AOTW43 'Making Questionable Decisions since 1982”

Memories from the weekend.

There was supposed to be nine, but then it was eight.  A last minute colon blockage rendered Daryl (in his words) “full of shit” and unable to attend.  And so this year’s attendees were as  follows:  Cookie (Chair), Leo, Freud, Beaups, Mowbs, Cruiser, Gary, and your scribe (Harper)

This year saw us gather in the Kawartha Lakes area at a newly renovated retreat on Canal Lake, just West of Kirkfield. Our digs boasted a robust capability for 16 guests. Crucially, it had a great outdoor sitting area for  three part time smokers (and one remaining toker)

Proof of Steve’s professional savviness was on full display throughout the weekend. Upon arrival the AOTW43 hats were nicely arrayed on the dining table. Attention to details like Starbucks coffee, quality snacks and a box of Kleenex by every bed.  Also a first for AOTW, was “Our Menu”, a professionally conceived and executed meal plan.

The first “activation” (a key principle of event planning) was getting Beaups  barbequing an early dinner of Ballyard Franks on a Sweet bun.  There was a small niggle (the sausages were frozen),  which triggered a vintage Beaups’  outburst (“What the fuuuuck?!”), but this passed quickly, and our first feeding was a success.

As has been the case for the past few years, health was a top-of-mind point of discussion, The pain of aging was highlighted through a few stories, insights, and helpful suggestions.  For example, on the indignity of the prostate check: it’s easier to receive the finger up the ass if lying on one’s side, whereas the police arrest pose (hands out in front and bent over) felt more like sexual assault; jerk off regularly to maintain a strong, “fire hose” like piss; girls with Parkinson’s give better hand jobs; having a handicap Flag on golf cart is more likely to get you a gimee; the downside of chemotherapy is your taste buds  are shot, and that’s why you can’t taste cock.  And finally, as one wise asshole reminded us, “The fence is always greener on the other side.”

All that quality conversation seemed to tucker out the majority, and “night night” came early, with Cruiser and Leo the last men standing at 1:30am.

Saturday morning homemade Egg McMuffins and fresh coffee set everyone up for the day, with the first cleansing ale being observed at 10:30AM.  A very laid back morning bled into midday with not much activity desired or sought out, aside from a leisurely walk by some, while the rest remained behind to rest up for lunch-time pizza.

Attention eventually turned to the keynote activation of the weekend: 43 trivia questions centered around a careful curation of milestones over the past (you guessed it) 43 years.  Each correct answer earned you points, with the winner getting to choose what part of the dinner they wished to prepare. Scott Cruise was the winner.  And let the record show that, in a first for AOTW, AI was employed in the planning of this main event.

Following that, some hairless camel toe found its way to the TV screen, an AOTW pastime which had been absent for a few years.  While mesmerizing to some, it was less of a draw for others, the explanation being, “I don’t want to see a bigger dick than mine.”  But on the whole, the consensus seemed to be that a certain amount of porn is acceptable – if not required -  at this age and, as noted above, good for your health. 

Saturday night dinner was a VERY well received plate of Striploin, Caesar potatoes, and over-baked broccoli, accompanied by a higher grade of red wine (another good detail). Scott Cruise, the trivia game winner chose to prepare the broccoli dish. Leo coming in second place chose the easiest part of the meal to prepare, which was basically cutting the cake – appropriate as it was his birthday that day.

After a team effort at clean-up, we waddled down the lengthy yard, where several men had prepped for the bonfire.  The rest of the night was a rather tame affair: mature conversation, sensible volume on the music,  no loud outbursts of manoshere nonsense.  And again, a fairly early night.  Might it have been the siren call of that Kleenex box awaiting us by our bedsides?      

With a Sunday morning 9:10AM golf tee-off, we were up early to polish off another tasty breakfast sandwich and divvy up the excess booze and food.  Then it was off to Western Trent Golf Course, just a short, 10 minute drive away. There weren’t many on the course at that time, which meant nine holes of golf was completed in record time.  And the outcome:  Leo, Cruiser, Gary , and our Chair took the competition with one under par.  Shortly thereafter, the call for votes was made.  Unlike previous years, there did not seem to be much backroom vote negotiating, which may explain why the vote was a squeaker:  Freud 3; Gary 2; Cruiser 2; Leo 1.  As is often the case, there was some discussion of bylaw changes going forward to ease the Chairman’s workload.  Two motions were passed:  BYOB and BYOK (Bring your own Kleenex).  Thank you Steve for a job very well done.  And we look forward to what Floyd will tee up for AOTW44.