Despite our grievances, and all of our losses, we pushed through, and still had hope.
I remember when covid first hit, I was already going through some problems with socialization and self-esteem. I was honestly really happy about not going to school anymore, because I hated having to speak to people as it made me extremely uncomfortable and overall, I feared everyone's opinion, even if it was just reading a paragraph out of a book.
By the time the next school year began, I was dreading the idea of having to be online on a Google Meet where I once again had to talk to people. At first I was like, "I can pull this off". I believed that by having my camera off, the teacher wouldn't know I was there and they wouldn't call on me. Then they made the rule of "cameras must be on at all times" and "students must all participate", so I would have to talk in front of not only my class, but my family that was at home. What I hated even more was having to work on group projects, where we would work on call. School itself wasn't too bad, I was the problem. I made everything a problem. Midway throughout the year, I was ready to give up. Not only on schoolwork, but on life.
But for some reason, there was something there holding me back. I felt like I couldn't give up, I still had hope. I had people out there, my friends, my family, my followers, I couldn't give up, not on them. My parents have raised me, my friends supported me, my followers were there for me. People loved me, even if I didn't love me. I had siblings that looked up to me, I couldn't give up on them I had to stay strong, I had to protect them. I had to continue.
And that's what I did. It's been two years since we were sent home March 13th of 6th grade, I'm now in eighth grade, back on campus and making friends. Things have gotten better, in both, my mind and the world. This is the new normal, but we just have to keep hope.
-Dixianah Cervantes