• No two kids are alike

No two children are alike, and no two children have exactly the same severity of special needs. Two children with autism can be so far apart on the autism spectrum that their plans may look nothing alike. Children all have different strengths, likes, dislikes, and triggers. 

• Provide tools, not toys.

When a child is exhibiting negative behaviors, it is very tempting to hand them a basket of toys and let them sit in the back of the room. This is why it’s important to coach your volunteers in how to use the materials in the room as tools instead of toys. The goal is to help them succeed in learning the lesson, not to distract them from the lesson. For example, you could tell a child that they can keep ONE small toy with them as long as they stay in their seat, but if they get up we have to put the toy away. That is taking a regular toy in the room and using it to encourage a good behavior.

• Be proactive, not reactive.

This simply means that it is better to try and stop an undesired behavior from happening, than to continually be correcting a child for the same behavior over and over again. Encourage your volunteers to try and watch for what could be causing the behavior so that they can come up with proactive solutions to replace the behavior with a better alternative. For example, if you have a child that continuously runs around the room towards the end of the lesson, you could probably conclude that that child’s attention span runs out after a certain amount of time. Rather than just waiting for it to happen and chasing the child around, look for signs of those behaviors beginning (such as wiggling in their chair) and tell them they can take a quick break to do jumping jacks in the back of the room before they return to their chair.

• Stay flexible.

I think it goes without saying that sometimes things don’t go as planned with kids in general. Some weekends are going to go better than others, and it is crucial that you continue to remind your volunteers not to get discouraged when everything doesn’t go smoothly. Just encourage them to continue looking for the wins and brainstorming new ideas until they find something that works for that child.

• Be welcoming

When new families with children join your special needs ministry, make sure to warmly welcome them in.

• Administering Medications

• This is a tricky issue. If a child needs to have medication during their stay with us, make a plan for the parent/guardian to come to the room to give the medication at the appointed time. Always have their number on speed dial so you can call them in quickly. Administering meds is carries liability that we don’t want you to carry. 

• Understanding Needs

The disability creates the context for sharing the gospel. It’s impossible to declare Christ’s love to a disabled child without also addressing in some way the child’s physical needs.

• “Perfect love casts out fear.”

Never is this advice truer than in reaching out to a child with a disability. Learn to look past a child’s physical appearance—the twisted smile and drool of a little boy with cerebral palsy or the bulky metal of the oversized wheelchair of a little girl with spina bifida. Look into their eyes and communicate the love of Christ with your smile. Kneel down to the child’s level. Use age-appropriate language, not “baby talk.” Talk to the child about subjects other than the disabling condition—ask about hobbies, pets, vacation memories, and school. At some point, later on, you’ll have paved the way to ask a sensitive question such as, “Thad, can you tell me what it feels like in your wheelchair? What are some of the neat things about being in your chair?”

• Use appropriate terminology.

Avoid words such as physically challenged, differently abled, or motion-impaired. Such trendy labels can communicate a sterile attitude that avoids the obvious realities of a physical disability. You’re safe when you say, “a child with a disability” or “a little girl with a handicapping condition.”

• Use redirection as primary means of behavior management.  Carefully avoid addressing conduct or actions negatively or with frustration in voice tone.  Negative recognition often feeds negative behavior.

• Offer a manipulative toy to an agitated or disruptive child.

• Do not remove a child from the group as a form of punishment. Separate a child in order to cease the disruption and/or allow the child to recollect for his own benefit.

• Only use physical touch for positive communication. Avoid grabbing a child by the arm to remove him from a situation.  Physical force can be humiliating to a child and is rarely interpreted positively by on-looking parents.

• Recognize that physical play, especially with boys, is normal and healthy. For children with sensory issues, rough-housing may indicate the presence of an immediate sensory need.  Take control by creating constructive ways for the children to employee gross-motor skills.

• Consistently and constantly praise individuals by name when they are attentive, disposing of their own trash, playing well with friends, and staying focused on the activity, etc.  The desire for praise is contagious even among children who appear less social.

• Consider instilling a reward system for a child who needs reinforcement for utilizing acceptable means for communication.  (See my earlier post Implementing a Reward System for Children with Special Needs).

• Allow a child to feel in control by creating opportunities for choices, “you may select either the red chair or the blue chair to sit in.”