Friendships
Finding Friends
Participate in Clubs (or talk to a teacher about starting one!)
Go to School Events, like house games!
Find common hobbies and interests with others
Join a School Sports Team
Connect with the Counselor
Friendship Struggles
Middle School is the time where you start to figure out who you are, what you stand for, and what you care about. That means opinions, interests, and priorities can change and may not always match those of the people around you.
It's normal to not get along with everyone. Not everyone is going to be your best friend or even your friend.
Pay attention to how you are treating others and how they are treating you. While you don't need to get along with everyone, you will need to show respect to everyone.
How to: Be a Good Friend
Have you ever taken time to think about the qualities of a good friend? Here's a quick guide on some of the basics:
1. Listen to understand
Take time to try to understand each other’s feelings, moods, and perspectives, not just when you are getting along but also when you disagree!
2. Respect privacy & keep gossip to a minimum
If you are not respectful of boundaries, share information that isn't yours to share, or talk badly about others, people might be uncomfortable trusting you.
If you are worried about someone or have concerns about something someone is doing, talk to a trusted adult (like the school counselor) who will help figure out how to help them or handle the situation
3. Practice kindness and empathy in your actions & words
Do you want people to be nice to you and understanding with you when you are having a hard time? So do other people!
4. Be an advocate for others if they are being treated unfairly or unkindly
If you see someone who isn't being treated well, do something about it!
5. Be dependable and communicate
If you say you're going to do something, keep your word. If for some reason you can't do it anymore or aren't comfortable with it, tell them so they know what's going on.
6. Remember that people change (including you!)
As we learn more and go through more things, the way we interact with the world changes too- like what we are interested in, what we like to do, and our priorities. It's okay to not like the same things or to spend time with other people- just be kind and respectful
Setting Boundaries
Just because someone is your friend, doesn't mean you have to like, agree with, or be okay with EVERYTHING they do. Being friends doesn't give them an unlimited pass to hurt feelings or make you feel uncomfortable.
It's important to have and express boundaries by letting others know what you are and are not okay with.
If someone does something you are not okay with, let them know.
If their reaction is unhelpful, that is your cue to get help.
