Ages 12-14
This is a time of many physical, mental, emotional, and social changes. Hormones change as puberty begins. Most boys grow facial and pubic hair and their voices deepen. Most girls grow pubic hair and breasts, and start their period. They might be worried about these changes and how they are looked at by others. This also will be a time when your teen might face peer pressure to use alcohol, tobacco products, and drugs, and to have sex. Other challenges can be eating disorders, depression, and family problems. At this age, teens make more of their own choices about friends, sports, studying, and school. They become more independent, with their own personality and interests, although parents are still very important.
Physical
They exhibit a wide range of sexual maturity and growth patterns between genders and within gender groups
They experience rapid changes in physical appearance
Changes in their appearance can occur at different rates, causing great concern
Social
They are interested in activities involving individuals of the opposite sex
They are looking more to peers than parents
They seek acceptance and trust
They tend to reject ready-made solutions from adults in favor of their own
They question authority and family values
Emotional
They compare themselves to others
They are concerned about physical development
They see themselves as always center stage
They are concerned about social graces, friends, being liked, etc.
They strive for independence, yet want and need adult approval
They seek privacy
Intellectual
They find justice and equality to be important issues
They are developing skills in the use of logic
They can solve problems that have more than one variable
They are ready for in-depth, long-term experiences
They want to explore the world beyond their own community
Positive Parenting Tips
Following are some things you, as a parent, can do to help your child during this time:
Be honest and direct with your teen when talking about sensitive subjects such as drugs, drinking, smoking, and sex.
Meet and get to know your teen’s friends.
Show an interest in your teen’s school life.
Help your teen make healthy choices while encouraging him to make his own decisions.
Respect your teen’s opinions and take into account her thoughts and feelings. It is important that she knows you are listening to her.
When there is a conflict, be clear about goals and expectations (like getting good grades, keeping things clean, and showing respect), but allow your teen input on how to reach those goals (like when and how to study or clean).
Healthy Bodies
Encourage your teen to be physically active. They might join a team sport or take up an individual sport. Helping with household tasks such as mowing the lawn, walking the dog, or washing the car also will keep your teen active.
Meal time is very important for families. Eating together helps teens make better choices about the foods they eat, promotes healthy weight, and gives your family members time to talk with each other.
Keep television sets out of your teen’s bedroom. Set limits for screen time, including cell phones, computers, video games, and other devices, and develop a family media plan.external icon
Make sure your child gets the recommended amount of sleep each night: For teenagers 13-18 years, 8–10 hours per 24 hours (including naps).