Opinion

Don't Ask Me Why I Use A Cane: Disability Rights

Leo Margil

Hi! My name is Leo Margil, I’m a sophomore at NHS, I use he/him pronouns, and my favorite element is neodymium because it’s super magnetic. You might have seen me around the school. I mean, I’m not that recognizable- I’m a short blonde white kid. You probably look over me, literally. But you have almost definitely glanced out of your classroom at the constant click, click, click that accompanies me when I walk. I don’t care that you look up at noise—most people are respectful and just go back to their work—but you definitely noticed my cane. It’s a red marbled foldable cane from CVS. I named it Elrod (long story, I was reading that part in The Martian where they have the council of Elrond to do the Rich Purnell maneuver and yeah, you can probably tell I’m a massive nerd by now, so.) I started using a cane about two months ago. I knew I would get weird looks and questions, but nothing could prepare me for the outright ableism and isolation I was faced with. The most persistent question I got was: Why are you using a cane? My answer: None of your business.

I didn’t say “none of your business” because I was trying to be rude, or because I’m embarrassed of using a cane. I said it because it gets so tiring answering that question multiple times a day to near strangers. Have you ever dyed your hair? You know when you go to school, and the first thing people say is “Wow! Did you dye your hair?”, and you don’t know how to respond, because obviously you dyed your hair, it didn’t turn green overnight. So you say “Yeah, I did,” and go to your next class. You walk in and everyone stares at you and the teacher asks “Wow! Did you dye your hair?” and you respond “Yeah, I did.” By the time you go to lunch, literally everyone you know (and even those you don’t) have asked if you dyed your hair, and you are considering wearing a shirt that says “Yes, I dyed my hair.” This is what I feel like every day. People are often asking why I use a cane out of concern, which is nice, but they don’t stop to consider that I’ve already told everyone why, and they are literally the thirtieth person to ask. I don’t mind telling people why I use a cane: I have knee pain and chronic fatigue syndrome. It’s not that exciting. I just mind when I am constantly, over and over again, asked. So, please, stop asking me why I use a cane.

Before I get into the article, a quick note about language. There have been multiple movements by abled people (people without disabilities) to use person-first or different language when regarding disability. There are many issues with this. With person-first language (ex. “person with a disability” instead of “disabled person”), the intention is to, well, put the person first, and not let their disability define them. However, our disability is part of us, and is a part of our definition of ourselves. Person-first language also tries to separate us from our disabilities and imply that we can’t be proud of or even accept them as part of ourselves. Most disabled people prefer to be called “disabled people”. Another common trend among well-meaning abled people is to use phrases such as “differently abled”, “disABLED”, “person with a different ability”, etc. This erases the very real fact of our disabilities. We are disabled. There’s no way around it. These phrases also imply that “disabled” is a dirty, bad word. It’s not; it’s simply a neutral descriptor word like tall or short. Being disabled isn’t a moral failure or a lack of effort. Also, old-fashioned terms such as ‘cripple’ are, in fact, very hurtful. Cripple and all of the related words (crip, crippled, etc) are ableist slurs. It’s not super hard to not call someone that. 

There are many different types of disabilities, including mental, physical, and sensory disabilities. “Disabled” has different definitions depending on the context (i.e. legal or medical). The legal definition of a disabled person under the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) is “a person who has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activity. This includes people who have a record of such an impairment, even if they do not currently have a disability. It also includes individuals who do not have a disability but are regarded as having a disability.” A mental disability is a mental condition (such as depression, PTSD, OCD, etc) or developmental disorder (such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia, etc) that impairs someone’s ability substantially. A physical disability is any physical condition (such as amputation, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, fibromyalgia, endometriosis, etc) that impairs someone’s ability in relation to their physicality. A sensory disability is any condition affecting perception of senses (such as visual impairment, being Deaf, audio processing disorder, etc). These aren’t mutually exclusive. Some conditions may originate in the brain but cause physical and sensory effects as well: Cerebral Palsy is abnormal brain development, but has effects on one’s physical abilities as well. I have ADHD, which is a mental condition, but it sometimes causes me to have trouble processing what I hear (audio processing) or makes me extra-sensitive to sensory input. Of course, I am not a doctor by any means, so if you’re interested in learning more, I would suggest asking a doctor or doing independent research.

Not all disabilities are visible. A visible disability is when you can tell someone is disabled—they use a mobility aid, sensory aid, they have on a shirt that says “I’M DISABLED!!”, etc. It is important to note that while you can tell sometimes, it’s always best not to assume anything further. I’m clearly disabled, but beyond that, there isn’t much you can assume. An invisible disability is one that is not obvious. These include mental disorders that may not be obvious, physical disabilities for which a person doesn’t use or need a visible mobility aid, and sensory disabilities that may not be obvious, like wearing contact lenses. It is very important to avoid assuming all people are able-bodied, as you may be silencing someone or making them uncomfortable and unlikely to ask for their needs to be met.


Disability Culture

Believe it or not, many disabled people take pride in their disabilities. There is a large community online and in real life of disabled people sharing their experiences, struggles, and accomplishments. Disability culture as a whole is broken up into many subcultures; for example, the Deaf community, one that I, as someone is not Deaf, cannot speak to. There is also a large community of neurodivergent people (people with ADHD, Autism, dyslexia/calculia/praxia, etc) who take pride in their neurodivergence and aren’t ashamed of it. There are many more subcultures out there, but all have one central message: we are not less because of our disabilities. We are whole human beings with fulfilling lives and independent thought, and we deserve to be treated as such. 


