page- a boy employed by a knight to groom the knight's horse while the knight groomed the page
pain is just weakness leaving the body- what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. It builds character.
palmtop- computer that can be held in the palm. Smartphones are not palmtops because, in addition to making calculations, storing data, running programs, being programmable, and accessing the Internet, they can also make phone calls.
pandect- an outdated concept where you could go to one place and read all the laws
panhysterectomy- a surgical procedure in which all uteri are removed
pantry- a closet for keeping food, wines, bandages, Caprisun, gum, earplugs, paper plates, and plastic utensils
parchment- skin seen as the canvas for artworks in the medium of ink
parquet- the advanced stage in the game of only stepping on certain tiles
parody- singing your words to a tune somebody else wrote and calling it comedy
parsley- garnish restaurants put on dishes, people don't eat, and restaurants recollect to use in future dishes.
partake- to eat food that I set out, as if that's doing me a favor
participation- the 'miscellaneous' category in a gradebook
paste- semiliquid substance that, outside of toothpaste, comes up very little in my life.
patois- a form of speech that is distinct enough to not be a dialect of anything, but doesn't have an army and navy, and thus does not deserve the respect of the term language
PBJ- sandwich made of peanut butter, jelly (which is really just carbs and doesn't add much, nutritionwise, and is thus dispensable), and bread (dispensable, same as jelly)
pennant- a flaglike but not rectangular symbolic cloth used by sports teams and Ohio
peremptory- rashly authoritarian
perpetuate- to keep (a tradition) going for posterity. "perpetuating stereotypes"
person-first (adjective)- having the adjective after the noun in nominal form joined by 'with', such as 'a person with autism' (rather than 'an autistic' or 'an autistic person'), 'a person with bisexuality' (instead of 'a bisexual' or 'a bisexual person'), or 'the person with presidency' (instead of 'the president' or 'the presidential person')
a person is known by the company he keeps- may the friends I make (may the friends I make) speak for me (speak for me). May the friends I ma-ake (may the friends I ma-ake) speak fo-or me-ee (speak fo-or me-ee). When I come to the end of the roa-oad, and I lay down my he-a-vy loa-oa-oad, may the friends I make (may the friends I make) speak fo-or me (speak for me).
pet (verb)- to rub
philanthropist- a person who uses their great wealth to purchase virtuousness, which is contractually obligated to be mentioned titularly in any articles about scandals or atrocities.
philosophe- a rich white liberal who spends their time talking politics (i.e. complaining about the government) with their friends in a coffee shop
picture graph- a type of graph that I haven't seen since I learned about it in grade school, and I look at a lot of graphs these days.
piercing- a hole made in the flesh into which jewelry can be inserted
pillage- to burgle with bravado
pirouette- grown-up word for umbrella step
platitude- a statement that is not sufficiently dissenting
play devil's advocate- to defend an idea without implying that you find it defensible
player piano- a piano haunted by the ghost of a pianist, left to forever play whatever piece it was that led to his death.
pleasance- an inner, shaded part of a garden that gives a sense of privacy, while also being a perfect place for a hidden camera
plump- euphemism for fat that lost its euphemisticness in 1988. Try voluminous.
police- people who express dissent: "PC police", "fashion police"
polite- the checklist-based mockup of kind
political football- an issue
politicize- to consider in the context of the social and political systems and status at large
polygraph- a device used to detect how nervous someone is
pornography- a word I'd like to think is more detached than 'porn'. I hope my use of the term gives off the impression that I don't watch it. SLIGHTLY MORE INAPPROPRIATE JOKE.
post-truth (adjective)- of an environment in which people sometimes say things that aren't true, especially in regards to my political opponents
pound- a prison or shelter for the care of homeless or misbehaving dogs
prank (verb)- to inconvenience
pray- 1. to beg or hope earnestly or desperately 2. to sing some medieval Hebrew poetry that you've half-memorized out of a book along with all the other congregants. If you want to seek a true connection to God beyond mere recitation, the translation can be found on the opposite-facing page.
pregnancy- a sexually transmitted infection in which a parasite grows inside, and after about 3/4 of a year, emerges, causing extreme pain. It is recommended that one goes to the hospital to be attended to when the parasite emerges.
preppy- uptown, but in a suburb
prime (verb)- (psychology) to elicit
private defense agency- samurai
Procrustean- all-fits-one-size
productive- conducive to monetary gain
propaganda- the use of words, images, or other forms of communication to try to convince people of things
proverb- a quote whose author needn't be MLA-cited
provocative- edgy
pruno- fermented compost
psilosis- a medical disorder characterized by excessive smoothness of the skin
puberty- the developmental stage at which I lost my singing voice
pubic louse- technical term for rug bug
pundit- a television personality who entertains viewers by agreeing with them. (Are BreadTubers just the pundits of the left? No. They're not on TV)
putative- supposed, as a form of existence or categorization. i.e. putative father means supposed father as if that were a type of father