Teaster Party

Teaster Party

“Carrots, do we really have to do this?”

“We’ve been planning it for months, dumb fox. Don’t you dare back out on me now!”

On a beautiful day at the tail-end of March, visitors to the happiest place on earth witnessed Judy Hopps with her arm hooked through her husband’s; it was a gesture of affection, but also one of coercion—one she used when trying to avoid the tried-and-true method of tugging on his tie. She didn’t want to mess with Nick’s neckpiece this time...not when they were on their way to a gathering especially for Easter.

Nick and Judy had just recently returned from their honeymoon in the Baahamas. All things considered, the fox should have been a little less fidgety, but he was still wary of facing this fluffle of friends. He’d met them all before, but...this was the first they’d hear of him and Judy getting hitched.

When WildeHopps arrived at the appointed meeting place (Wonderland HQ, as it was a tea party hosted by the March Hare and the White Rabbit) they immediately noted that everbunny was accounted for. All eyes fixed on Nick.

“Well, lookit who it is..that ol’ city fox!” came a lilting jibe.

“C’mon, Br’er! You know, my mama always says...”

“...if you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say nothin’ at all,” finished the first. “I hear ya, Thump. I reckon ya only say that about—I dunno-- five dozen times a day?!” He laughed. “I was only funnin’.”

As Nick and Judy reached the table, they parted ways to greet each guest in turn. When Nick came to Br’er, he grinned. “I like your style, pal.” He leaned in close to the leporine, as though divulging a secret. (He didn’t bother whispering; all rabbits have radar ears.) “I was thinking I may get back into hustling. You’d make a pretty good right-paw guy, if...” Nick paused, pretended to consider something. “What’s your opinion on elephants?” The rabbit was flabbergasted.

“Are you out of your gourd, fella?! I wouldn’t last a day out there! I was born in a briar patch!”

“Really?” Nick intoned, his voice completely even. “I never would have guessed.” His raised eyebrow said otherwise.

“Hey!” Thumper piped up again. “Remember, my mama always says...”

“I think,” intoned Rabbit, of the Hundred-Acre Wood, “that the both of you should simply apologize.” Despite their obvious chagrin, each complied.

“I’m sorry, Nick. I didn’t mean nothin’ by it.”

“Back atcha. I think we got off on the wrong paw.” He offered one of his for Br’er to shake. He did, and all was well.

“I knew ya had it in ya, Nick!” The sudden declaration from behind startled him, but not as much as the noisy, sloppy kiss on his cheek. Without missing a beat, he said,

“Hey, Rog. Good to see you.”

Judy, who at the moment stood beside Bean Bunny, had witnessed the whole thing. “Now we’re ready to party!” Her smile shone full-force, even as she stifled a laugh. Roger bounced back to his seat, beaming at the doe.

“Judy! Sit next to me? Plbbbwease?!” He looked at her with big, hopeful eyes. “I even saved you a seat!” She smiled back.

“Thanks Roger! I’d love to!” As she made her way there, the lone fox in the group face-pawed; he knew what was coming next.

“Oh, happy day! Don’t worry, Nick...I saved you a spot, too!” For the rest of the festivities, Roger, pleased as pie, sat with Judy on one side...and Nick on the other.

“Would you like another cup of tea?” asked the March Hare. Judy laughed.

“I don’t think you poured us any yet! We just sat down, so technically we can’t take ‘more’”

“You mean you can’t very well take less!” Nick dragged a paw through the fur between his ears. She fell for that routine...again?! Eh, she was probably just being polite.

Always eager for an audience, the March Hare lifted the teapot high above his head, the teacups in front of him. Positioning the spout between his ears, he poured tea into each cup, pausing periodically to close the gap between his ears, as though to stop the stream of steaming liquid. The White Rabbit had, presumably, seen him do this any number of times, and yet he appeared anxious anyway; he wasted not a minute snatching his treasured timepiece away from the Hare.

“You’re not ruining another watch on my watch!” he sniffed indignantly.