Spoon Theory

A common way of expressing our energy levels and needs is Spoon Theory, originally created by Christine Miserandino. Spoon Theory represents tasks as spoons, with certain tasks using more spoons than others. For example, getting dressed might ‘cost’ one spoon, making and eating breakfast might ‘cost’ three spoons, walking to school might ‘cost’ three spoons, and so on. People start their days with a limited number of spoons. Once the amount of spoons for that day is used up, we physically cannot do more tasks without leaving fewer spoons for the next day. Things that may seem small, like the earlier example of getting dressed, can be taxing activities for disabled people. However, Spoon Theory doesn't only apply to disabled people. Here’s an activity: write down the tasks you do each day and assign them spoons. Then, estimate how many spoons you may have each day. Do they add up? If not, you may want to devote more time to yourself and self-care. 


Tips for Interacting With Disabled People

I honestly wish I didn’t have to write this section, but abled people seem to lose all people skills when confronted with someone who’s disabled, so:

Do…

Thank you for reading this. I would like to point out that I am by no means an authority on disability. Someone might really hate being called disabled and may prefer the term differently abled. The information I provide in this article is about disabled communities as whole, not individual people (other than myself). I hope this article made you rethink how you perceive disability in yourself, others, and your community as whole. If you have any questions about this article or disability culture (not what’s wrong with me personally), feel free to email me at lemargil@students.natickps.org.

2022, Twee, and the Ever-Shortening Trend Cycle

Connor Federico-Grome

With the new year upon us, I see many people using the birth of 2022 as a period of transition. Whether it be in their style, their taste, their friendships, their decisions, it doesn’t matter. New year, new me! Right? Well, in the new year, one thing has already risen above all other nominal trends circling the drain of pop culture: Twee. 

Now when I first heard about this, it was thrown at me like a fastball leaving the knuckles of Cy Young, and it seems that many creators were equally ready for it. Up to bat, ready to swing like Babe Ruth. I was confused but very intrigued by Twee. The word itself almost demands to be looked at. It isn’t something that you can just pass over. I will also add that I think Twee is the most ridiculously amazing name for a style subculture. 

Upon further examination, I came to understand that Twee is a fashion and lifestyle aesthetic, derivative of the stylings of millennials in the early- to mid-2010s. Harper Finkle in Wizards of Waverly Place, Penelope Garcia in Criminal Minds, Rachel Berry in Glee—these are all applications of the Twee aesthetic into media and television. The style is categorized by its quirky nature: pencil skirts with leggings underneath, striped blouses, sweaters with a collar underneath, niche hair clips, etc. Think about your 3rd or 4th grade teacher, or the quiet TA you see in class but have never spoken to. Those are the ones who have Twee down to a T, without even knowing it. 

I’m all for this return of Twee, yet I think that if it is going to come back, it needs to be modernized. We can do the quirky sweaters and cardigans, the fun hair clips and such, but perhaps through the lens of Gen-Z fashion that we all know well. Trade the black leggings for a colored pair, throw on some leg warmers, favor a pair of combat boots over the ballet flats. This new wave of Twee is definitely one I will be watching from the sidelines, but I’m curious to see where it goes among those who are brave enough to commit to the styling. 

The first person to engage in this conversation with me IRL was a friend of mine. I always enjoy fashion talks with her because she has such a clinical view of fashion as a whole. For her, fashion is a machine,the moves of which we can predict. For me, fashion is just putting on clothes I think look cool. She raised the concern that the return of Twee is damaging the trend cycle. 

Now, for those who aren’t familiar, there is about a twenty-year period between when a style first pops up and when parts of it are regurgitated back into popular culture. A perfect example would be the return of y2K stylings, starting in summer 2020. The first time this style popped up was, like the name suggests, around the turn of the century. Twenty years went by, and it came back. However, it was not reproduced identically. Instead, those ideas of y2K were put in context with the “indie,” kid-core explosion that was going on at the same time. It’s important to note that the return of y2K was motivated by the internet. Never before was the trend cycle being referential of online media. 

Yet when we consider the return of Twee, which sprung up in a similar fashion to y2K (through the internet), we see that the window has shrunk significantly. The earliest sightings of Twee came about in the late 2000s/early 2010s, and we’re already bringing it back in 2022. It’s almost as if we collectively tried to use the twenty-year trend cycle with the return of y2K, and then abandoned that model with the return of Twee. The path we are headed down is one where the culture has become an amalgamation of lack of original thought, where people are more motivated by what others are doing instead of what they want to do. This is especially aided by social media, specifically TikTok. I wouldn’t have even known about Twee if it wasn’t for TikTok, and while I’m glad it introduced Twee to me, TikTok will only do more damage to the trend cycle.

But we are not the ones to blame. Unfortunately, young people now mostly get their inspiration from the internet, where nothing can be done to prevent the recycling of styles and trends at an increased rate. If only we could return to a society where culture wasn’t controlled by the internet. Or, perhaps we say goodbye to the trend cycle and accept a more collaged culture. Maybe it will bring to light some aspects of trends that went unrecognized. I believe that this is the route we're headed for in 2022. Now more than ever, people have access to unlimited points of reference. This will either allow for a beautiful synthesis of previous ideas, or the elimination of personal style in favor of topical interests and decisions motivated by those around you. 

We must be careful not to pick the latter.