Character Introductions:
Crazus Runebeoner is introduced, as well as the Edgewalker "farmworld" (a totalitarian utopia run by Illithids) where he's raised. In their language, his name translates to "The Broken One," one of the few Illithid words he (illegally) learned. Shortly after choosing the Puzzle Box Judgement Type gear, he notices a stranger who waves him over and reveals the truth of his world and his people: basically brainwashed automatons who act as slaves for the Illithids who are then harvested and devoured (their brains) when their usefulness is over. Or when they shrug off the brainwashing. Or on a whim.
Having shrugged off the first steps of the brainwashing, Crazus then asks his benefactor how to escape.
El Cabron pushes him out of a doorway and directly into freefall, crossing dimensions as he pierces the stratosphere and into Neo Florida proper.
Crazus survives by transforming the Puzzle Box into a pair of massive panties that check his fall. Surviving the dice rolls, he lands in clear swamp water and is picked up by El Cabron, narrowly escaping the Magewinds who is hot on their tail, raining sticks of dynamite for some reason.
-----------------------
Arielle awakens to her assigned shota, the magic-user Barnaby Baxter, who tells her that she's gotta go do something today. After failing her memory checks (as does Barnaby) she at least remembers that she has to meet a visiting dignitary today. She heads out to accost a couple of servants in order to figure out where The Warden is. One servant is the usual awe-struck Drow-worshipping human.
The other, on the other hand, flat-out disrespects her.
She attempts to attack him three times, and three times he repels her before disappearing, including an attempt to hogtie and throw the other servant at him. The hogtied servant blurts out "The Matron" before orgasming all over himself and passing out.
She eventually makes her way to the central throne room, where she come across her Matron, the Queen of the Belvederes. Morganna Belvedere bids her close, and Arielle notices that the servant who escaped her wrath earlier is the newest Prince Consort to the Queen.
The Queen publicly declares that she's the head representative (out of a small party) chosen to represent No Zone 13's interests with the Bug Catcher's Guild, and a round of applause is given.
She is then tied up to a Saint Andrew's Cross and given lashings as her crimes for the day are publicly declared.
Shivering but wanting more, Arielle notices that her PB shows not one but two dots: one where The Warden awaits her and her party, and a second mysterious one with no details near the sewers.
(A brown dot near the sewers lol).
Following her gut instinct, Arielle heads to that point where she meets El Cabron, who reveals that The Warden is actually a trap. She can choose to come with him or try the Warden after all, even though he's going to enslave and sell the Royal Ravishers who went with him.
She goes with him.
As he poles the gondola away from the central area towards a larger ship in the swamps, he asks her if she'd like to pursue The Warden and possibly free the Ravishers there, which she decides not to.
"After all, if they're weak enough to get captured, then they deserve it."
With that they take off to Nopetown with little to no resistance.
-----------------------
[Squirrel's Character] is introduced, his backstory established as he starts off on the return trip of a caravan from the Edgelands: the closest point where the merchant caravans meet up with the outside through the Magewinds wall that separates Neo-Florida from the rest of the world.
His relationship with The Bully and The Blacksmith are established, and he learns Dicksmithing from The Blacksmith (who is actually a Hyper Hick in secret). He also defeats a Blowjob Banshee and survives the slaying attempt beautifully (my rolls sucked so badly >XD ).
Because some idiot is dynamiting the swamp, the Magewinds are coming at the caravan from one side and the Gravity Howitzer is attacking from the rear. The Bully and [Squirrel's Character] splits the party in half, with Squirrel's half heading south.
He's also caught the attention of both the Magewinds and the Howitzer, the former pointedly chasing him down. Stopping for a second, one of the most fattest, annoying, and self-centered merchants approach Squirrel regarding getting the caravan out of there.
Both plot to leave one another should they need to.
Taking off with his flight capability, [Squirrel's Character] triggers the Magewinds ability to teleport ahead using the cloudcover, coming down as a column of itself. Squirrel dodges it, but the result is now a massive spot of Black in the swamps, where the caravan is heading off to.
Squirrel's Character does something and now shadow creatures have erupted out of the Black spot, threatening both himself and the caravan. Leaving the caravan to it's fate (the resultant crash also destroying the shadowy beasts), his character rises a bit too high and the Cloudcover strikes him down. He survives the attack, but his wings are fried for now.
Walking calmly away from the crash, [Squirrel's Character] narrowly avoids the resultant splash of Black.
Taking off to the East, he is picked up by the Bully's half of the caravan which now has a chortling El Cabron, who had been watching the whole time. Giving him a ride to Nopetown, they encounter no other problems.
-----------------------
[Gary's Character] rises from the swamp, bound in chains, before he's booted forward. Having been raised by the Maneater tribe, he was essentially sold into slavery when he annoyed them too much with his talk about wanting to be a Pimp yet never going to the Big City to do so.
Bound and chained to four others (an Orc, a Hick, a hooded guy and a fat, chuckling blonde guy), [Gary's Character] finds himself in a cross-swamp Trek, crossing leagues by foot to get to Nopetown where the slavers plan on selling them all, the finest specimens they could find in this caravan.