Nick wasn’t keen on the idea of another fluffle scuffle, so he deftly diverted everyone’s attention. “Since we’re all here,” he began casually, “ZPD’s most popular officers have a little news to share.”

“I hope it’s good news,” piped up a nervous-looking Bean.

“The best,” grinned Nick, who had decided to ditch his hustler act in favor of the happiness that thought brought him.

“That’s a relief,” breathed Bean, “I thought maybe Constantine got loose in Zootopia.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Nothin’. He’s just kinda slippery, that’s all.” He smiled at Nick, clearly pleased with his pun and looking for approval; Nick was happy to oblige.

“Impressive.” He paused. “Now, what was I saying?”

“Nick…!” The effect of Judy’s warning tone was negated by the accompanying giggles.

“Oh, right.” He turned to her. “Carrots, would you like to do the honors?” She didn’t need to be asked twice.

“Nick and I just got back from our honeymoon. We got married about a month ago.” Awestruck, Bean nearly fell out of his chair.

“Wow! That’s great, guys!” Nick kept his cool, but...Roger burst out laughing.

“Woah! Nick, your tail is tickling me!” Nick sighed; that served him right. He hadn’t wanted this bunch of bunnies to know that being with Judy made his tail wag. Oh, well.

“Sorry, Rog,” he muttered.

“Oh, that’s okay.” Without warning, he gave both bride and groom a celebratory kiss. “Mwah, Mwah. Mazeltov!”

“That’s really neat,” put in Thumper, blushing.

“Well, I’ll be!” boasted Br’er. “Our sweet ‘lil country girl done tamed a fox!”

“Why, that’s marvelous,” added Rabbit. Nick smirked.

“Thanks, long ears!” Rabbit momentarily bristled at the byname borrowed from another orange animal. “My pleasure. I’d be happy to throw you a party this spring, but of course that all depends if I can rid my garden of those awful termites. Last spring, they nearly destroyed my cabbage...”

Everyone seemed resigned to sit through yet another anecdote of agricultural aggravation... Everyone, that is, except the rabbit who sat at the far end of the table, the one reveler who had yet to say his piece. Then again, he seldom said anything at all.

As he tapped his teaspoon against his cup, Judy seemed pleased by the apparent request to kiss Nick. But that fox himself put up his paw to stop her; instead, he watched Oswald with interest. “Hold that thought, Carrots—though I do appreciate it.” He winked. “But, no—I think Mr. Lucky here wants to make a toast.” Hearing this, the rabbit nodded eagerly. “Called it! Well, it so happens that I’m an expert at reading paw signals, so go for it.” And so, Oswald gestured away, smiling all the while as Wilde translated.

“Congratulations, Judy and Nick. I wish you all the good fortune in the world—which is quite a bit more than I’ve had personally. But always remember that no matter our individual destinies, we rabbits—and all who call this place a second home—are have been gifted with an extraordinary opportunity to make the world a better place. We get to make people smile every day...and the only thing better than that is doing it with someone you love. Cheers, friends!”

Nick’s voice was cracking by the end of Oswald’s speech; he swiped at an eye with his tie, not daring to break out his pawkerchief in front of the fluffle. But he soon realized that no one would’ve cared...They, too, were tearing up. Some sniffled less surreptitiously than others: The White Rabbit, for instance, murmured, “Oh, my-my...” as a single tear ran down his cheek, while Roger sobbed loudly into his tea.

At length, somebunny spoke. “We love you guys,” blubbered Bean.

“We love you, too,” Judy assured everyone, moving to hug the Muppet. She kissed the top of his head, saying softly,

“Hey—you look so cute today!” At this, his sniffles subsided.

“You, too.”

Nick watched their exchange, wondering why the fox who once would have found it endlessly amusing was now lost for words. Maybe, he thought, it was because he’d learned that this was what holidays, or any days, were all about...they were meant to be spent with the mammals who matter to you. He took up his teacup, raising it high. “Happy Easter, everyone!”

As Carrots reached for her cup, her eyes met his. In that instant, he realized that Bean’s compliment hadn’t done Judy justice. She wasn’t just...that, she was beautiful.