesus Christ to Gain!
Real Life Stories Christian Testimony Books
Jim and Carla Barbarossa
Phone: 219-762-7589
Email: jimbarbarossa7@gmail.com or jim@step-by-step.org
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