Pissing off Halvor, the slavers leader, [Gary's Character] catches a beatdown from him and the sympathies of the sole drow female amongst the slavers, all five of them (four humans and one drow female) on Artaxes while the slaves slogged through the muck.
Eventually they come to a break and the slaves are chained to a large tree. [Gary's Character] pisses off Halvor further, who damn near attempts to kill him (LITERALLY I GOT A CHANCE TO ROLL A FINISHING MOVE LOL).
The robed and hooded slave offers to help, and gets one of the manacles loose. Working on the other, someone squeals and [Gary's Character] finds himself under assault from Halvor. Using the Hick as a shield, only for the HIck to turn on him as well, [Gary's Character] causes a semi-riotous melee to occur. The robed and hooded guy gets away, and eventually [Gary's Character] finally passes out only to wake up chained to the tree alone, the slavers facing him down with crossbows drawn.
Halvor declares that he's to die right then and there, but he talks his way into drawing the drow closer. At that point he then makes the insightful roll to attempt to bring her in as a Ho.
He wins the roll, and she turns on the slavers.
As he attempts to gnaw his way through the manacles, the Orc slave rushes him, as does Halvor, but they screw up and only aid him in his escape attempt. Laughing, the fat slave decides to finally join in, aiding him and the drow.
During the ensuing melee, the trio escape on Artaxes, and along the way they pick up the robed and hooded guy who had been waiting in the bushes nearby, revealed to be The Pirate.
The fat slave takes off his mask to reveal the very same face, only this time brunette. El Cabron guides them towards Nopetown, pointing out how the Orc was a secret slaver and they were going to be killed once they got to Nopetown anyway. This was part of a sting (slavery is secretly illegal in Nopetown, punishable by whatever the Bug Catchers deem necessary at the time), and the Pirate had long since noted [Gary's Character]'s strange proclivities anyway.
Without problem, they headed their way to Nopetown.
-----------------------------------
Deep in the swamps, Dude Geo, professional half-orc and one of the foremost researchers on the Black, threw dynamite into Black-infested waters.
On a gondola, equipped with proper PPE's and given three aides (talkative Larry, taciturn but solid Barry, and mumble-mouthed, fat and squat Jackass), the Dude had been sent by El Cabron himself in order to perform "necessary research."
How throwing dynamite into the Black is necessary, he wouldn't explain, just ordering him cryptically to head out there. He does figure out that the sample he takes continues the motions as if still dynamited, though.
Larry and Barry talk (well, Larry talks - Barry grunts and answers in single words) with the Dude about it all when the Magewinds kick up, suddenly raining dynamite as it gives chase.
During the ensuing chase, sending Black fuming all over, Larry and Barry accidentally fall as the Dude collects Jackass and attempts to use his Geo-power, only to discover that there's too much static for him to feel it.
Using his waterspeed, the Magewinds at first gives chase only to turn at the last second, finding a new series of targets to troll.
Now, though, he has the Flesh Golem Titan "L'Barry" (not as cool as Blarry, but the way I originally designed it dammit!) to deal with, a massive creature composed of the previously lost Larry and Barry. Casting magic spells, the Dude accidentally causes a reaction within the Black-infested waters, causing huge columns/waterspouts to occur.
With columns of the Black blasting all around and the Titan barreling down upon him, the gondola mostly destroyed, the Dude does the one thing no one ever does normally: he decides to tunnel through the Black in order to get into the swamp mud underneath.
Feeling that it's changed him somehow (HE BARELY FUCKING SURVIVED THE DICE ROLLS, AHAHAHHAHAHA) he gets only a moment of rest before L'Barry tunnels in after him. The new, underground chase goes down with L'Barry firing spouts of Black at him, only for the Dude to discover that the Black can be frozen if provided with a high-enough powered ice spell.
Escape L'Barry, leaving him behind, he tunnels back up through into clean swamp water only for it to be revealed that Jackass was El Cabron the whole time, "the real one."
Helping him take off his helmet, El Cabron screams and the Dude finds out that the Black has shifted him from a half-orc (mostly orcish features) to a half-orc (mostly human features), including getting rid of his extraordinarily nasty feet.
Even worse, his cute little super poison druggy dart frog familiar has become a freakin' humanoid Stand!
He chases El Cabron all the way back to Nopetown, encountering no other bad situations. Cornering him in his Presidential-style office, El Cabron calls in his Wet Girls (who do nothing but prance around cutely) and then Jaime, his personal secretary.
Jaime is told to stand down as the Dude honestly considers smiting him, and the two hash it out. El Cabron admits that he wanted The Dude kept outta the way since The Warden is looking to start a coup by wiping out his allies and friends.
"Possibly, maybe, I don't know, but it's what he does 'cuz he's a jackass!"
The Dude finagles a series of bonuses for surviving the situation, including being brought into the official research team and doubled funding. El Cabron capitulates, something Melvin verifies.
NOTE: Melvin Strata showed up in Squirrel's and Dude Geo's introductions.